I want to tell you, that I love you, I love you.
yesterday scared me. it scared you I know. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. no more accidental secrets, I promise. it's just hard, I don't know, it's not that I don't trust you, I do, you're probably one of the very few people that I do trust, it's just that it's so unbelievably hard for me to be completely honest with anyone anymore. and I wasn't in any way intending to lie to you. I just never mentioned it, because I assumed you knew and I didn't really want to talk about it. there are some things that have happened that I'm not proud of. and it's just hard for me to talk about, it was a really terrible time in my life and no one knows the whole story, not even people who think they do. I've just never really been able to talk about it. but baby baby baby I had no idea you didn't know, though I shouldn't have expected you to, and I completely understand how upset you were. I've never seen you like that and it was hard for me to know that I made you feel like that. but now it's all out there, you know the truth, and everything's okay. I feel like this was good for us. I feel better. I feel better having told you that this scares me a little and knowing that you want me to be able to tell everything, that it's that important to you. you're important to me.
what a way to celebrate your birthday. I'll make it up to you in every way that I can. none of it matters anymore, it's in the past and now that it's out in the open, it will be easier for me to let go.
fuck fuck fuck that rwb.