why'd ya sing hallelujah if it means nothing to ya?

[staring_atwalls]

saturday night i got incredibly drunk.
i always text incessantly whenever i get that way, words that i'd never have the courage to say sober.

i texted noel.
i was going to tell him how i wished he would have just waited for me a little bit longer for me to come around dichel. i was going to tell him i believe he's my soulmate and i wish that we could have worked it out.
but instead i texted him that it was so over. and i loved him.

the next morning krista texted me and said that that was one of the first nights he cuddled with her. and that day he was acting so sweet toward her.

the egotist in me likes to think that i changed it around.
that i made him see that while i love him. and ultimately wish i could turn back the clock to give him a chance, we can't. he's married now. and everyone just has to face it.
i made him realize that he's in a marriage. and it's time that he started acting like it.

it made me regret a little more.
not having this boy pining for me in his little way is going to break my heart.
i don't even have him in my life anymore.

but, i'm happy for krista.
she deserves the relationship that she's always dreamed of.