(no subject)
Well, well, well ,welly ,welly, well, welly,
Fuck boys, eh, i guess. Wouldn't be easier to just marry food? I knew a guy in kindergarden who wanted to marry grapes, he loved them so much, he was obviously a step ahead of us all, even in kindergarden. For example, this shortbread i'm eating from second cup... It's orgasmic. So who needs a boy when you have shortbread which is, first of all, always orgasmic, and really, honestly, doesn't mind, and would probably actually prefer if you were fat!!! You don't need to seduce shortbread, or pamper it, and it'll let you dress is up in whatever you want so you'll never get bored because, hey, you have carte blanche with variety. (i recommend improvising with wahtever is in your kitchen, like candied cherries, almonds and random spices which results in something that smells a lot like indian food and scares your spanish teacher.) And shortbread will never find you boring, you can jsut sit next to shortbread and read some Chuck palahniuk, write your own book for christsake, snore, pick your nose and fart... and shortbread will love you anyway. SHortbread won't notice your hairy legs and your hairy armpits, and shortbread will snuggle with you by the fire and give you orgasm upon orgasm without even going near your crotch. Shortbread can sit in on girl talk, can be sold to make money for charity, and won't really cheat on you, ever. Shortbread won't hold anything back, won't keep things inside, and you won't hear about everything through shortbread's friends. Short Shortbread will watch sappy movies with you, and when you get old, and you rmouth doenst work anymore, you can bake shortbread for other people, and shortbread will still know that you love it, and you'll know that it still loves you.
Fuck boys, eh, i guess. Wouldn't be easier to just marry food? I knew a guy in kindergarden who wanted to marry grapes, he loved them so much, he was obviously a step ahead of us all, even in kindergarden. For example, this shortbread i'm eating from second cup... It's orgasmic. So who needs a boy when you have shortbread which is, first of all, always orgasmic, and really, honestly, doesn't mind, and would probably actually prefer if you were fat!!! You don't need to seduce shortbread, or pamper it, and it'll let you dress is up in whatever you want so you'll never get bored because, hey, you have carte blanche with variety. (i recommend improvising with wahtever is in your kitchen, like candied cherries, almonds and random spices which results in something that smells a lot like indian food and scares your spanish teacher.) And shortbread will never find you boring, you can jsut sit next to shortbread and read some Chuck palahniuk, write your own book for christsake, snore, pick your nose and fart... and shortbread will love you anyway. SHortbread won't notice your hairy legs and your hairy armpits, and shortbread will snuggle with you by the fire and give you orgasm upon orgasm without even going near your crotch. Shortbread can sit in on girl talk, can be sold to make money for charity, and won't really cheat on you, ever. Shortbread won't hold anything back, won't keep things inside, and you won't hear about everything through shortbread's friends. Short Shortbread will watch sappy movies with you, and when you get old, and you rmouth doenst work anymore, you can bake shortbread for other people, and shortbread will still know that you love it, and you'll know that it still loves you.