invisible for one day. just one
somedays, no matter how perfect they are, i just want to be invisible.
i don't want to exist.
i don't want people to know me, or remember me.
i want to go away.
i want to be invisible.
i hear how pretty i am. are they being nice or speaking the truth? i don't see it. i look at my pictures, i look in the mirror, i try everything and i can never see it. makes me believe people are just being polite. they are doing what is expected of them. i can't see it. i see teh flaws and thats all. i see what a horrible person i am. i see everything that i hate in a person.
then theres everything i feel. how do you tear your bestest friend down. break her. whyw ould you do that. i didn't mean to but it kept coming out. what kind of person does that
i am trying to avoid writing what is on my mind. cuz it hurts. and i don't knwo why its here. im trying everything so that id on't do what im best at. running. i run when things get tough. and im tryinmg sooo hard but i can't. im withdrawn. and it hurts to be around people. it hurts more to be around people that know it. im soo empty and i hate it. i hate being empty. i want to go back. back to when i didn't hate myself. just go back. i want to love me i do, everyone says im awsome, why i can't see it. im tired of people. im tired of putting my smile on. im tired. im soo tired. but it hurts everyone sooo much for me to not put that smile on. i know they see the tears. and i try to hide it i do. and im sooo sorry that i can't. i really am. sometimes im just too tired. i pretend for everybody but im scared of myself. im scared of what i'll do, because i know what i want to do. and im just sooo sorry.
i don't want to exist.
i don't want people to know me, or remember me.
i want to go away.
i want to be invisible.
i hear how pretty i am. are they being nice or speaking the truth? i don't see it. i look at my pictures, i look in the mirror, i try everything and i can never see it. makes me believe people are just being polite. they are doing what is expected of them. i can't see it. i see teh flaws and thats all. i see what a horrible person i am. i see everything that i hate in a person.
then theres everything i feel. how do you tear your bestest friend down. break her. whyw ould you do that. i didn't mean to but it kept coming out. what kind of person does that
i am trying to avoid writing what is on my mind. cuz it hurts. and i don't knwo why its here. im trying everything so that id on't do what im best at. running. i run when things get tough. and im tryinmg sooo hard but i can't. im withdrawn. and it hurts to be around people. it hurts more to be around people that know it. im soo empty and i hate it. i hate being empty. i want to go back. back to when i didn't hate myself. just go back. i want to love me i do, everyone says im awsome, why i can't see it. im tired of people. im tired of putting my smile on. im tired. im soo tired. but it hurts everyone sooo much for me to not put that smile on. i know they see the tears. and i try to hide it i do. and im sooo sorry that i can't. i really am. sometimes im just too tired. i pretend for everybody but im scared of myself. im scared of what i'll do, because i know what i want to do. and im just sooo sorry.