(no subject)
so it is starting to rain outside. this reminds me of home. the rain, the cold air, sweatshirts, sweaters, and corderoy pants. sleeping with the window open when it is freezing outside, sleeping under lots of covers and sleeping soundly. today, i was alone for the majority of the day, slaving away on this computer trying to get a new job, posting my resumè everywhere, and applying a few places. unfortunately, i am allowing this down time get to me. its beginning to make me feel empty, useless, and like a big loser. hopefully, something will come up and i will be back on my feet again. hopefully, i will be blessed with a great job - something stable, something with permanence, something that is not a hostile situation like my last job. i've only been out of work for 2 days, but i hate this feeling. i've never felt it before though, maybe its because i have tons of bills, its also probably because i finally got into a routine of work, and then it broke because of a psychotic boss. my life is the exception to all rules and incidents and i don't know how to change it nor do i know how to cope with it. all i know is that i need the Lord to fill me up, give me peace, and provide me with an excellent job that i can begin to save money, not live month to month, and be better prepared for 9 months from now. *sigh* please pray that God opens up a door. after i write this, i will be emailing a hiring agency that julie referred me too and hopefully i will be shown to a job very soon.
bud and i are still doing fabulous. i love him so much and i'm blessed everyday by him. we have had little to no conflict lately, and i am getting used to it. not that we fought a lot or were in constant conflict, because what relationship doesn't have its disagreements. but what i mean is the fact that we have had no fights recently, just more and more love, more and more affection, more and more staring into each other's eyes and seeing that love we have for each other. i guess we were in a dry spell, but that must have passed. praise the Lord. if you have ever loved a person as much as i love bud, then you can understand and appreciate it when dry spells run their course and the passion and magic return in all its glory. :) its a wonderful, fulfilling, heart warming experience. thank you Lord for the blessing that my fiance is. i do not deserve the blessings that i have, nor do i deserve to even be living right now, but i am glad that i am. despite the problems with my job and the chaos of not having a lot of money, knowing that bud loves me regardless of my situations, knowing that God has it this way to help me grow and lean on him in my times of struggle. Lord, thank you for trials and tribulations, just help me get through it without hurting myself, hurting anyone, and help me to stay in your presence.
*sigh* i am so tired but if i go to bed, what do i have to wake up in the morning for? more job hunting. its real depressing and it gets kind of tedious. but alas, i probably should go to bed. so i guess thats what i will be doing. so goodnight to you all, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite. i love you all. talk to you soon. grace&peace. bye.
- christin joy.
bud and i are still doing fabulous. i love him so much and i'm blessed everyday by him. we have had little to no conflict lately, and i am getting used to it. not that we fought a lot or were in constant conflict, because what relationship doesn't have its disagreements. but what i mean is the fact that we have had no fights recently, just more and more love, more and more affection, more and more staring into each other's eyes and seeing that love we have for each other. i guess we were in a dry spell, but that must have passed. praise the Lord. if you have ever loved a person as much as i love bud, then you can understand and appreciate it when dry spells run their course and the passion and magic return in all its glory. :) its a wonderful, fulfilling, heart warming experience. thank you Lord for the blessing that my fiance is. i do not deserve the blessings that i have, nor do i deserve to even be living right now, but i am glad that i am. despite the problems with my job and the chaos of not having a lot of money, knowing that bud loves me regardless of my situations, knowing that God has it this way to help me grow and lean on him in my times of struggle. Lord, thank you for trials and tribulations, just help me get through it without hurting myself, hurting anyone, and help me to stay in your presence.
*sigh* i am so tired but if i go to bed, what do i have to wake up in the morning for? more job hunting. its real depressing and it gets kind of tedious. but alas, i probably should go to bed. so i guess thats what i will be doing. so goodnight to you all, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite. i love you all. talk to you soon. grace&peace. bye.
- christin joy.