Hmmmph........
I love this little "pattern" we are slowly weaving ourselves into once more. The second you come online, you come to my journal, in hopes of reading something that I have written about you, just so that you can have the privilage of holding the "information' or "the good comment" over my head. Something that you can sucker me into, so that we start talking again, first online, then eventually on the phone. Sure, sure, it's all innocent and simple now, but in a few weeks, days even, when we really do start talking, and we maybe do hang out, it's always brought up about the "feelings." I'm not doing that again, I don't have feelings anymore, when with guys I feel nothing, complete emptyness where you sit and watch the clock in hopes that it would move faster for your curfew to approach quicker. Except when it involves you, you claim you love me, and I cry, well fuck that, it's shit, everything you say is shit. All your lines are pre-recorded, all your evil schemes are already pre-planned. You are dangerous, dangerous not only to my heart, and health, but to my very being. Hence why you were denoted "Monster" ie. something that you should be deathly afraid of that you should want to stay as far away from as possible, but for some reason there is always that strange attraction to them in story books and such. Ugh, why did you have to die, and what resignated from the ashes have be what there is today??? If I could trust you then I would love to be friends with you, but since you have made it abundantly clear that I should never trust you or anyone like you ever again, then well I have my severe doubts. I doubt you, anything you say, as well as any and all intentions that you have. You are dangerous..........