sigh
I will always like him.
I just know it.
And that sucks.
How can you honestly like a person for FOUR years and STILL not be over it? HA. I hate myself sometimes. What can I do in this situation?
Finally, FINALLY something happens, after four years, and the sad part is...nothing will come from it. Not until I'm in college at least.
So what do I do now?
Every relationship I've ever had has either ended or almost ended because of this kid.
WHY.
What can I really do.
That's right, nothing.
And to be honest, I don't even think he knows how much this is messing with me. Which makes me even more sad.
And I shouldn't be sad, cause right now things are perfect.
But it's not like we're dating, or will be. And I'm not even saying that's what I want.
But he's going to college soon anyway, and I probably won't see him for a year or more. Like last time.
So... why should I care? I try not to, and I always end up going straight back to him. I don't even think he knows how much control he has over me either. Or like I already said, how much this is messing with me.
I can't even explain it.
Four years, wow. that honeslty sucks more than anything.
Four years of wanting something you'll never have. Then you get it,... (and honestly, do I even really believe him? It's just me. 17 year-old me. Who's liked this kid for four years)... and then it goes away. Because who even knows what he wants,or what hes thinking.
Wow.
That's all I guess.
I just know it.
And that sucks.
How can you honestly like a person for FOUR years and STILL not be over it? HA. I hate myself sometimes. What can I do in this situation?
Finally, FINALLY something happens, after four years, and the sad part is...nothing will come from it. Not until I'm in college at least.
So what do I do now?
Every relationship I've ever had has either ended or almost ended because of this kid.
WHY.
What can I really do.
That's right, nothing.
And to be honest, I don't even think he knows how much this is messing with me. Which makes me even more sad.
And I shouldn't be sad, cause right now things are perfect.
But it's not like we're dating, or will be. And I'm not even saying that's what I want.
But he's going to college soon anyway, and I probably won't see him for a year or more. Like last time.
So... why should I care? I try not to, and I always end up going straight back to him. I don't even think he knows how much control he has over me either. Or like I already said, how much this is messing with me.
I can't even explain it.
Four years, wow. that honeslty sucks more than anything.
Four years of wanting something you'll never have. Then you get it,... (and honestly, do I even really believe him? It's just me. 17 year-old me. Who's liked this kid for four years)... and then it goes away. Because who even knows what he wants,or what hes thinking.
Wow.
That's all I guess.