Adoration For None
Wow.. long time.. don't know why Im posting really. I have been feeling a somewhat disconnect from many friends lately, and I am unsure as to why. Perhaps it may be my fault, but perhaps it may be me reaching my future. I have always felt a certain strength when alone, but there are times in life when you desire a being beside you to enjoy the some moments in lfie.
I am not a family person. I simply do not 'feel' any different when with family than when I am alone or with other people. I may be seen as a bad person because of this, but it is not something I can change about myself. The situation has arisen where family members are able to be more involved in my life, yet for some reason, I do not have an opinion on the matter, and I cannot express any emotion onto whether or whether or not I want them to be.
I have been having a propensity to want to be older, for time to move on at a greater rate at which it is. I cannot do many things I desire to at this point in my life and I am stuck in the time of 'waiting.' Many friends I know that are much older keep saying to enjoy the time you have while you are young. I disagree greatly, I cannot acquire sufficient funds to do what I truly want at this age, therefore I am adamant about time moving on so that I can.
After months of occassionaly searching various friend networking websites, I seem to have found the lovely girl that I met on my trip to Hawaii. She seems happy and with another person at the moment, I know she is a smart girl and I hope things work out for her. I cant say I didnt feel somewhat heart broken when I saw, but I figured it would only be a matter of time before she found someone else. Its really a shame because I had planned on calling her sometime next week, but its too late, and I am forced to move on once again.
This is your life, and its ending one minute at a time.