Randome Blow-by-Blow: 2007 Oscars
Man, I never did write up my reactions to the nominations did I? I am one lazy-ass sheep. Anyway, on with the show...
- To start with, the reception on our TV was shit (either because it's an old set, all our channels below six look like hell, or both, I don't know). And I missed half the opening montage because I was working the espresso machine. Fortunately they have it online, so I watched the whole thing later. I love stuff like that.
- I approve of Ellen not wearing black. The white shoes were meh, though.
- Adriana Barraza looked GORGEOUS. That necklace she was wearing? Oh, man. And I bet she had to give it back, too. I would have begged to keep it for the sole purpose of being able to stare at it and *sigh*.
- I have an idea: let's bring back Chris Rock, and let him have his fangs, as it were, or something; Ellen's seeming a little awkward. But maybe that's just her style.
- Abigail Breslin looks so cute.
- LMAO, Al Gore joke FTW -- and he looked amused as hell, too. Good sport.
- Meanwhile, Scorsese's looking kinda bored.
- Oh yikes. Cue the obligatory musical number. At least it was short. And Ellen didn't sing.
- That poof on Nicole Kidman's shoulder = very unattractive, IMHO.
- Whee I spotted Jodie Foster in the audience! I love her.
- Sucked that the Art Direction chick didn't get to say anything. Man, the orchestra were rather rude all night, IMHO. And the director kept giving them really weird abrupt cut-offs.
- Who the hell were the two backstage announcer people? I'd never heard of them before. Where was Peter Coyote?
- And what the hell was with Will Ferrell's hair? He looked like he stole it from the Sixth Doctor. But LMAO Jack Black, and John C. Reilly coming out of the audience, and them not threatening to beat up Mark Wahlberg because he's badass, and the references to Jeremy Irons, James Spader, and Helen Mirren.
- How cute is it to have Abigail Breslin and Jaden Smith presenting for the Best Short awards? Will and Jada looked like they wanted to burst with happiness.
- West Bank Story looks like it is made of WIN.
- OMG it's the Oscars again, Jack Nicholson's back with his shit-eating grin! ...But where's his hair?
- Hee Steven Spielberg sitting next to Clint Eastwood's wife.
- The Sound Effects Choir? Holy shit. My brain wanted to explode with awesome.
- I love you, Greg Kinnear. Did anyone else lose sound during his joke? (Well, I guess so judging from his next comment, sounds like it was staged that way.)
- JAMES MCAVOY HEEEEEEEEE. Please feel free to speak at me aaaaaall niiiiiight loooooong.
- I am just not impressed by Jessica Biel. And her dress could stand to be improved by removing that godawful black belt.
- DAMN the Sound Mixing guys have racked up some nominations between the lot of them.
- I hate Rachel Weisz for being so damn beautiful.
- FUCK I wanted Jackie Earle Haley to win Best Supporting Actor so damn bad.
- Dammit, hosts in the aisle again (I thought we'd decided to abolish that after that one year with the presenters in the aisles, which was lame as hell). Why is Ellen randomly interviewing people, and why do things keep magically appearing in her hand?
- Randy Newman owns you.
- Two songs one after the other? I thought they liked to space them out. And look, propaganda on a screen behind Melissa Etheridge. Nice. /sarcasm
- LMAO Leonardo DiCaprio and Al Gore?! And haha, they used the word 'thrice' for Leo.
- Okay, the announcement joke with Gore ended up going kinda lame, but I still grinned... it was like Leo was all OMFG PLEASE RUN FOR PRESIDENT I BEG YOU.
- Hooray obligatory shot of Nicholson grinning.
- Not loving the bottom of Cameron Diaz's dress. Also, it looks like she went a bit too heavy with the fake and bake.
- Hee Happy Feet won! That makes me happy.
- But shots of CG characters in the audience are lame.
- I saw you there, George Lucas.
- Love how Ben Affleck got introduced as "Academy Award-winning screenwriter". That cracked me up.
- Aw the winner for Best Adapted Screenplay. He seems genuine. I love that he was freaked out by being at the same Oscars as Peter O'Toole.
