Coming and going friendships
Some friends we know will be in our lives forever. I call those women my bridesmaid friends and those men, my boys. But what about those we sometimes let fade?
For a long time I have had a person in my life who has been so very important to me. I had, in the past, turned to this person for support and advice and have also maintained an active interest in their life. Unfortunately, as lives shift and shape, the friend and I lost touch, our relationship changed and we drifted apart. Recently, I found myself overcome with questions about my relationship with this person and what I had gotten from it and what I would get from it if I continued to make attempts at reconnecting.
For me, changes are an especially difficult idea and I find I don't phase them well. Just like my change to graduate school, I found that I didn't keep up with many people that I wanted to, that our lives were different, we didn't have as much in common. Thank God for AIM, so I can still know they're alive. And I often wondered, what would happen if I just sent that person a card--just to let them know I was thinking about them? I usually talk myself out of it because I know they may find it odd, especially if we weren't incredibly close. But still, the hole in my heart, however small or large, is there. And I miss them. And I miss the time we had together.
So, the friend. Another friend of mine once likened relationships to two circles--you sometimes move in and out of anothers life, coming in when you need each other most, moving out for the relationship and friends to grow and change. I want to apply this to my rapidly-becoming long-lost friend, to believe that our lives will touch again, that my friend will someday become the person I remember and love (or perhaps that I will again become the person that could love that friend) but here, I know there is a higher possibility I must let go.
Perhaps then we are meant to meet some people for a moment and spend the rest of our lives being grateful for that time. Perhaps we should make one last attempt to reestablish that friendship. Perhaps.
For a long time I have had a person in my life who has been so very important to me. I had, in the past, turned to this person for support and advice and have also maintained an active interest in their life. Unfortunately, as lives shift and shape, the friend and I lost touch, our relationship changed and we drifted apart. Recently, I found myself overcome with questions about my relationship with this person and what I had gotten from it and what I would get from it if I continued to make attempts at reconnecting.
For me, changes are an especially difficult idea and I find I don't phase them well. Just like my change to graduate school, I found that I didn't keep up with many people that I wanted to, that our lives were different, we didn't have as much in common. Thank God for AIM, so I can still know they're alive. And I often wondered, what would happen if I just sent that person a card--just to let them know I was thinking about them? I usually talk myself out of it because I know they may find it odd, especially if we weren't incredibly close. But still, the hole in my heart, however small or large, is there. And I miss them. And I miss the time we had together.
So, the friend. Another friend of mine once likened relationships to two circles--you sometimes move in and out of anothers life, coming in when you need each other most, moving out for the relationship and friends to grow and change. I want to apply this to my rapidly-becoming long-lost friend, to believe that our lives will touch again, that my friend will someday become the person I remember and love (or perhaps that I will again become the person that could love that friend) but here, I know there is a higher possibility I must let go.
Perhaps then we are meant to meet some people for a moment and spend the rest of our lives being grateful for that time. Perhaps we should make one last attempt to reestablish that friendship. Perhaps.