May 30, 2005 01:36
Carina gave me love and apathy, hate and helplessness, and joy and gloom, heaven and heartbreak. For this I am thankful for to the end of the universe. But Matt gave me everything else- my religion, my political views, my musical taste; he molded me from just a walking piece of clay. To this I do not even know how to describe my thankfulness. God I miss the feelings you two give me, incredibly.
The Hopeless Pupil
Everything I own and make isn't worthy for your gift.
Everything I know I leeched from you; the better.
Everyone I have yet loved and everyone I've made love to
Was drawn to me because of who you cut me out to be
My timing was so bad back then, leaving me so young.
I'm just a little kid without a hand like yours to cling to.
Your soft glow amuses me, your stare is so professional
Why cant I put my shirts on right when you are standing near me?
I taught myself these instruments to bring emotion to your soul
But what a useless ant I am when you can simply wave your hand
And all the force of hurricanes explode from my brown eyes
The tears stampede like bulls; your whispers soothe my cries.
Everything I write and sing is just a mockery of love
The depth and strength and warmth of which I'll likely never know
Your big words confused me then; I was so small and useless
But now that you have held my hand and taught my how to use them
I can now impress others, I can now write pretty letters
But nothing that will ever make me feel I've served you well
Your picture rests so dusty now, alone and wrapped in silk
It takes up little space and seems so lonely on my bottom shelf
Why sure I have your number here, inside of my romantic head
Where I keep our memories and everything you've taught me
One day I promise I'll escape this wretched nightmare world
So you can sit me down again and read to me your words.