messed up.
things are so crazy. i feel so empty.
aarons rental wants to take my laptop because i'm three months behind in payments.
if my stepfather had actually paid for my 'graduation gift' and not made me pay after he left my mom, this wouldn't be happening.
nonetheless, i need this laptop but i don't have the money to pay for it.
i was thinking of asking my father & stepmom to borrow money, or maybe even track down my shithead of a stepdad and ask for some help. but i have never asked to borrow money before. i don't know if i should.
i still need a job. i've been searching up and down and i've applied at a lot of places. i've checked in with places too.. they all say they'll get ahold of me but never do. i'm really hoping applebee's will work out. or movie gallery. gahhhh.
between being in debt, not having a job or license, and being far from kenn and my gorham loves.. i just feel so shitty. :[
i cry all the time, and sleep as much as possible. i don't like being this depressed. this isn't who i am.
one good thing though, is i started hanging out with amy again. she is such a ball of fuckin' joy. we spend a lot of time at her boyfriends apartment. him and his roommate, chad are so much fun. basically, we smoke and play mario party and we cook big fancy dinners for them and dress up. haha.
i guess i just gotta keep on trying with jobs...
it can just get so discouraging.
aarons rental wants to take my laptop because i'm three months behind in payments.
if my stepfather had actually paid for my 'graduation gift' and not made me pay after he left my mom, this wouldn't be happening.
nonetheless, i need this laptop but i don't have the money to pay for it.
i was thinking of asking my father & stepmom to borrow money, or maybe even track down my shithead of a stepdad and ask for some help. but i have never asked to borrow money before. i don't know if i should.
i still need a job. i've been searching up and down and i've applied at a lot of places. i've checked in with places too.. they all say they'll get ahold of me but never do. i'm really hoping applebee's will work out. or movie gallery. gahhhh.
between being in debt, not having a job or license, and being far from kenn and my gorham loves.. i just feel so shitty. :[
i cry all the time, and sleep as much as possible. i don't like being this depressed. this isn't who i am.
one good thing though, is i started hanging out with amy again. she is such a ball of fuckin' joy. we spend a lot of time at her boyfriends apartment. him and his roommate, chad are so much fun. basically, we smoke and play mario party and we cook big fancy dinners for them and dress up. haha.
i guess i just gotta keep on trying with jobs...
it can just get so discouraging.