my heart spills over white rugs like too much cheap wine...

[starzz133]

i had so much good to say about today. about pistachio ice cream and walking home with kat today. finding beautiful lines. reaffirming that people never cease to suprise me. i wanted to say it beautifully and feel beautiful because i had something worthwhile to share. but my parents always manage to fuck things up. when i think about them right now, and why they get me so angry, it reminds me of a line from fight club. when marla asked jack why he goes to group therapy sessions and he says "when people think you're dying they really listen... instead of just waiting for their chance to speak." thats what its like, not being heard. well, they do hear me, they must-- but they don't listen. but enough. this is not the right forum for me to be talking about this. up until a little while ago, my day was really picking up, i had a great afternoon, i could talk about music forever. im seeing my soulmates this weekend, its going to be incredible. things are looking a little better. if i surround myself with good friends, my parents won't matter as much. and i definetly do have good friends.

my pillow has my name all over it right about now. maybe i'll dream about you :)

g'night--
lynda