I need to spill...
Okay so if you don't want to hear me complain for a while about all of the deep things on my mind right now.. i suggest you just stop reading right now.
My great-uncle bob died on monday. it's not that i was extremley close to him. it's just the fact of how he died. he had a stroke 2 weeks ago and lost all control of his muscles in his neck. he had it in his will to not be put on life support, and a feeding tube would be considered "life support" and since he couldn't swallow. he starved. when you're hungry it hurts, and when you know that someone you loved died from being hungry. it just about kills you. it's just the worst thing to imagine. im rather relieved that i didnt see him while he was in hospice. im glad i get to remember him for that cute little old man he used to be.
thea neil i miss you so much babe. you are SO brave to go do to belgium for an entire year, i have so much respect for you. i miss all of our car rides though in that gorgeous bmw and our gossip. and just you being there for me in general. i can not wait until june when i see you. i miss being able to tell you everything and anything, and you not thinking any different of me for the retarded words that had just came out of my mouth.
my gorgeous boyfriend left until sunday for florida. i never realized how much i looked forward to seeing him throughout the day, until i didnt see him at all today. it's rather sad. it's funny to think that we've been dating for a month and a half, and we've seen each other every single day of that time. its amazing when we're together, but when your gone for this long. it makes it even harder. so sunday please come soon?
gabby and i never talk anymore. it sucks. we used to be so close when thea was here. and now that thea left, gabby and i have done nothing but drift apart. i dont know if it's because of me or what. but it really sucks to think of all the great times we've had together, and now we're like completley different people, and barely even acknowledge each other. ehh blah
in like..i dunno a couple months ago i made the mistake of running my mouth and calling one of my best friends a terrible terrible name, that i never should of. and since then, we don't talk. and im pretty sure she absolutley despises me. i wish i could turn back time sometimes. i would make a lot of things different, but i can't. so life goes on. i just have to learn from those mistakes ive made.
so. im sorry for all of you that read that. it was a serious confessional. but i feel a lot better now.
im actually not a depressed person at all. i just only write in this thing when i need to spill.
other than those few things bugging me. my life is perfect.
i have one amazing boyfriend
i have super fun friends
and a family that cares about me.
and im going to mexico for spring breakkkkk.. heck yeah!
so yeah advanced algebra is calling my name.
<3 you. kbye.
My great-uncle bob died on monday. it's not that i was extremley close to him. it's just the fact of how he died. he had a stroke 2 weeks ago and lost all control of his muscles in his neck. he had it in his will to not be put on life support, and a feeding tube would be considered "life support" and since he couldn't swallow. he starved. when you're hungry it hurts, and when you know that someone you loved died from being hungry. it just about kills you. it's just the worst thing to imagine. im rather relieved that i didnt see him while he was in hospice. im glad i get to remember him for that cute little old man he used to be.
thea neil i miss you so much babe. you are SO brave to go do to belgium for an entire year, i have so much respect for you. i miss all of our car rides though in that gorgeous bmw and our gossip. and just you being there for me in general. i can not wait until june when i see you. i miss being able to tell you everything and anything, and you not thinking any different of me for the retarded words that had just came out of my mouth.
my gorgeous boyfriend left until sunday for florida. i never realized how much i looked forward to seeing him throughout the day, until i didnt see him at all today. it's rather sad. it's funny to think that we've been dating for a month and a half, and we've seen each other every single day of that time. its amazing when we're together, but when your gone for this long. it makes it even harder. so sunday please come soon?
gabby and i never talk anymore. it sucks. we used to be so close when thea was here. and now that thea left, gabby and i have done nothing but drift apart. i dont know if it's because of me or what. but it really sucks to think of all the great times we've had together, and now we're like completley different people, and barely even acknowledge each other. ehh blah
in like..i dunno a couple months ago i made the mistake of running my mouth and calling one of my best friends a terrible terrible name, that i never should of. and since then, we don't talk. and im pretty sure she absolutley despises me. i wish i could turn back time sometimes. i would make a lot of things different, but i can't. so life goes on. i just have to learn from those mistakes ive made.
so. im sorry for all of you that read that. it was a serious confessional. but i feel a lot better now.
im actually not a depressed person at all. i just only write in this thing when i need to spill.
other than those few things bugging me. my life is perfect.
i have one amazing boyfriend
i have super fun friends
and a family that cares about me.
and im going to mexico for spring breakkkkk.. heck yeah!
so yeah advanced algebra is calling my name.
<3 you. kbye.