- Tom Hanks: "More fun, you bet!" Drive-by fakeness! (Don't blame him, though.)
- Who the hell is Emily Blunt?
- Lame-ass The Devil Wears Prada jokes, but that last look Meryl Streep gave was hilarious.
- Hello living costume tableau? Weird.
- I think Marie Antoinette deserved the Best Costumes Oscar.
- Dude, I want Sherry Lansing's dress. (Was she reading off a teleprompter?)
- Argh, Ellen in the audience again. But ROFL Clint Eastwood wanting a script, and double LMAO Spielberg taking the Myspace pictures.
- Aw, Gwyneth Paltrow's dress is pretty! Unconventional, I think, but pretty. Though what is with all the long hair being brushed over one shoulder? I don't really like it.
- Haha self-deprecating Robert Downey, Jr.
- Naomi Watts' dress strikes me as being too... I dunno, droopy up top. At any rate, it almost looks like it's about to slide right off.
- Is it just me or has Beyonce been looking really fake all night?
- O HAY Ken Watanabe *drool*
- Still not impressed by Clive Owen. (Though I still want to see Children of Men.)
- Holy shit, Pan's Labyrinth didn't win Best Foreign Film! Damn.
- Ellen's shadow puppetry was lame, but the ensuing Snakes on a Plane-ness was kinda awesome. Actually, I think all the shadow puppetry was rather superfluous.
- "They're naked." LMAO
- George Clooney has somehow succeeded in winning me over to his love train. Just thought I'd say that.
- Rinko Kikuchi is so cute.
- Jennifer Hudson you lucky bitch, you get your Oscar handed to you by Clooney! I loved her speech; no fakness about it at all. Though after reading this one post on ohnotheydidnt, the Jennifer Holliday shoutout made me laugh.
- Oooh Eva Green's dress. Though Eva Green herself looked a little scary.
- Jerry Seinfeld? What? (No, I hadn't been wondering where you'd gone.)
- Who the hell nominated Jesus Camp?!
- Dude, Ennio Morricone getting a special Oscar. (So when's John Williams getting one of those bitches?) I squeed when the music from The Mission was played.
- What was the point of the song Celine Dion sang, other than it was written by Morricone? I was a little confused.
- Clint Eastwood being all "I shoulda worn my glasses" = major ROFL.
- Dammit, did anyone else have that GM commercial with the sad robot arm played on their station? It makes me fucking CRY. But when I was all "wait, that wasn't the ending I saw", Eric informed me that GM was forced to scrap the ending with the robot jumping off a bridge because people got pissed about it. Heh.
- HAY HUGH JACKMAN.
- Why did I think Philip Glass was dead?
- I think Kirsten Dunst's dress might have been pretty, if not for the bizarre top to it.
- But I want Beyonce's dress. Anika Noni Rose's, too.
- Whoa, Dreamgirls lost out thrice for Best Song. Loved Melissa thanking Tammy.
- Fuck, what was that music being played at the beginning of the "America in film" montage? Anyone know? Because it was really damn familiar but I can't place it.
- I'll take Kate Winslet's dress too plzkthnx
- Dude, was Scorsese crying during Thelma Schoonmaker's speech?
- Damn, Jodie Foster looks good.
- Philip Seymour Hoffman--comb your hair. Also, "Hi." = ROFL.
- We totally knew Helen Mirren was going to win!
- WTF Ellen and the vacuum cleaner? But LMAO throwing the rolling paper to the orchestra.
- FOREST WHITAKER FOR THE FUCKING WIN!
- LOLOLOLOLOLOL George Lucas getting pwned by Steven Spielberg and Francis Ford Coppola. "No it isn't!" Hee. :D
- Also, I call bullshit on no one knowing who was going to win Best Director until the envelope was opened. They totally got the triumvirate up there because they knew Scorsese was going to win.
- Why the hell has Jack Nicholson been hanging out in the wings for forever? (Eric: "They probably let him do whatever.") Okay, wait, he's presenting for Best Picture.
- Is Diane Keaton on speed? Or alcohol?
