Fresh.
Okay. I guess I need a fresh start on this thing since a lot has been happening lately. For the past few months I have been struggling with anorexia, but it is getting better. I admit, I am doing a lot better than I was, but now everytime I look in the mirror I just feel horrible. I really need to work through this. I was down to 85 pounds, and now I am back to 115. It's disgusting. I hate it. There isn't a day that goes by when I don't think about how I used to look, how nice it would be again to be that small. But, I also have to think about my health. I really messed up my kidneys when I did that, to the point I was almost hospitalized one day because I was in so much pain. There was blood in my urine off and on for a couple of months, and that can still happen now. I even stopped mensturating for 3 months. My eating habits are almost back to normal, but after everytime I eat I get really angry at myself. Another thing I'll have to work through. I don't want hate comments or comments like "you idiot./stop whining." If you don't want to read about my life or what's going on in it, do not read my entries. This is a place where I need to vent about things. This has been a very short update, but I will update more often since my life is back on track for now.