Fic: Symbiotic Programming 2/?
Title: Symbiotic Programming
Chapter Title: Hazardous Road Conditions
Characters: Entire team
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I do not own Medical Investigation or this 'verse.
Author's Note: I'm hoping that no one is expecting works of art. These chapters will vary from metaphorical to dialogue-based as it progresses. What isn't answered in chapters like this one, will be in later installments; as this story focuses on before Natalie left, during her leave, and after 'Rabid Computer'. So, technically, it might be a very very very long piece of work. I don't want it to get mundane. Trust me, some of you might read this and say that our characters are, well, out of character. You have to realized, think of what the show writers would have done in season two or three. It is, after all, a drama serious. This could have ended up happening. Miscommunication between coworkers has led to worse. Part two, as promised.
Symbiotic Programming
Hazardous Road Conditions
Stephen's shoulders were hunched, his thick hands gripping the edge of the lab table. There was too much tension in the room, so much so that it had a tangible weight, bearing down on his posture while hers was erect. Had a spectator been present an analogy would have been made, comparing Stephen's position to that of a crouched lion, and Natalie's to that of the alert prey. They were bordering on argument, one preparing to make the kill while the other was looking for a chance to bound away.
You need to take a break was perched so dangerously on the tip of Natalie's tongue, her sealed lips the only means of security to hold them back. It was no use, however, she had already made the mistake of saying it to him in so many words. Perhaps if he had been more delicate while saying the same to her, a rebound might not have followed from her tired mouth.
She sensed the impending flow of harsh words before he could make them --one often subjected to them becomes well versed with the tell-tale signs. Natalie debated on whether to wait for the verbal lash or to hit the nail on the head with a calm collection of her own.
“I'm fine, Stephen.” Her intentions were to take the wind out of his sails a little, without having to vacate her position of duty.
“You are not fine,” he retorted, sails very much still full of hot air, “You've been running on no sleep!”
“So have you!”
Everything eventually maneuvered its way to anger. It was a fail-safe emotion that could be shared between two overtaxed adults. Natalie had once been able to pride herself with the knowledge that her temperament was vastly gentler than his, but lately, he'd had a way of forcing her to strike back, voice always louder than intended.
“We're not discussing me, Natalie.”
“I'll be fine,” She stressed again, her eyes averting from his to glance down at the microscope.
“You said that last time,” he countered, the change of volume a startling factor. When Connor whispered it was just as unnerving as when he yelled; it still held the same measure of anger. “Do I need to remind you what happened?”
Last time. Last time had almost resulted in her death. And while a reminder would be justified, the way he was going about it was uncalled for. Her almost death was not something an argument could be hinged off of, not by a man whose only comment on the subject had been one of scolding. She didn't need to be given a lecture on the patients' safety again.
With the heat rising in her cheeks, the blotches of angry red visible, Natalie left the lab without looking at him.
Stephen's eyes followed her retreat, convincing himself that some arguments were worth the undesirable ending. After all, last time she had worked on nothing but fumes, she had ended up his patient, and nearly the next statistic.
Even the most impassioned arguments dwindle into a bitter cold feud of words if not carefully handled. Although six eyes were often watching, the three witnesses feared what might happen if they attempted to step in. Crossing the line into the territory of deteriorating relationship, professional or otherwise, was as suicidal as skipping through a minefield blindfolded.
The once fluid dance of hidden codependency had changed. No longer did the two doctors maintain a careful system of checks and balances. There were no longer heated words to insure the other was still in line, no random acts of comfort that hardly stemmed beyond the touch of a hand or cold bottle of beer. They were divided, dancing methodically on opposite ends of a canyon, backs turned toward the schism so that neither had to face the truth. The truth so easily put into words by an incredulous Frank: if one wished to find the route between the doctors, any respectable GPS device would link Point A to Point B with a maze of lines and warnings of hazardous road conditions.
Even through the distance and the blindness Natalie and Connor forced themselves into, the underlying partnership remained. At least, in the caring sense. That's what this was all about, wasn't it? Miles often liked to whisper to Eva after particularly bad moments. Wasn't it just about the fact that although Natalie and Stephen cared for one another, they utterly failed at conveying it?
But that was what this was about. A lot of 'Wasn't it' s. Wasn't it enough that she did the work he required of her? Wasn't it enough that he stopped asking her to work with the patients, so it wouldn't hurt her nearly as much when they died? Wasn't it enough that she asked him if he was okay when he wasn't? Wasn't it okay that he had stopped getting angry with her and just ignored her when she did? Wasn't it that she could have died? Wasn't it enough that she had almost died?
Wasn't it enough that they were on the same side?
They were running under false assumptions, the pair. He assumed she cared too much about his work and not enough about her own. She assumed that he felt she couldn't do her job, and therefore rationed it off to others; she had screwed up, after all, as he continuously reminded her.
There was no surprise among the spectators when, after the first, passionate argument in a long long while occurred, Natalie Durant made the choice to leave. In truth, the only shock brought on by the development came to the two who had been working toward it since that day a mere slab of glass had shattered.