quotes: SG1- season 5 and 10 | SGA - season 1 and 2
Quotes from Stargate SG1 - 'Ascension,' 'Threshold', 'Insiders', and 'The Pegasus Project' and Stargate Atlantis - 'Instinct' and 'Rising Part 1'
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Colonel Simmons: Need I remind you, Doctor Jackson, the dangers that we're trying to defend Earth against?
Daniel: (Rather sarcastically) Oh, could you ... I mean ... go ... slow . (Colonel Simmons gives him a pointed look.)
-- Ascension - season 5 - Stargate SG1
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Teal'c: Do not test my temper, WOMAN! (Teal'c has a flashback)
Daniel: Woman?!? Did ... did he just call me a ... a ... a WOMAN?! (Sam's seen walking in)
Jack: Yes, I believe he did.
Sam: He's still unconsious?
Daniel: (Long sigh) In and out ... obviously delerious.
[....later in the scene]
Sam: So, is it working? Has he said anything?
Jack: He talked about fabric briefly.
Daniel: He just called me a WOMAN. (Sam looks At Daniel)
Jack: So I think it's working.
-- Threshold - season 5- stargate SG1
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[ Scene: Sam's home, she turns around to see a man siddenly standing before her]
Orlin: I won't hurt you.
Sam: No, I'LL hurt YOU if you come any closer!
-- Ascension - season 5 - Stargate SG1
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Lee: We…uh…managed to activate the tracking system on the alkesh, and this…*On screen several dots appear with labels.* is what we got.
Cameron: Those are the Ba'al's?
Lee: More like dots, really. *Landry rolls his eyes, Teal'c raises an eyebrow* Get it? *grins* Dots, balls…*clears throat* a-any-anyway, we worked up those files with the…uh…current locations, showing the addresses and any available intel.
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[SCENE: SG-1 and the two Ba'al's walk down the ramp, Walter standing at the bottom.]
Cameron: Chief, we got a full count. Two strikes, three Ba'al's.
Walter: *a forced sort of chuckle* oh… That's clever, sir.
Sam: He was thinking that one up the whole way home.
Cameron: Yeah, the whole three seconds.
Sam: 3.2.
Cameron: Good point.
Walter: Well, that ties you with sg-12, because they brought in two more about an hour ago.
Cameron: Damn.
Sam: *Looks at Mitchell* It's not a competition. *shaking head, heads off*
Cameron: Says you.
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Cameron: So what do you think? You think Ba'al really has a way of figuring out where that weapon is?
Sam: Hard to say…I mean Anubis knew the addresses of all those planets and he never found it…mind you there was only one of him…
Cameron: Says you…*Carter smiles and nudges him with her arm*
-- Insiders - season 10 - Stargate SG1
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TEAL'C: If I had done so, I would be unable to inform you that the jump was successful. The Supergate is now active.
MITCHELL: Are you serious?
TEAL'C: There is more, Colonel Mitchell. I was able to keep the Stargate concealed until the last moment, and lure the Ori vessel into the unstable vortex of the Supergate when the jump occurred.
CARTER: You mean, we just blew up an Ori ship...
MCKAY: by destroying a Wraith ship?
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[SCENE: On the Balcony on Atlantis, Jackson and Vala look out at the city under the cloak of night]
VALA: She did what she believed was right, Daniel. How badly can she be punished for that?
JACKSON: I don't know.
VALA: Maybe she'll just get a slap on the wrist, or be forced to write "I will not interfere in the affairs of humans again" 10,000 times.
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CARTER: *to Mckay* You can check my preliminary yield calculations…they're on that station over there.
MCKAY: I'm sure they're fine.
CARTER: It's the reason you're here, Mckay.
MCKAY: *Smiles* Hmm…right…but…um…first, I just wanted to thank you for being there for me recently in a time of great personal need. Well…actually you weren't…there…I was alone in the dark *Carter makes a face clearly not liking where this seems to be going*…but…um…you know… it sure seemed like you were.
CARTER: Are you telling me one of your fantasies?
MCKAY: No, no, it's a hallucination. Look, I had a concussion, I was trapped in the back of a sinking jumper, and my mind…conjured you up as a means of survival. It's what you would do in my situation. saved my life.
CARTER: Okay, well, that's…*small smile* sort of nice.
MCKAY: *grins* Hmm. Yes, it was.
CARTER: *smile fades* Was I naked?
MCKAY: …Partially.
CARTER: *closes eyes* Check my calculations, Mckay.
MCKAY: …*mumbles…*oh…well *leaves*
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MCKAY: Oh, forgive me for not wanting to vaporize the Stargate on our first attempt.
CARTER: We're on a clock, Mckay. We have to take the risk. *walks over to another console*
MCKAY: You know, I find your recklessness so sex-... *Mitchell turns starring at him, McKay stops*
-- The Pegasus Project - season 10 - Stargate SG1
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[Scene: Dissolve to an exterior shot the next day. Rodney is sitting on a rock in the village square, which looks more like a forest clearing in the daylight. He looks worried and generally unhappy with the present turn of events. There is a young boy half-hidden behind him, staring. McKay spots him while looking around, then seems to relax into his normal state of aggravation.]
