College can't come fast enough.
My mom had another ridiculous outburst today. James had to work today at 4, so I invited him over to swim in the early afternoon, and I told my mom, she said it was fine. Then, my dog proceeded to make that horrible gagging noise that dogs make right before they barf all over the newly shampooed carpet, and I freaked out and was trying to get Savannah out the door to throw up somewhere more convenient. My mom is so fucking deaf and whenever I say anything like "Hey, your phone is ringing," she will reply by shouting back "I know your uncle went to Reno!!". So, that's just prior knowledge. But James called and was at the door, and I was trying to get Savannah upstairs so that she wouldn't attack him, and my mom started screaming at me not to put her outside, and I kept shouting that I was putting her upstairs, not outside, and my mom screamed back thinking that I said something completed unrelated and continues to yell at me for the way I talk to her, which is ridiculous because she doesn't even know what the fuck I've said. So then when I'm about to let James in, she starts screaming that she won't have him in the house, and she hates him and his parents, etc, and I felt so bad cuz he could hear her, it was so humiliating. So I went around and let him in thru the side gate so we could just swim and avoid my mom altogether, and she comes out and starts screaming about how much she hates his parents and for him to get out. So I went inside, put my shoes on, and James and I left and went to his house so I could get away from her and he could get ready for work. It was just so pointless, we could have had a nice day of sun and swimming, but my mom had to ruin it. She has absolutely no reason to hate James, or his parents. She's just jealous because I would rather be with him and his parents than with her and my dad. But just look at how she acts, why would I want to be around her? I can't stand her! I feel so guilty that shit always happens like this with my parents, and it really sucks for James. He hasn't done anything at all wrong, and my parents still hate him. It sucks because I love him so much, and he loves me so much, and it would be nice if my parents could at least be civil to the man I plan on marrying. I mean, I gave up a long time ago on the hope that they would contribute at all to the wedding bills, but now I really don't think they're even getting an invitation.