Alien Hunter
I just watched a science fiction movie in which I believe it may be possible that actually ALL of the plot-driving science was wrong. I will now list some of its major stupidities:
--- Telepathic aliens do not speak English.
--- Telepathic aliens do not speak.
--- Telepathic aliens do not write in English.
--- Telepathic aliens do not write.
--- Writing English and speaking English are not the same thing.
--- Language is NOT mathematics.
--- Mathematics is NOT language.
--- Language is not spoken language.
--- Language is not a writing system.
--- When a hot chick offers to "keep you company" while you take a shower, DO NOT reply that you really shouldn't, because you have to keep watching your computer look for aliens.
--- Aliens do not format their messages taking into account the width of an Earth computer screen.
--- When the alien is in your lab, it should NOT take you very long to find it.
--- When the alien is in your lab, finding it should NOT require a computer.
--- When the alien is in your lab, finding it should NOT require advanced knowledge of mathematics, or for that matter, basic arithmetic.
--- When you discover a closed container that is clearly of alien origin, DO NOT OPEN IT.
--- If you have opened a container of alien origin, DO NOT TOUCH IT.
--- If you have opened and touched a container of alien origin, and the guy who touched it being MELTED ALIVE did not serve as a deterrant to you, allow me to suggest that you NOT poke anything inside the space ship with a pointy stick you found lying on the floor.
--- When you find an alien who "looks dead" DO NOT wander off and ignore it for a bit while you decide what to do.
--- When the only way Earth and humanity have a snowball's chance in hell of surviving the next five minutes are for the alien you just woke up and poked with a pointy stick to forgive you for being mean stick-poking dumbfucks and decide to do you a really big favor that you absolutely do not deserve, DO NOT SHOOT THE ALIEN.
--- NEVER under any circumstances kill the only person who understands the problem.
--- Alien pathogens should not be expected to be similar to pathogens on Earth.
--- Nuclear radiation mutates pathogens.
--- When a pathogen is contained within a building that is somehow magically air-tight and alien pathogen-tight, blowing up the building is NOT a good way to "contain" the pathogen.
--- Just because you know absolutely nothing about the nature of a given pathogen, and nuclear weapons make big explosions, does not mean that nuking the pathogen is a wise choice.
--- The big cold place near Russia is NOT Antarctica.
--- The United States has its own nuclear submarines.
--- In Antarctica, water that's outside freezes.
--- Corn is NOT more important than the survival of the human race.
--- If all life on Earth dies, corn will no longer be needed.
--- If all life on Earth dies, corn will be dead.
--- If you can shout, "I can't breathe" twenty times, clearly you CAN in fact, breathe.
--- When the CIA gives a codename to something, they do NOT use an anagram of its actual name.
--- What to do about an alien pathogen on Earth is not a decision that should be left up to the President of the United States, the US Secretary of Defense, or any other human, so long as the aliens who carry the pathogen are conveniently nearby, conveniently telepathic, conveniently friendly, conveniently motivated to save humanity's collective ass, and conveniently omnipotent.