I suck at XC again
*sigh*
That's the only way to describe how I feel right now. I feel like my xc year might just have gone down the toilet. I was so excited. Today was our first meet of the season. It was for top 7 only. I finally got into the top 7 this year and I got to run in the meet. I've never gotten to be able to run in the top 7 before. I've never run this meet before. That was my first goal: make it to meet #1. So I made that goal. Goal 2: do totally awesome at meet #1... I failed that one. Right now I'm about 4 or 5 on the team. That's amazing for me. I've never been that good before. I've been working really hard this year, running on all the off days. So today at the meet I was expecting to get 4th place... maybe 5th place on our team (not overall of course). Well yesterday these killer stomach aches hit. They have gotten better, but haven't gone away. I have no idea what they are and nothing seems to make them better (advil, tylenol, pepcid ac... nothing works). They don't seem to want to give up. Still though, press on. I didn't tell Carney, I'm not a complainer. I ran in the race anyways instead of giving up my spot and letting the altnerate run. There was no way I was gonna give up after I had finally made it to that meet. I got 27:01... freaking 27:01 and I was shooting for the 24s... maybe low 24s. And I'm so pissed at myself because I KNOW I can do a hell of a lot better than what I did today. I'm afraid that today's failure will cause me to lose heart though. I came in last for our team and I'm so afraid that my stomach won't get better.
The only good thing about today was that I got to see Max just briefly while at the meet. Hickory was running today too and as I was walking out to leave he was walking back from his bus. It was perfect timing. I had been keeping an eye out for him all day, so when I saw him I walked over and he was like "Oh my god what are you doing here?" It was really funny. And I haven't seen him since I met him 2 years ago, so that was really awesome. He's very fit too, really nice abs. So we hugged, chatted, but I had to go so I didn't even get to sit down and really talk to him. But I'll see him at state I suppose, and probably that other meet.. the pre-state meet at tanglewood. So I'll actually get to see him a lot this season, so that's really exciting.
Also, I've got scholarship information due on Monday... freaking the 3rd day of school. It sucks ass because I had no time to sit down and really think about it. And it's all useless to even try for scholarships because I only have like 30 hours of community service.
That's the only way to describe how I feel right now. I feel like my xc year might just have gone down the toilet. I was so excited. Today was our first meet of the season. It was for top 7 only. I finally got into the top 7 this year and I got to run in the meet. I've never gotten to be able to run in the top 7 before. I've never run this meet before. That was my first goal: make it to meet #1. So I made that goal. Goal 2: do totally awesome at meet #1... I failed that one. Right now I'm about 4 or 5 on the team. That's amazing for me. I've never been that good before. I've been working really hard this year, running on all the off days. So today at the meet I was expecting to get 4th place... maybe 5th place on our team (not overall of course). Well yesterday these killer stomach aches hit. They have gotten better, but haven't gone away. I have no idea what they are and nothing seems to make them better (advil, tylenol, pepcid ac... nothing works). They don't seem to want to give up. Still though, press on. I didn't tell Carney, I'm not a complainer. I ran in the race anyways instead of giving up my spot and letting the altnerate run. There was no way I was gonna give up after I had finally made it to that meet. I got 27:01... freaking 27:01 and I was shooting for the 24s... maybe low 24s. And I'm so pissed at myself because I KNOW I can do a hell of a lot better than what I did today. I'm afraid that today's failure will cause me to lose heart though. I came in last for our team and I'm so afraid that my stomach won't get better.
The only good thing about today was that I got to see Max just briefly while at the meet. Hickory was running today too and as I was walking out to leave he was walking back from his bus. It was perfect timing. I had been keeping an eye out for him all day, so when I saw him I walked over and he was like "Oh my god what are you doing here?" It was really funny. And I haven't seen him since I met him 2 years ago, so that was really awesome. He's very fit too, really nice abs. So we hugged, chatted, but I had to go so I didn't even get to sit down and really talk to him. But I'll see him at state I suppose, and probably that other meet.. the pre-state meet at tanglewood. So I'll actually get to see him a lot this season, so that's really exciting.
Also, I've got scholarship information due on Monday... freaking the 3rd day of school. It sucks ass because I had no time to sit down and really think about it. And it's all useless to even try for scholarships because I only have like 30 hours of community service.