- Hee, backstage Spielberg's all "look at you!" to Scorsese
- And hey, Carrie Fisher was one of the writers! Yay.
Until next year!
- To start with, the reception on our TV was shit (either because it's an old set, all our channels below six look like hell, or both, I don't know). And I missed half the opening montage because I was working the espresso machine. Fortunately they have it online, so I watched the whole thing later. I love stuff like that.
- I approve of Ellen not wearing black. The white shoes were meh, though.
- Adriana Barraza looked GORGEOUS. That necklace she was wearing? Oh, man. And I bet she had to give it back, too. I would have begged to keep it for the sole purpose of being able to stare at it and *sigh*.
- I have an idea: let's bring back Chris Rock, and let him have his fangs, as it were, or something; Ellen's seeming a little awkward. But maybe that's just her style.
- Abigail Breslin looks so cute.
- LMAO, Al Gore joke FTW -- and he looked amused as hell, too. Good sport.
- Meanwhile, Scorsese's looking kinda bored.
- Oh yikes. Cue the obligatory musical number. At least it was short. And Ellen didn't sing.
- That poof on Nicole Kidman's shoulder = very unattractive, IMHO.
- Whee I spotted Jodie Foster in the audience! I love her.
- Sucked that the Art Direction chick didn't get to say anything. Man, the orchestra were rather rude all night, IMHO. And the director kept giving them really weird abrupt cut-offs.
- Who the hell were the two backstage announcer people? I'd never heard of them before. Where was Peter Coyote?
- And what the hell was with Will Ferrell's hair? He looked like he stole it from the Sixth Doctor. But LMAO Jack Black, and John C. Reilly coming out of the audience, and them not threatening to beat up Mark Wahlberg because he's badass, and the references to Jeremy Irons, James Spader, and Helen Mirren.
- How cute is it to have Abigail Breslin and Jaden Smith presenting for the Best Short awards? Will and Jada looked like they wanted to burst with happiness.
- West Bank Story looks like it is made of WIN.
- OMG it's the Oscars again, Jack Nicholson's back with his shit-eating grin! ...But where's his hair?
- Hee Steven Spielberg sitting next to Clint Eastwood's wife.
- The Sound Effects Choir? Holy shit. My brain wanted to explode with awesome.
- I love you, Greg Kinnear. Did anyone else lose sound during his joke? (Well, I guess so judging from his next comment, sounds like it was staged that way.)
- JAMES MCAVOY HEEEEEEEEE. Please feel free to speak at me aaaaaall niiiiiight loooooong.
- I am just not impressed by Jessica Biel. And her dress could stand to be improved by removing that godawful black belt.
- DAMN the Sound Mixing guys have racked up some nominations between the lot of them.
- I hate Rachel Weisz for being so damn beautiful.
- FUCK I wanted Jackie Earle Haley to win Best Supporting Actor so damn bad.
- Dammit, hosts in the aisle again (I thought we'd decided to abolish that after that one year with the presenters in the aisles, which was lame as hell). Why is Ellen randomly interviewing people, and why do things keep magically appearing in her hand?
- Randy Newman owns you.
- Two songs one after the other? I thought they liked to space them out. And look, propaganda on a screen behind Melissa Etheridge. Nice. /sarcasm
- LMAO Leonardo DiCaprio and Al Gore?! And haha, they used the word 'thrice' for Leo.
- Okay, the announcement joke with Gore ended up going kinda lame, but I still grinned... it was like Leo was all OMFG PLEASE RUN FOR PRESIDENT I BEG YOU.
- Hooray obligatory shot of Nicholson grinning.
- Not loving the bottom of Cameron Diaz's dress. Also, it looks like she went a bit too heavy with the fake and bake.
- Hee Happy Feet won! That makes me happy.
- But shots of CG characters in the audience are lame.
- I saw you there, George Lucas.
- Love how Ben Affleck got introduced as "Academy Award-winning screenwriter". That cracked me up.
- Aw the winner for Best Adapted Screenplay. He seems genuine. I love that he was freaked out by being at the same Oscars as Peter O'Toole.
- Tom Hanks: "More fun, you bet!" Drive-by fakeness! (Don't blame him, though.)
