[what'd you think about when you sold me out?]
i can't stand this anymore.
i'm just tired. tired of dealing with everything / everybody.
there's so much i want to say to so many people. and it's shitty to have me second guessing the things i should or shouldn't say because of the drama it may or may not create.
the other day i heard someone telling someone else all about how they'd "been in the "scene" longer" than someone else. i withheld my urges to put said person in their place about things, and just thought it was kind of sad that this is what our "scene" has turned into.
on top of the fact that it's already a fucking fashion show of who can have the best clothes/hair/etc, now we have people basically trying to claim "scene" points.
let's lay it out.
i've been going to shows since i was 13 years old.
i've seen at least 10 venues come and go, in the charleston area alone.
i played with thursday, in front of about 40 kids.
i saw fall out boy play to 15 kids that didn't give a shit about them.
i've spent more nights in vans and on more hardwood floors than i could ever recall.
i've played shows for 1 person, 1000 persons, and everything in between.
i'm probally friends with, and have phone numbers for all those guys in bands you think are "so fucking hot."
and what does it mean?
...absolutly fucking nothing.
punk rock, and all genres derived from it is not supposed to be a fashion show. it is not a drama club. it's not how you dress, who you're friends with, where you work, or what shows you do / don't attend.
it's a way of thinking. a way of life, if you will. when i see shirts at fucking hot topic with "punk rock" across the front in pink shiny glitter, it makes me sick. i'm not even trying to be elitist, i just don't need all the bullshit that comes with it.
i do not, and never will understand kids that goto shows, pay to get in, and then talk to their friends as if a band isn't even playing. it just... doesn't make sense. and i've never seen it anywhere else.
and you wonder why bands never come here, and why the bands that you want to see that are FROM here never want to play here.
what am i trying to say, exactly? i can't help feeling like i need some new friends. here's something that may be a hard concept for just about every one of you reading this to grasp.... your "friends" are all talking shit on you. our "scene" and our "group" (and i use "group" to mean all the kids around us & scenes that always hang out together) has become a fucking drama club. it's BEEN a fucking drama club, and i tried to keep my mouth shut. i tried to not let it bother me. even after getting dragged (kicking and screaming) into it, on more than one occasion.
if something doesn't directly involve you, you probally shouldn't worry about it.
there is a HUGE difference between "looking out for someone" and invading someone's fucking privacy. (this would include, but is not limited to: breaking into / reading someone's email, ims, livejournal, myspace, as well as questioning people you don't even know about someone or someone's behavior in a situation and environment in which you were not even present.)
so that's it, kids. i'm done.
don't bring your scene politics drama bullshit around me.. because i just don't care. if you want my opinion on something, ask. but don't get pissed off when/if you don't like what you hear.
and if you've sold, or are currently selling me out... don't think i don't know. i might play dumb, but i assure you i'm far from it. your actions (and your obvious position on friendships vs. someone of the opposite sex) speak louder than any lines you could ever try to give me. i hope you're happy.
it's funny. just when i thought i didn't have anything to write about or complain about anymore, i got a fucking laundry list of them. i'm starting a revolution.. and you're not invited. but local joe is.
i'm just tired. tired of dealing with everything / everybody.
there's so much i want to say to so many people. and it's shitty to have me second guessing the things i should or shouldn't say because of the drama it may or may not create.
the other day i heard someone telling someone else all about how they'd "been in the "scene" longer" than someone else. i withheld my urges to put said person in their place about things, and just thought it was kind of sad that this is what our "scene" has turned into.
on top of the fact that it's already a fucking fashion show of who can have the best clothes/hair/etc, now we have people basically trying to claim "scene" points.
let's lay it out.
i've been going to shows since i was 13 years old.
i've seen at least 10 venues come and go, in the charleston area alone.
i played with thursday, in front of about 40 kids.
i saw fall out boy play to 15 kids that didn't give a shit about them.
i've spent more nights in vans and on more hardwood floors than i could ever recall.
i've played shows for 1 person, 1000 persons, and everything in between.
i'm probally friends with, and have phone numbers for all those guys in bands you think are "so fucking hot."
and what does it mean?
...absolutly fucking nothing.
punk rock, and all genres derived from it is not supposed to be a fashion show. it is not a drama club. it's not how you dress, who you're friends with, where you work, or what shows you do / don't attend.
it's a way of thinking. a way of life, if you will. when i see shirts at fucking hot topic with "punk rock" across the front in pink shiny glitter, it makes me sick. i'm not even trying to be elitist, i just don't need all the bullshit that comes with it.
i do not, and never will understand kids that goto shows, pay to get in, and then talk to their friends as if a band isn't even playing. it just... doesn't make sense. and i've never seen it anywhere else.
and you wonder why bands never come here, and why the bands that you want to see that are FROM here never want to play here.
what am i trying to say, exactly? i can't help feeling like i need some new friends. here's something that may be a hard concept for just about every one of you reading this to grasp.... your "friends" are all talking shit on you. our "scene" and our "group" (and i use "group" to mean all the kids around us & scenes that always hang out together) has become a fucking drama club. it's BEEN a fucking drama club, and i tried to keep my mouth shut. i tried to not let it bother me. even after getting dragged (kicking and screaming) into it, on more than one occasion.
if something doesn't directly involve you, you probally shouldn't worry about it.
there is a HUGE difference between "looking out for someone" and invading someone's fucking privacy. (this would include, but is not limited to: breaking into / reading someone's email, ims, livejournal, myspace, as well as questioning people you don't even know about someone or someone's behavior in a situation and environment in which you were not even present.)
so that's it, kids. i'm done.
don't bring your scene politics drama bullshit around me.. because i just don't care. if you want my opinion on something, ask. but don't get pissed off when/if you don't like what you hear.
and if you've sold, or are currently selling me out... don't think i don't know. i might play dumb, but i assure you i'm far from it. your actions (and your obvious position on friendships vs. someone of the opposite sex) speak louder than any lines you could ever try to give me. i hope you're happy.
it's funny. just when i thought i didn't have anything to write about or complain about anymore, i got a fucking laundry list of them. i'm starting a revolution.. and you're not invited. but local joe is.