(no subject)
i feel so fucking lost and lonely.i feel like there are a million things spinning around my head and i just cannot make sense of any of them. i wish i had someone to help me make sense of of all of this. i just want someone to hold me and tell me that everything is ok and really mean it. i want to not feel like this anymore, like i am shaking inside and constantly on the verge of tears when i am not with my friends. i will feel like this until i go smoke, then i will go outside into the beautiful day and somehow feel better. i will wonder if it is the sunshine or the weed that does this to me. i feel like i am going to end up an old ass woman all alone with her cats and her pin cushion collection. i feel like every part of me is twitching in anticipation for nothing. i feel just paralyzed by my own thoughts. i feel crippled beyond movement. i just sit here shaking,and for what? i accomplish nothing by just sitting here and i just need something, and i dont know what. nothing makes it slow down anymore.