(no subject)
The following will contain some gender stereotypes and some stereotypes in general. There aren't many folks on my friends list that are easily offended (the easily offended have already defriended me), but if you are offended by stereotypes, you can bite me and move on to the next LJ entry about the Watchmen movie or whatever else LJ entries are about (on a side note, I saw Watchmen, I liked it. On another sidenote, what exactly are LJ entries about these days? I have so few active friends that I don't even know anymore).
Guys are more into hobbies than girls. Guys also typically have more hobbies than girls and there are far more stereotypical guy hobbies than there are stereotypical girl hobbies. What made me think of this? Today was a drizzly, ugly, low visibility day. I was rushing to make a few deliveries by one of our many deadlines and I drove past a golf course. I looked over and, through the fog, there was a group of golfers playing. It wasn't raining hard out, but it was foggy. How foggy was it? It was so foggy, I saw a polar bear climbing into a refridgerator trying to keep warm! Wait...that didn't make sense, I think I mixed my metaphors. Either way, it was foggy, ugly, and raw. Yet there was a group of guys happily swinging away at little white balls that they, in all likelyhood, would never see again.
My friend Mike counts down the minutes to opening day of hunting season. He'll wake up at 4am to make sure he's out in the field before dawn and sit there. He's been doing this for nearly 20 years and he has nabbed exactly 1 deer. When he's not waking up at 4 for hunting season, he's waking up at 3 to drive up to take the boat out and catch some fish. Kellen will wake up early on a Sunday and start his breakfast by making football picks. He'll start with the pregame shows, he'll watch the 1:00 game, he'll switch back and forth between 4:00 games, he'll watch the night game, he'll watch the post game shows, he'll watch the analysis shows, he'll watch the Monday morning quarterback shows, he'll watch the celebrations, he'll watch the Monday night game, and he'll start to prepare his picks for next week. You want to know who the third string quarterback for Tampa Bay is? Not only does he know, but he knows what college this guy went to, his time in the 40 at the combine, his shoe size, and how he takes his coffee. My brother has cleared out his spare bedroom and filled it with rocks. Real rocks, found in dunes, quarries, woods, and paths. One of these days his floor is going to collapse and his landlord will be crushed in his sleep by a pile of rubble. My brother does all this so that he and his friend can make tracks for their remote control off road trucks. Ladies, believe it or not, he's single. Act now, before someone else does. Luke has an entire shelf set aside in his tiny Boston apartment shared with 3 others that is dedicated to making his own beers. There are tubes, kegs, bottles, ingredients, and beers everywhere in a place that isn't even big enough to stretch your arms because the 10,000 breweries already out there don't make enough beer. What about me? I've read most of the 1000 pages of this year's Baseball Prospectus. I've read about the top 5 prospects in every organization from Baseball America. I've read the Hardball Times Annual, the Baseball Forecaster, the Bill James Abstract, and every magazine I can get my hands on. I have a harddrive full of spreadsheets and lists. I have dollar values, draft orders, news, and notes. Last year my 5 fantasy baseball teams came in 1st, 1st, 1st, tied for 1st, and 2nd. This year I'm going very light with only 3, but it's very likely I'll be in the top 3 in each league. I might even sign up for a couple last minute leagues. I've had as many as 12 in a year.
Guys get into their hobbies. You wouldn't see a girl swinging a club in the rain or setting aside an entire room for remote control cars. Give me a friend, a case of beer, and a PS3 and the only time I'll be getting out of my chair for the next 14 hours, with the exception of pee breaks will be to open the door for the Dominos guy. But female gamers are few and far in between.
Now, you might be thinking that the guys golfing in the fog are idiots and so are all of the guys, including myself, that I described. And your assessment might be spot on. But there's something else those things have in common and I realized it after thinking about it for a little bit. Beer. A guy will do anything if there's a beer present. And I think that might be the difference between guys and the fairer, less drunk sex. Women will keep themselves occupied with things a bit more productive than swinging a stick, hauling some rocks, or growing attached to the couch. Guys will intently go about their project until the supply of beer runs out.
I guess the moral of the story is that if you're bored, take up drinking. You never know what kinds of useless things you'll find to occupy your time.
