still shitty...
apartment not going so well.. apparently we have shitty credit and they want to jack up the sec. deposit 675 dollars... womt be able to make that much by the move in date. i'm bummed. so lindsays been calling nick on her way home to work. all of a sudden he just wanders into the bedroom and talks quietly. i'm kinda bummed about it. i think he doesn't ever want to work it out. i think he just wants the newer better hotter younger thing. this definately does nothing for my self esteem. lately i've been screwed up. seriously. i'm glad no one really reads this because i need to vent. so the past week and a half i haven't exactly had healthy eating habits. there's some days i dont eat at all, then there's others i just eat and throw it back up. so far i'm at 173. down from 191 in april. not bad i guess. still feel like a fat ass. it's not like anyone else says otherwise. i just want to be normal. who knows. i guess i'll just sit here until nick gets off the phone with her and drink myself asleep with some couch syrup. tootles
Peaceout
Peaceout