Im over getting older...but i dont want to waste another minute here.
Hi LJ long time no talk. dude i turned the big 22. i dont know what it is, but it was a trillion times less exciting then it usually is. I got a new piercing, loveee it.
I actually think this is the longest ever i have gone without updating something at least. this is going to be the forth update since the fucking summer started and i graduated. ugh theres that word again. so there has been so much change in the last few months im amazed im handeling anything.
I have spent the whole summer making no money at arena. Im like so done there. LOL while in the shower i swore i had things to talk about on here.
Life at home, is well shitty. as im interrupted by her....
anyway. I look forward to leaving, but really its hard out there. the question is it it harder in here. mentaly probably.
I didnt have a computer for a little while because well, she went on a rampage and threw it. she paid for the repair and costs of my harddrive and i doubled my space. could be worse I guess. I at least have somebody that someday will take me away from here.
so the summer was a little drab. just a little. but the autumn is jam packed so there ya go. it works out.
the other thing is im really unhappy with my body. i love food, but i wanna be thin. its a struggle. especially because well i work at pathmark and i ring up and think about food like all day! and when you buy food at work its pretty much a community snack. especially sunday and tuesday nights. all this food talk is making me hungary. i hate the way my body works too. It drives me crazy.
maybe i should go to the gym tonight. I freckan pay for it every month, but i have no energy or motivation to go on a regular basis.
maybe i should just cancel it. arg. I need something to do when everybody else is in school.
and i have to find my self a new job.
so i think i decided to update this thing everyday and use it the way i used to use it. I also thing im going to post my goals for the day and such. lol lets see how long that lasts. I used to be much more attached to writing here then i am now, i dont know if thats just lazyness or a maturing thing, but as i grow older i need this more and more to keep in touch with my past and myself. I forget and block alot of things that i need to remember.
I need to start taking care of my skin too. i have all the shit... astringent, pore minimizer, black head treatment, pore strips, anti- oil treatments... I did it all today and omg my skinburnnned but it was a good burn.
damn im rambling. sorrys.
ready for this.. how i feel about my hair... i dont like it, i need a makeover. i want to die it, but i want to grow out my natural hair color, but i cant stand the two color thing i have going on. i like it long, and i like growing it but i need a cut. awesome right.
ok im going to go, think about hitting the gym, then work and prolly hanging out with Robert. ok people. will be in touchh.
I actually think this is the longest ever i have gone without updating something at least. this is going to be the forth update since the fucking summer started and i graduated. ugh theres that word again. so there has been so much change in the last few months im amazed im handeling anything.
I have spent the whole summer making no money at arena. Im like so done there. LOL while in the shower i swore i had things to talk about on here.
Life at home, is well shitty. as im interrupted by her....
anyway. I look forward to leaving, but really its hard out there. the question is it it harder in here. mentaly probably.
I didnt have a computer for a little while because well, she went on a rampage and threw it. she paid for the repair and costs of my harddrive and i doubled my space. could be worse I guess. I at least have somebody that someday will take me away from here.
so the summer was a little drab. just a little. but the autumn is jam packed so there ya go. it works out.
the other thing is im really unhappy with my body. i love food, but i wanna be thin. its a struggle. especially because well i work at pathmark and i ring up and think about food like all day! and when you buy food at work its pretty much a community snack. especially sunday and tuesday nights. all this food talk is making me hungary. i hate the way my body works too. It drives me crazy.
maybe i should go to the gym tonight. I freckan pay for it every month, but i have no energy or motivation to go on a regular basis.
maybe i should just cancel it. arg. I need something to do when everybody else is in school.
and i have to find my self a new job.
so i think i decided to update this thing everyday and use it the way i used to use it. I also thing im going to post my goals for the day and such. lol lets see how long that lasts. I used to be much more attached to writing here then i am now, i dont know if thats just lazyness or a maturing thing, but as i grow older i need this more and more to keep in touch with my past and myself. I forget and block alot of things that i need to remember.
I need to start taking care of my skin too. i have all the shit... astringent, pore minimizer, black head treatment, pore strips, anti- oil treatments... I did it all today and omg my skinburnnned but it was a good burn.
damn im rambling. sorrys.
ready for this.. how i feel about my hair... i dont like it, i need a makeover. i want to die it, but i want to grow out my natural hair color, but i cant stand the two color thing i have going on. i like it long, and i like growing it but i need a cut. awesome right.
ok im going to go, think about hitting the gym, then work and prolly hanging out with Robert. ok people. will be in touchh.