...cause I'm going to strawberry fields, nothing is real
I've really been a hermit crab lately.
I don't really feel like I have anything in common with any of my friends anymore (except for the ones that don't live here)
I just feel like moving to Los Angeles, and what I learned there, and dating Aaron and learning from him has just completely changed my values, my interests, my tastes...and really it's a far cry from who I used to be, which I see as a really positive thing.
It just kind of sucks, because I don't want to just hang out with Aaron all the time, but when I'm not with him I don't feel like calling anybody because I don't want to be fake towards them and pretend that I'm still into all the same things that we all used to be into. And the really hard thing is, I don't know exaclty how to break away from that easily without too many feelings being mislead...or something.
I applied for a job at Urban Outfitters (even though I hate retail) because I'm hoping that maybe, maybe, maybe, hopefully, hopefully, hopefully!!! I'll meet someone who agrees with the things I agree with and is into the same things that I'm into, and just isn't so god damn fake!
Really, I'm tired of trying to put a show on for people. I just want to be able to be myself and care about the things I care about, and not give a shit about other things and not feel so judged for it.
I just have this really huge emptiness feeling in me, and I can't think of any other thing that it could be from. That or the fact that I have far too much free time and still cannot manage to clean my room and make it liveable.
I just need to start making a life for myself. A new life, that isn't exhausting becuase it's fake, but actually fun, because it's real.
ya know?
oh yeah...me and Aaron celebrated our 1 year on the 7th! Woo Hoo for us! Good thing there are many more years to come. I seriously love him a lot a lot a lot. I love the things that he has opened my eyes to.
I don't really feel like I have anything in common with any of my friends anymore (except for the ones that don't live here)
I just feel like moving to Los Angeles, and what I learned there, and dating Aaron and learning from him has just completely changed my values, my interests, my tastes...and really it's a far cry from who I used to be, which I see as a really positive thing.
It just kind of sucks, because I don't want to just hang out with Aaron all the time, but when I'm not with him I don't feel like calling anybody because I don't want to be fake towards them and pretend that I'm still into all the same things that we all used to be into. And the really hard thing is, I don't know exaclty how to break away from that easily without too many feelings being mislead...or something.
I applied for a job at Urban Outfitters (even though I hate retail) because I'm hoping that maybe, maybe, maybe, hopefully, hopefully, hopefully!!! I'll meet someone who agrees with the things I agree with and is into the same things that I'm into, and just isn't so god damn fake!
Really, I'm tired of trying to put a show on for people. I just want to be able to be myself and care about the things I care about, and not give a shit about other things and not feel so judged for it.
I just have this really huge emptiness feeling in me, and I can't think of any other thing that it could be from. That or the fact that I have far too much free time and still cannot manage to clean my room and make it liveable.
I just need to start making a life for myself. A new life, that isn't exhausting becuase it's fake, but actually fun, because it's real.
ya know?
oh yeah...me and Aaron celebrated our 1 year on the 7th! Woo Hoo for us! Good thing there are many more years to come. I seriously love him a lot a lot a lot. I love the things that he has opened my eyes to.