- Who the hell is Emily Blunt?
- Lame-ass The Devil Wears Prada jokes, but that last look Meryl Streep gave was hilarious.
- Hello living costume tableau? Weird.
- I think Marie Antoinette deserved the Best Costumes Oscar.
- Dude, I want Sherry Lansing's dress. (Was she reading off a teleprompter?)
- Argh, Ellen in the audience again. But ROFL Clint Eastwood wanting a script, and double LMAO Spielberg taking the Myspace pictures.
- Aw, Gwyneth Paltrow's dress is pretty! Unconventional, I think, but pretty. Though what is with all the long hair being brushed over one shoulder? I don't really like it.
- Haha self-deprecating Robert Downey, Jr.
- Naomi Watts' dress strikes me as being too... I dunno, droopy up top. At any rate, it almost looks like it's about to slide right off.
- Is it just me or has Beyonce been looking really fake all night?
- O HAY Ken Watanabe *drool*
- Still not impressed by Clive Owen. (Though I still want to see Children of Men.)
- Holy shit, Pan's Labyrinth didn't win Best Foreign Film! Damn.
- Ellen's shadow puppetry was lame, but the ensuing Snakes on a Plane-ness was kinda awesome. Actually, I think all the shadow puppetry was rather superfluous.
- "They're naked." LMAO
- George Clooney has somehow succeeded in winning me over to his love train. Just thought I'd say that.
- Rinko Kikuchi is so cute.
- Jennifer Hudson you lucky bitch, you get your Oscar handed to you by Clooney! I loved her speech; no fakness about it at all. Though after reading this one post on ohnotheydidnt, the Jennifer Holliday shoutout made me laugh.
- Oooh Eva Green's dress. Though Eva Green herself looked a little scary.
- Jerry Seinfeld? What? (No, I hadn't been wondering where you'd gone.)
- Who the hell nominated Jesus Camp?!
- Dude, Ennio Morricone getting a special Oscar. (So when's John Williams getting one of those bitches?) I squeed when the music from The Mission was played.
- What was the point of the song Celine Dion sang, other than it was written by Morricone? I was a little confused.
- Clint Eastwood being all "I shoulda worn my glasses" = major ROFL.
- Dammit, did anyone else have that GM commercial with the sad robot arm played on their station? It makes me fucking CRY. But when I was all "wait, that wasn't the ending I saw", Eric informed me that GM was forced to scrap the ending with the robot jumping off a bridge because people got pissed about it. Heh.
- HAY HUGH JACKMAN.
- Why did I think Philip Glass was dead?
- I think Kirsten Dunst's dress might have been pretty, if not for the bizarre top to it.
- But I want Beyonce's dress. Anika Noni Rose's, too.
- Whoa, Dreamgirls lost out thrice for Best Song. Loved Melissa thanking Tammy.
- Fuck, what was that music being played at the beginning of the "America in film" montage? Anyone know? Because it was really damn familiar but I can't place it.
- I'll take Kate Winslet's dress too plzkthnx
- Dude, was Scorsese crying during Thelma Schoonmaker's speech?
- Damn, Jodie Foster looks good.
- Philip Seymour Hoffman--comb your hair. Also, "Hi." = ROFL.
- We totally knew Helen Mirren was going to win!
- WTF Ellen and the vacuum cleaner? But LMAO throwing the rolling paper to the orchestra.
- FOREST WHITAKER FOR THE FUCKING WIN!
- LOLOLOLOLOLOL George Lucas getting pwned by Steven Spielberg and Francis Ford Coppola. "No it isn't!" Hee. :D
- Also, I call bullshit on no one knowing who was going to win Best Director until the envelope was opened. They totally got the triumvirate up there because they knew Scorsese was going to win.
- Why the hell has Jack Nicholson been hanging out in the wings for forever? (Eric: "They probably let him do whatever.") Okay, wait, he's presenting for Best Picture.
- Is Diane Keaton on speed? Or alcohol?
- Hee, backstage Spielberg's all "look at you!" to Scorsese
- And hey, Carrie Fisher was one of the writers! Yay.
Until next year!