you make me feel, you make me shine.
i'm going to tell you the god damn truth.
my grandpa knocked my grandmother up out of wedlock, he did the respectable thing at that time and married her. they have had 60 years of marital settling.
today was my papa's birthday, he turned 82.
the majority of his life was probably spent in a state of 'what if's' and constant compromise.
i'm not saying that my papa and grammy hasn't some how managed to create their own sort of love, i imagine after so many years of marriage out of the respect that you have for one another grows something.
we went out to eat for his birthday.
on the car ride up, he held her hand.
on the car ride back, he let his hand rest on her arm.
and i started thinking about my own life, what i'm doing now.
what i thought was so right, getting myself out there before settling down.
maybe some of the doubt derived from steve.
but if there was a pinnicle moment that i would have to say changed my life, it was the moment that my papa reached out for my grammy's hand and just let it rest on hers.
in my 20 years, i have never seen them be the least bit affectionate. and it just touched me.
it brought along clarity.
it made me realize that i would love no other hand reaching out to me 60 years later than your hand. i don't want to crawl into bed with anyone else at the end of the night, but you. and i don't want to fall in a mutual respect love with someone because i fucked up with you
right at this time in my life. because i admit it. i made a mistake.
i wanted you to see what you would lose in me. that you would just understand what i do for you.
but instead i lost an important part of me.
i don't care what we have to fight for.
i don't care that you barely even fight for me.
what matters most is you're there for me at the end of the day. and you still are.
what matters is you get my fucking jokes. you appreciate my sense of humor.
what matters is you can make me laugh like no one else.
I WANT YOU
and from now on, i won't be a pushover.
but i'll make sure i show you everyday how much i want to spend the rest of my life with you. <3f&ea
my grandpa knocked my grandmother up out of wedlock, he did the respectable thing at that time and married her. they have had 60 years of marital settling.
today was my papa's birthday, he turned 82.
the majority of his life was probably spent in a state of 'what if's' and constant compromise.
i'm not saying that my papa and grammy hasn't some how managed to create their own sort of love, i imagine after so many years of marriage out of the respect that you have for one another grows something.
we went out to eat for his birthday.
on the car ride up, he held her hand.
on the car ride back, he let his hand rest on her arm.
and i started thinking about my own life, what i'm doing now.
what i thought was so right, getting myself out there before settling down.
maybe some of the doubt derived from steve.
but if there was a pinnicle moment that i would have to say changed my life, it was the moment that my papa reached out for my grammy's hand and just let it rest on hers.
in my 20 years, i have never seen them be the least bit affectionate. and it just touched me.
it brought along clarity.
it made me realize that i would love no other hand reaching out to me 60 years later than your hand. i don't want to crawl into bed with anyone else at the end of the night, but you. and i don't want to fall in a mutual respect love with someone because i fucked up with you
right at this time in my life. because i admit it. i made a mistake.
i wanted you to see what you would lose in me. that you would just understand what i do for you.
but instead i lost an important part of me.
i don't care what we have to fight for.
i don't care that you barely even fight for me.
what matters most is you're there for me at the end of the day. and you still are.
what matters is you get my fucking jokes. you appreciate my sense of humor.
what matters is you can make me laugh like no one else.
I WANT YOU
and from now on, i won't be a pushover.
but i'll make sure i show you everyday how much i want to spend the rest of my life with you. <3f&ea