(no subject)
Illusions are gone. But I'm afraid of what's underneath, because there is frighteningly little. Midnight revelations tell me what they always have. I'd almost forgotten what it felt like to be this alone, to know that nothing I do is really worthwhile anymore. I wanted so badly to be able to focus my unfulfilled desires somewhere, but after everything is said and done I realize that they had little to do with reality. There isn't very much that matters to me now, and when I try to fill the empty spaces I am only deluding myself. I've said before that something needs to change, and it is truer than ever. I can't go on anymore without anything to distract me from my own boredom.
It's late and I'm prone to melodrama. I guess this is the wrong time to try to be objective. I'll feel better in the morning. All of this is kind of ridiculous, really. Just a plea for sympathy or attention. I think I need people more than I let on.
It's late and I'm prone to melodrama. I guess this is the wrong time to try to be objective. I'll feel better in the morning. All of this is kind of ridiculous, really. Just a plea for sympathy or attention. I think I need people more than I let on.