(no subject)
When you are consumed with beauty and love, it is okay. Everything is sincerely okay. Even the negativity that surrounds me at times. Even the unhappy thoughts that cross my mind. The anger I occasionally feel. The jealousy that used to encompass me. The acceptance and denial of all things around me. When utterly consumed in beauty and love, it is OKAY. I can deal with it. I am positive. I can still smile and move on. I can LIVE.
I can.
I can.
And this means more to me than anything.
For so long I believed I was untouchable. Unhealable. Crazy and meant to be locked away because I was not fit to live here.
But I can....
This is all so beautiful...
It's not okay. No, nothing is perfect. Nothing is fine.
But inside, it is. I am mentally able to handle this. I can accept hurt and embrace it with love and beauty.
There are no small things. No insignificant subtle murderers to stalk my mind.
The past is there. The past will always be there. The neglect, betrayl, all of that pain. That is part of what built who I am. The paranoia is still there. The bipolarity is still there.
But is okay.
I can accept and move on.
Because I love.
Thank you, Bryan, for teaching me that there are other things than pain in life. And that it is, in fact, possible to move on.
Mmm...chai tea is so good.
AND LEAF! I'm so excited about LEAF! I got my ticket today! Geez Louise!!
I want to kiss the world on her nose and tell her everything will be okay.
^.^
I can.
I can.
And this means more to me than anything.
For so long I believed I was untouchable. Unhealable. Crazy and meant to be locked away because I was not fit to live here.
But I can....
This is all so beautiful...
It's not okay. No, nothing is perfect. Nothing is fine.
But inside, it is. I am mentally able to handle this. I can accept hurt and embrace it with love and beauty.
There are no small things. No insignificant subtle murderers to stalk my mind.
The past is there. The past will always be there. The neglect, betrayl, all of that pain. That is part of what built who I am. The paranoia is still there. The bipolarity is still there.
But is okay.
I can accept and move on.
Because I love.
Thank you, Bryan, for teaching me that there are other things than pain in life. And that it is, in fact, possible to move on.
Mmm...chai tea is so good.
AND LEAF! I'm so excited about LEAF! I got my ticket today! Geez Louise!!
I want to kiss the world on her nose and tell her everything will be okay.
^.^