McKAY: What?!?
[The boy approaches eagerly.]
BOY: Is it true? You’re going to hunt the Daimos?
[He’s at that age where we aren’t really sure who he’s rooting for, but just hopes to see some blood and guts on the ground before it’s all over. McKay looks scathing.]
McKAY: It looks that way.
BOY: [open-mouthed with wonder] I heard it has two heads, and can turn you to stone just by looking at you!
McKAY: [getting to his feet impatiently] Well, you heard wrong.
BOY: My uncle says it’ll come and take me if I don’t do my chores.
McKAY: He said that, huh? Well then, if we get rid of it, you’ve got nothing to worry about. You’ll never have to do chores again.
BOY: Really?!
McKAY: Yes, [tchah sound] ... go away!
[Looking disappointed, the boy does so. There’s a pan that makes it first look as if McKay is staring after him, then the other three team members come into the shot, all staring at McKay.]
McKAY: What?!?
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McKAY: Never could get into biology. It’s just too much information about the human body. One time I took it as an undergrad, I diagnosed myself with half a dozen separate medical conditions before I had to drop the class.
BECKETT: [still looking through the microscope] Really?
McKAY: Yeah. Believe it or not, back then, I was a bit of a hypochondriac
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BECKETT: Now, there are many aspects of human physiology that are quite useful: bipedal motion, opposable thumbs, large brain capacity... but the human digestive system serves no purpose in the adult Wraith. So why have one at all?
WEIR: Because they eat normal food when they’re young?
BECKETT: Exactly! Then at some point, they lose the ability to sustain themselves with that food.
SHEPPARD: So it’s a teenage thing? Pimples, rebellion, life-sucking?
-- Instinct - season 2 - Stargate Atlantis
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O'NEILL: Oh, I'm convinced, have fun.
JACKSON: It's a little more complicated than that...
MCKAY: we need the zed PM to power the Gate
O'NEILL: What?
JACKSON: ZPM. He's Canadian.
O'NEILL: I'm sorry.
MCKAY: The 0 point module General. The ancient power source you recovered from quator kanas and is now powering the outpost's defenses. I've since determined that it generates it's power from vacuum energy derived from a self contained region of subspace time.
O'NEILL: That was a waste of a perfectly good explanation. The answer's no.
-- RISING PART 1 - season 1 - Stargate Atlantis
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Colonel Simmons: Need I remind you, Doctor Jackson, the dangers that we're trying to defend Earth against?
Daniel: (Rather sarcastically) Oh, could you ... I mean ... go ... slow . (Colonel Simmons gives him a pointed look.)
-- Ascension - season 5 - Stargate SG1
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Teal'c: Do not test my temper, WOMAN! (Teal'c has a flashback)
Daniel: Woman?!? Did ... did he just call me a ... a ... a WOMAN?! (Sam's seen walking in)
Jack: Yes, I believe he did.
Sam: He's still unconsious?
Daniel: (Long sigh) In and out ... obviously delerious.
[....later in the scene]
Sam: So, is it working? Has he said anything?
Jack: He talked about fabric briefly.
Daniel: He just called me a WOMAN. (Sam looks At Daniel)
Jack: So I think it's working.
-- Threshold - season 5- stargate SG1
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[ Scene: Sam's home, she turns around to see a man siddenly standing before her]
Orlin: I won't hurt you.
Sam: No, I'LL hurt YOU if you come any closer!
-- Ascension - season 5 - Stargate SG1
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Lee: We…uh…managed to activate the tracking system on the alkesh, and this…*On screen several dots appear with labels.* is what we got.
Cameron: Those are the Ba'al's?
Lee: More like dots, really. *Landry rolls his eyes, Teal'c raises an eyebrow* Get it? *grins* Dots, balls…*clears throat* a-any-anyway, we worked up those files with the…uh…current locations, showing the addresses and any available intel.
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[SCENE: SG-1 and the two Ba'al's walk down the ramp, Walter standing at the bottom.]
Cameron: Chief, we got a full count. Two strikes, three Ba'al's.
Walter: *a forced sort of chuckle* oh… That's clever, sir.
Sam: He was thinking that one up the whole way home.
Cameron: Yeah, the whole three seconds.
Sam: 3.2.
Cameron: Good point.
Walter: Well, that ties you with sg-12, because they brought in two more about an hour ago.
Cameron: Damn.
Sam: *Looks at Mitchell* It's not a competition. *shaking head, heads off*
Cameron: Says you.
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Cameron: So what do you think? You think Ba'al really has a way of figuring out where that weapon is?
