First Tea Review
The first victim - Good Hair-Look Herbal Tea, which was purchased at Moncton's only Asian grocery on the strength of the mad scientist cartoon on the front. It claims to help promote healthy hair growth, but warns that 'This product is not intended to replace your practitioner. It does not involve the proscribing of medicine for any disease.'
This tea was weak, man. It tasted like they had already made several cups of tea with the bag, then sold it to us. I'm pretty sure that the untranslated Chinese on the side of the box says "Fuck you, White Devil." As soon as this tea was cool enough to do so I poured the whole thing down my throat at once, just to get it over with. My follicles don't feel any healthier, and it tastes like a cat slept in my mouth, with a kind-of dirty sock aftertaste, the kind of dirty sock that is produced by a slow day at work if you're the type of person who doesn't have very stinky feet...
This tea was weak, man. It tasted like they had already made several cups of tea with the bag, then sold it to us. I'm pretty sure that the untranslated Chinese on the side of the box says "Fuck you, White Devil." As soon as this tea was cool enough to do so I poured the whole thing down my throat at once, just to get it over with. My follicles don't feel any healthier, and it tastes like a cat slept in my mouth, with a kind-of dirty sock aftertaste, the kind of dirty sock that is produced by a slow day at work if you're the type of person who doesn't have very stinky feet...