Jul 11, 2005 20:50
"Confession: As a Christian, I am the bearer of a message packed full of love for people I am afraid to be around.
"Doesn't that sound rather convoluted? Stay away from the sinners but tell everyone about Jesus. How do you do that? Mixed messages like this have created a history of contradictions for Christians. On one hand I hold within me a love message, overflowing with forgiveness and mercy and new beginning for all. On the other, I'm uncomfortable being around people who don't believe what I believe. The contradiction is even built into the behavioral code: Witnessing to people you don't know is okay; hanging around them is not. It's got to be hit-and-run for your own safety...
"I know that I love people, but this love is covered up with a good deal of embarrassment, fear, guilt, and self-righteousness. When I meet a non-Christian, all kinds of thoughts rush through my head: I really wish I was better than you, but I'm fully aware that I am not. Getting too close to you can be a little like fraternizing with the enemy. When you are kind to me, I don't know what to do. You are messing everything up. I'm supposed to be happy as a Christian; you are supposed to be a sad and desperate sinner, so when you cheer me up with a smile or a friendly hello, it kind of takes the wind out of my spiel...
"Most of the time, I would rather observe people that interact with them. I tell myself this is part of being a writer, though I use this much too often as an excuse to stay isolated. I am a sociologist-a social philosopher-I have a right to people watch. But the tru value of personhood comes more through encounter than through mere observation."
---Confessions of a Caffeinated Christian, John Fischer