Anyways, the quarter of foggy golfers are my new heroes of the day. I imagine that, not only were they going to finish that round of golf, but they were going to brag about it on Monday to their golfin buddies and coworkers. But first, I'm sure they planned on spending some time at the 19th hole.
Guys are more into hobbies than girls. Guys also typically have more hobbies than girls and there are far more stereotypical guy hobbies than there are stereotypical girl hobbies. What made me think of this? Today was a drizzly, ugly, low visibility day. I was rushing to make a few deliveries by one of our many deadlines and I drove past a golf course. I looked over and, through the fog, there was a group of golfers playing. It wasn't raining hard out, but it was foggy. How foggy was it? It was so foggy, I saw a polar bear climbing into a refridgerator trying to keep warm! Wait...that didn't make sense, I think I mixed my metaphors. Either way, it was foggy, ugly, and raw. Yet there was a group of guys happily swinging away at little white balls that they, in all likelyhood, would never see again.
My friend Mike counts down the minutes to opening day of hunting season. He'll wake up at 4am to make sure he's out in the field before dawn and sit there. He's been doing this for nearly 20 years and he has nabbed exactly 1 deer. When he's not waking up at 4 for hunting season, he's waking up at 3 to drive up to take the boat out and catch some fish. Kellen will wake up early on a Sunday and start his breakfast by making football picks. He'll start with the pregame shows, he'll watch the 1:00 game, he'll switch back and forth between 4:00 games, he'll watch the night game, he'll watch the post game shows, he'll watch the analysis shows, he'll watch the Monday morning quarterback shows, he'll watch the celebrations, he'll watch the Monday night game, and he'll start to prepare his picks for next week. You want to know who the third string quarterback for Tampa Bay is? Not only does he know, but he knows what college this guy went to, his time in the 40 at the combine, his shoe size, and how he takes his coffee. My brother has cleared out his spare bedroom and filled it with rocks. Real rocks, found in dunes, quarries, woods, and paths. One of these days his floor is going to collapse and his landlord will be crushed in his sleep by a pile of rubble. My brother does all this so that he and his friend can make tracks for their remote control off road trucks. Ladies, believe it or not, he's single. Act now, before someone else does. Luke has an entire shelf set aside in his tiny Boston apartment shared with 3 others that is dedicated to making his own beers. There are tubes, kegs, bottles, ingredients, and beers everywhere in a place that isn't even big enough to stretch your arms because the 10,000 breweries already out there don't make enough beer. What about me? I've read most of the 1000 pages of this year's Baseball Prospectus. I've read about the top 5 prospects in every organization from Baseball America. I've read the Hardball Times Annual, the Baseball Forecaster, the Bill James Abstract, and every magazine I can get my hands on. I have a harddrive full of spreadsheets and lists. I have dollar values, draft orders, news, and notes. Last year my 5 fantasy baseball teams came in 1st, 1st, 1st, tied for 1st, and 2nd. This year I'm going very light with only 3, but it's very likely I'll be in the top 3 in each league. I might even sign up for a couple last minute leagues. I've had as many as 12 in a year.
Guys get into their hobbies. You wouldn't see a girl swinging a club in the rain or setting aside an entire room for remote control cars. Give me a friend, a case of beer, and a PS3 and the only time I'll be getting out of my chair for the next 14 hours, with the exception of pee breaks will be to open the door for the Dominos guy. But female gamers are few and far in between.
Now, you might be thinking that the guys golfing in the fog are idiots and so are all of the guys, including myself, that I described. And your assessment might be spot on. But there's something else those things have in common and I realized it after thinking about it for a little bit. Beer. A guy will do anything if there's a beer present. And I think that might be the difference between guys and the fairer, less drunk sex. Women will keep themselves occupied with things a bit more productive than swinging a stick, hauling some rocks, or growing attached to the couch. Guys will intently go about their project until the supply of beer runs out.
I guess the moral of the story is that if you're bored, take up drinking. You never know what kinds of useless things you'll find to occupy your time.
Anyways, the quarter of foggy golfers are my new heroes of the day. I imagine that, not only were they going to finish that round of golf, but they were going to brag about it on Monday to their golfin buddies and coworkers. But first, I'm sure they planned on spending some time at the 19th hole.