you said forever.....who knew?
I've been thinking a lot lately, about life, about what has happened, about what's to come.
It seems like I've thought about that a lot lately. I see friends going off and getting married. I see others get engaged. I also see those getting ready to get engaged. And it got me thinking to what it means when you promise "forever" to someone.
It feels like when you're in a relationship, that's obviously a thought in the back of your mind, because why do we date? We date to find someone that we'd like to spend the rest of our life with......to find someone who compliments us and brings out the best in us.
I remember when I believed I had had that with my ex. When both of us had started talking about the possibility of this being it for us.....when both of us thought that forever was with each other. But when you fight in an unhealthy manner with one another, forever certainly seems like a long time to promise......almost like a death sentence.
Forever just seems to be thrown out so casually nowadays, it's hard to believe that there truly is a forever with the person you're with. So it got me thinking: whatever happened to right now? Why is there always a need to start thinking about the long-term goal when right now, there's so much more? This goes back to my previous blog about the need to slow down and enjoy life.
I admit it: I was engaged. Forever was on my mind more than anything, because I knew that was what I wanted. But I was naive to have said yes and believed that forever was with the first person that you love. I was naive to believe that the first person you are intimate with is the perfect person. I was naive in thinking that there wasn't anything better out there for me, that while I may have wanted to be with the person I was with at that moment, that there couldn't possibly be anyone out there that was just a little bit better for me in the long-run. Back then, I just didn't believe it was possible. Forever was forever and I believed it to be true.
But promises are broken, hearts are shattered, and things change. Shit happens. I think about forever now and I know that I'm only 24 (nearing 25).......and forever is definitely a long ways off. I'm enjoying what's here now and that's all I need. I don't need to be concerned with anything else aside from that. I have everything I need right now and forever can wait until I'm ready to share that. Doesn't mean that I'm not thinking about it......it just means that for right now, forever is not as important to me as living in the moment. It's something I had almost overlooked.....and if I had not went through what I did this past year, I may have never understood what it meant.
I know there are people out there who are contemplating their futures with their significant others/people they're dating/people they're interested in/etc........and I'm here to tell you, make SURE you know what you want before you say that you're ready to fully commit to someone for the rest of your life. I know it's a gamble and you can't predict the future, but have fun with the now. Now is the time to just relax and enjoy each other. The future will get here eventually and become the present, but why worry? There are so many other things in life that one should focus on.
Don't make my mistake, even though I learned from it and have gone back to being myself.......embrace everything that you can while you're young and vibrant. You only get so many chances in your life to have fun and make memories.
~Jenn~
It seems like I've thought about that a lot lately. I see friends going off and getting married. I see others get engaged. I also see those getting ready to get engaged. And it got me thinking to what it means when you promise "forever" to someone.
It feels like when you're in a relationship, that's obviously a thought in the back of your mind, because why do we date? We date to find someone that we'd like to spend the rest of our life with......to find someone who compliments us and brings out the best in us.
I remember when I believed I had had that with my ex. When both of us had started talking about the possibility of this being it for us.....when both of us thought that forever was with each other. But when you fight in an unhealthy manner with one another, forever certainly seems like a long time to promise......almost like a death sentence.
Forever just seems to be thrown out so casually nowadays, it's hard to believe that there truly is a forever with the person you're with. So it got me thinking: whatever happened to right now? Why is there always a need to start thinking about the long-term goal when right now, there's so much more? This goes back to my previous blog about the need to slow down and enjoy life.
I admit it: I was engaged. Forever was on my mind more than anything, because I knew that was what I wanted. But I was naive to have said yes and believed that forever was with the first person that you love. I was naive to believe that the first person you are intimate with is the perfect person. I was naive in thinking that there wasn't anything better out there for me, that while I may have wanted to be with the person I was with at that moment, that there couldn't possibly be anyone out there that was just a little bit better for me in the long-run. Back then, I just didn't believe it was possible. Forever was forever and I believed it to be true.
But promises are broken, hearts are shattered, and things change. Shit happens. I think about forever now and I know that I'm only 24 (nearing 25).......and forever is definitely a long ways off. I'm enjoying what's here now and that's all I need. I don't need to be concerned with anything else aside from that. I have everything I need right now and forever can wait until I'm ready to share that. Doesn't mean that I'm not thinking about it......it just means that for right now, forever is not as important to me as living in the moment. It's something I had almost overlooked.....and if I had not went through what I did this past year, I may have never understood what it meant.
I know there are people out there who are contemplating their futures with their significant others/people they're dating/people they're interested in/etc........and I'm here to tell you, make SURE you know what you want before you say that you're ready to fully commit to someone for the rest of your life. I know it's a gamble and you can't predict the future, but have fun with the now. Now is the time to just relax and enjoy each other. The future will get here eventually and become the present, but why worry? There are so many other things in life that one should focus on.
Don't make my mistake, even though I learned from it and have gone back to being myself.......embrace everything that you can while you're young and vibrant. You only get so many chances in your life to have fun and make memories.
~Jenn~