This Sucks!
Okay so the past few days havent been great. yestarday i worked most of the day. I had a break from 1:30-6:30 in that period of time i found out some news... My mom wants to talk to me now. I dont know what is going to happen... I hate how people think i'll forget about it. you cant just forget about 2 and 1/2 years of hurt. I love my mother to death. There were so many times i wanted to hate her because of everything but i couldnt... shes the one who brought me into this world. She raised me to be the person i am today. I could never disown her or hate her because she is my flesh and blood. I was shocked to hear that she wanted to talk to me again. I feel like crying from happiness... No one really understands what it is like for me to experience this... right now i just need somone to be there and help me out with this... i was hysterical for about a 1/2 hour after i found this out. i want someone to be here with me and hold me while i cry... i called a friend that i thought would help but it didnt happen. All of you with families and your significant others that you turn to have no idea what its like to be alone on this fucking scary ass world without someone who cares helping you. you wonder why i dont say "hey can i come along?" its because i feel like a 3rd wheel. I just want to be loved... you complain about siblings and parents getting down your backs but yet you do not know the sting of not seeing you brothers or sisters only 4-5 times a year... and talking to them infrequently... i didnt have a parent at graduation... i had staff and my two brothers.... Now i dont even have my siblings... they're all adopted. i feel so alone now... not only i away from the one place i called home for 2 years but i have lost friends.... im always calling my friends.... they only time they really call me is when i call and leave a message and its basically a return call... i need to go... i cant stand this anymore. if you want to get ahold of me i may not be around to contact...