To clarify my point (if I can, this inability to articulate is driving me bonkers) about Lily and Narcissa. JKR has supposedly set this series up so that all the Houses will turn out to be equal, if different; thus, at least in the HP-verse, all people are equal, if different. Great real-world message. But the problem is, she's juxtaposed that
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I mean, if she holds Lily's sacrifice above James' it seems like that particular sacrifice must be important to her, maybe because she's said she fears death etc. So it seems to really be something to aspire to--enough that DD refers to Merope as lacking courage and so letting her son down by dying the way she did, and it matters that James didn't have a chance, and Harry even wonders about Neville's parents in that same position.
Personally, I can't see Narcissa standing aside any more than Lily would. Although maybe she'd have attacked from her position.:)
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Maybe there's something about Lily's sacrifice that we don't know yet. JKR has this way of wanting to have her cake and eat it, too. It's like someone was saying in that poll; she blamed Harry before Draco because she has higher expectations of him, as the hero. Same with Hermione and Umbridge. But JKR doesn't seem to think the fact that her heroes often do lower themselves to the level of her villains is any reason to stop giving them the benefit of the doubt every time; or, conversely, enough to actually give the villains that same benefit. It's not a level playing field, which sucks because she's writing as thought it is.
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