Sam: Hard to say…I mean Anubis knew the addresses of all those planets and he never found it…mind you there was only one of him…
Cameron: Says you…*Carter smiles and nudges him with her arm*
-- Insiders - season 10 - Stargate SG1
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TEAL'C: If I had done so, I would be unable to inform you that the jump was successful. The Supergate is now active.
MITCHELL: Are you serious?
TEAL'C: There is more, Colonel Mitchell. I was able to keep the Stargate concealed until the last moment, and lure the Ori vessel into the unstable vortex of the Supergate when the jump occurred.
CARTER: You mean, we just blew up an Ori ship...
MCKAY: by destroying a Wraith ship?
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[SCENE: On the Balcony on Atlantis, Jackson and Vala look out at the city under the cloak of night]
VALA: She did what she believed was right, Daniel. How badly can she be punished for that?
JACKSON: I don't know.
VALA: Maybe she'll just get a slap on the wrist, or be forced to write "I will not interfere in the affairs of humans again" 10,000 times.
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CARTER: *to Mckay* You can check my preliminary yield calculations…they're on that station over there.
MCKAY: I'm sure they're fine.
CARTER: It's the reason you're here, Mckay.
MCKAY: *Smiles* Hmm…right…but…um…first, I just wanted to thank you for being there for me recently in a time of great personal need. Well…actually you weren't…there…I was alone in the dark *Carter makes a face clearly not liking where this seems to be going*…but…um…you know… it sure seemed like you were.
CARTER: Are you telling me one of your fantasies?
MCKAY: No, no, it's a hallucination. Look, I had a concussion, I was trapped in the back of a sinking jumper, and my mind…conjured you up as a means of survival. It's what you would do in my situation. saved my life.
CARTER: Okay, well, that's…*small smile* sort of nice.
MCKAY: *grins* Hmm. Yes, it was.
CARTER: *smile fades* Was I naked?
MCKAY: …Partially.
CARTER: *closes eyes* Check my calculations, Mckay.
MCKAY: …*mumbles…*oh…well *leaves*
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MCKAY: Oh, forgive me for not wanting to vaporize the Stargate on our first attempt.
CARTER: We're on a clock, Mckay. We have to take the risk. *walks over to another console*
MCKAY: You know, I find your recklessness so sex-... *Mitchell turns starring at him, McKay stops*
-- The Pegasus Project - season 10 - Stargate SG1
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[Scene: Dissolve to an exterior shot the next day. Rodney is sitting on a rock in the village square, which looks more like a forest clearing in the daylight. He looks worried and generally unhappy with the present turn of events. There is a young boy half-hidden behind him, staring. McKay spots him while looking around, then seems to relax into his normal state of aggravation.]
McKAY: What?!?
[The boy approaches eagerly.]
BOY: Is it true? You’re going to hunt the Daimos?
[He’s at that age where we aren’t really sure who he’s rooting for, but just hopes to see some blood and guts on the ground before it’s all over. McKay looks scathing.]
McKAY: It looks that way.
BOY: [open-mouthed with wonder] I heard it has two heads, and can turn you to stone just by looking at you!
McKAY: [getting to his feet impatiently] Well, you heard wrong.
BOY: My uncle says it’ll come and take me if I don’t do my chores.
McKAY: He said that, huh? Well then, if we get rid of it, you’ve got nothing to worry about. You’ll never have to do chores again.
BOY: Really?!
McKAY: Yes, [tchah sound] ... go away!
[Looking disappointed, the boy does so. There’s a pan that makes it first look as if McKay is staring after him, then the other three team members come into the shot, all staring at McKay.]
McKAY: What?!?
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McKAY: Never could get into biology. It’s just too much information about the human body. One time I took it as an undergrad, I diagnosed myself with half a dozen separate medical conditions before I had to drop the class.
BECKETT: [still looking through the microscope] Really?
McKAY: Yeah. Believe it or not, back then, I was a bit of a hypochondriac
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BECKETT: Now, there are many aspects of human physiology that are quite useful: bipedal motion, opposable thumbs, large brain capacity... but the human digestive system serves no purpose in the adult Wraith. So why have one at all?
WEIR: Because they eat normal food when they’re young?
BECKETT: Exactly! Then at some point, they lose the ability to sustain themselves with that food.
SHEPPARD: So it’s a teenage thing? Pimples, rebellion, life-sucking?
-- Instinct - season 2 - Stargate Atlantis
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O'NEILL: Oh, I'm convinced, have fun.
JACKSON: It's a little more complicated than that...
MCKAY: we need the zed PM to power the Gate
O'NEILL: What?
JACKSON: ZPM. He's Canadian.
O'NEILL: I'm sorry.
MCKAY: The 0 point module General. The ancient power source you recovered from quator kanas and is now powering the outpost's defenses. I've since determined that it generates it's power from vacuum energy derived from a self contained region of subspace time.
O'NEILL: That was a waste of a perfectly good explanation. The answer's no.
-- RISING PART 1 - season 1 - Stargate Atlantis