I'm Cutting All of You Off.
And perhaps, if I was a dog, I'd go to an obedience school.
I'd be obedient to you.
And perhaps, if I was a son, a son of a man,
I'd mark another scar on my arm.
I'd be obedient to you.
Does anyone ever use LJ, as a real journal? Other than just using it as a public expository for our lives and boastings?
I have a couple scars that I've given myself. I'm not proud of it. I'm not bragging about it. I just want to let a lot of you know something that you don't know. I am not happy and I do not feel fulfilled with my life and what I have been dealt. Yes, I've had seriously suicidal thoughts and I've harmed myself on many occasions hoping to feel reborn the next day. It has never worked and I am still out searching.
Though I may seem ambitious and optimistic, I must admit I cannot follow through on anything I say. My videos were shit and my music was short lived. My stories and billions of writing projects went nowhere. My goals I set in high school have crumbled and are forgotten.
I cannot keep friendships for the life of me. I have a lot of flaws, I know. I'm sorry for that too. For those that stuck by and tried to figure me out, I am sorry. I am sorry for lashing out at you. I am forever indifferent.
Losing my computer and all my work has got me to open my eyes and realize what I really don't have. I held onto the past and all the memories I saved in text files. Now that they're gone I truly have nothing. And I'm sure those who read this now, know I can't even keep this stupid thing going. I'll have little waves of writing, but they never last.
For Christ's sake guys... if you've got anything going... keep it going.
So long.
I'd be obedient to you.
And perhaps, if I was a son, a son of a man,
I'd mark another scar on my arm.
I'd be obedient to you.
Does anyone ever use LJ, as a real journal? Other than just using it as a public expository for our lives and boastings?
I have a couple scars that I've given myself. I'm not proud of it. I'm not bragging about it. I just want to let a lot of you know something that you don't know. I am not happy and I do not feel fulfilled with my life and what I have been dealt. Yes, I've had seriously suicidal thoughts and I've harmed myself on many occasions hoping to feel reborn the next day. It has never worked and I am still out searching.
Though I may seem ambitious and optimistic, I must admit I cannot follow through on anything I say. My videos were shit and my music was short lived. My stories and billions of writing projects went nowhere. My goals I set in high school have crumbled and are forgotten.
I cannot keep friendships for the life of me. I have a lot of flaws, I know. I'm sorry for that too. For those that stuck by and tried to figure me out, I am sorry. I am sorry for lashing out at you. I am forever indifferent.
Losing my computer and all my work has got me to open my eyes and realize what I really don't have. I held onto the past and all the memories I saved in text files. Now that they're gone I truly have nothing. And I'm sure those who read this now, know I can't even keep this stupid thing going. I'll have little waves of writing, but they never last.
For Christ's sake guys... if you've got anything going... keep it going.
So long.