Bittercon: CosParenting
Here's another interesting discussion panel topic from Tampa Bay Comic Con.
My response is predicated on parsing the title as a portmaneau of "cosplay" and "parenting," and draws upon the discussion of people feeling as if they're just LARPing their way through life.
Imposter syndrome is real, and it seems as if it's actively getting worse, with successive generations feeling less and less competent. There are a lot of fingers getting pointed in a variety of directions, some of them being of the "kids these days" variety (which goes back at least to the ancient Greeks complaining that the new generation gulps their food and don't listen to their elders), and others blaming absentee parents not modeling parenting skills, instead leaving it to hired sitters and media (TV was already being complained about when I was a teen, but increasingly it's the Internet).
But there's also the issue of expectation creep, some of it social-services driven, and some of it media-driven (particularly how families are portrayed in contemporary-setting sitcoms), creating unrealistic expectation for perfection. Even fifty years ago, expectations were pretty basic: adequate food, clothing, housing and healthcare, and reasonable level of control over the children's behavior. We were routinely told to go out and play in the yard, with the understanding that we stayed out of the road, stayed away from active farm operations (we grew up on a working farm), and didn't climb the windmill. Mom might do housework, or read, or rest, but nobody would expect her to go out and do nothing but watch us play, ready to swoop in if anything were amiss. Now parents who just send their children to play in the yard are having Child Protective Services called on them.
So it's probably not a huge wonder that more and more young parents are feeling anxious and uncertain about their own parenting skills and performance -- and advice from older parents with experience will be useful, particularly reassurance that children are actually pretty resilient, and a certain amount of small hurts in childhood help to produce an adult who's able to deal with crashing disappointments.
My response is predicated on parsing the title as a portmaneau of "cosplay" and "parenting," and draws upon the discussion of people feeling as if they're just LARPing their way through life.
Imposter syndrome is real, and it seems as if it's actively getting worse, with successive generations feeling less and less competent. There are a lot of fingers getting pointed in a variety of directions, some of them being of the "kids these days" variety (which goes back at least to the ancient Greeks complaining that the new generation gulps their food and don't listen to their elders), and others blaming absentee parents not modeling parenting skills, instead leaving it to hired sitters and media (TV was already being complained about when I was a teen, but increasingly it's the Internet).
But there's also the issue of expectation creep, some of it social-services driven, and some of it media-driven (particularly how families are portrayed in contemporary-setting sitcoms), creating unrealistic expectation for perfection. Even fifty years ago, expectations were pretty basic: adequate food, clothing, housing and healthcare, and reasonable level of control over the children's behavior. We were routinely told to go out and play in the yard, with the understanding that we stayed out of the road, stayed away from active farm operations (we grew up on a working farm), and didn't climb the windmill. Mom might do housework, or read, or rest, but nobody would expect her to go out and do nothing but watch us play, ready to swoop in if anything were amiss. Now parents who just send their children to play in the yard are having Child Protective Services called on them.
So it's probably not a huge wonder that more and more young parents are feeling anxious and uncertain about their own parenting skills and performance -- and advice from older parents with experience will be useful, particularly reassurance that children are actually pretty resilient, and a certain amount of small hurts in childhood help to produce an adult who's able to deal with crashing disappointments.