Chapter 39: Satori
July 12
Four Days Later
Gaia's Bridge
"There you have it," said Zeus, gesturing magnanimously toward the holographic view of the planet in orbit below them. "The home world of the Third Race, site of the Burning Gate." He smiled at the Furling Captain. "I now require my ship to be made ready." He glanced around the elegantly decorated control center. "Though I have great admiration for this one, my friends. Perhaps we might arrange a trade."
"We are still accomplishing repairs to your ship, which was damaged in battle, great Zeus." Captain gave him a slight bow. "It will meet us here in a few days. Until then, we would be honored if you would remain aboard Gaia as our guest."
"Of course." Zeus inclined his head slightly. He was tired of ingratiating himself to these tiresome people. He wanted his ship and crew. He wanted to be worshipped again, and he needed to break through the barrier that kept him from the powers of his new host, if he were going to strike fear into other races.
He was close; he knew it. He could sense the human's mind brushing against his own, restless and filled with emotional turmoil. All he needed to do was draw Daniel Jackson out of his mental hibernation, and then Zeus would make the connection that would conquer his weak human mind. That was how it always worked... but not so far with this human; Jackson was proving a worthy challenge for his new master.
With a sigh, Zeus wandered through the ship alone, making his way back to the chambers that had been prepared for him. They were suitable, different from the ones his host had occupied before Zeus took possession of him, according to his hosts. These rooms had gilded furniture, beautiful artworks everywhere, rich jewel-toned upholsteries. They were apartments worthy of his status -- of a king, if not a god.
He stepped inside and admired the appointments, studying a mural on the wall.
He was terribly bored.
"Great Zeus," called a voice from the doorway. "I have brought the wine you requested."
The System Lord turned to face one of the Furlings -- the first officer, he thought, but he didn't know the creature's name. He thought it odd that they kept such things to themselves. Still, the giant would provide him with a bit of distraction while he waited for his ship to be delivered, and he came bearing gifts.
"Attend me," called Zeus, waving the servant into his room.
The giant was quick to obey. He even dropped to one knee to pour and respectfully serve the goblet to his master.
Zeus made a great show of tasting the nectar. It was a trifle sweeter than he liked, but it would do. He swallowed the whole cup down and presented it again for more. Halfway through the second serving, he started to feel a pleasant buzz.
The more he studied this Furling's face, the more certain he was that this was the executive officer, whom General O'Neill had called Denali.
"Tell me," Zeus inquired with a trace of merriment, "what do you intend to do with the human, O'Neill? It would amuse me to bargain for him."
"We are preparing to send him back to his people, now that we have reached our destination."
"Pity. He might have provided me some spectacular entertainment." Zeus took another sip, and began to feel unreasonably tired, even though he'd only risen from an excellent night's sleep a few hours earlier. The painting that had attracted his interest earlier swam a little behind the giant's head, and with a start Zeus realized the wine in his grasp had been drugged.
He turned on unsteady legs, barely catching himself, and held precariously onto his balance as he sought some piece of furniture to catch him before he collapsed to the floor. He couldn't make his legs work, couldn't speak, but he could see, and he still possessed perfect clarity of mind. Fear crept into the Goa'uld's heart, chilling him to the bone.
What treachery was this?
The giant eyed him with disgust as he got to his feet and set aside the serving dishes he'd just used. "Now, great Zeus," he mocked, sneering, "our bargain will be completed."
He lifted the body of Daniel Jackson like a sack of grain, tossed him over one shoulder, and carried him through the ship to an unfamiliar area. The corridor along the way was lined with Furlings of all Clans, each one staring at him with accusing, dangerous eyes.
He was unceremoniously dumped onto a plain, hard bunk in a stark, featureless cell, empty except for the rough bed and a utilitarian toilet area.
Denali stepped back and activated a force field, locking Zeus inside the tiny room.
"This is your prison," said the giant. There was a touch of haughtiness in his voice, triumph gleaming in his eyes. "You will remain here, well fed, well cared for, in perfect health, until you die."
Two more of the Mountain Clan stepped through the door in the anteroom outside the cell and took up posts, hands clasped behind their backs, staring at their prisoner.
Their attention never wavered, and the hatred in their faces was plain.
As the effects of the drug began to fade, Zeus struggled to sit up. "I demand my freedom," he snarled, his speech still slurred.
One of the guards cocked his head. "You have no power except what you are given," he announced, "and the People choose to give you none."
"I will escape," Zeus claimed. "You cannot hold me here. My people will come for me."
"Your people have abandoned you," rumbled the other guard. "They are being freed from the hold you once had on them, healed from the damage your kind has done. Soon you will all be nothing more than a memory, a horror story told only in the dark, in whispers."
Zeus got to his feet, screaming expletives at them in Goa'uld. Staggering, he walked right into the force-field barrier, bouncing off it with an electric sizzle that zapped along his skin and threw him backwards onto the lowly cot. He was furious, enraged beyond reason.
Daniel couldn't keep his silence any longer. They're the Furlings, you monster, and you'll never get out of this room! Trust me on that. We're stuck here till you let me die.
Zeus froze. He felt the mental strike of the words, as well as the emotion behind them, like a physical blow. Then he smiled and closed his eyes so he could concentrate.
Only he was totally unprepared for what he found when he wormed his way into that other mind. There was no fear, only hatred and the unimaginable pain of a being who had survived the unthinkable. The force of those memories took Zeus's breath away, and he just sat there, bewildered and lost beneath the assault of Jackson's powerful intellect and passionate nature.
Daniel had been no ordinary human. His mind was a brilliant light, his spirit forged in conflict and shattering loss. He had given up his body more than once, existing on a purely spiritual plane for a time. Daniel Jackson was still his enemy -- now, more than ever.
Wide-eyed and staring, Zeus couldn't get up, couldn't speak. He was panting for breath now, the heart he'd stolen pounding under the ribs he inhabited but would never own. Desperately, he sought some shelter from the mental storm unleashed upon him, but there was none. Inside that purloined body, there was no place to hide from its rightful owner.
A god, he knew, could not feel regret.
For the first time, he admitted to himself that he was no god.
~~**~~
July 15
Three Days Later
Daniel needed to rest. He'd kept up a constant mental and emotional attack on Zeus for -- well, he didn't really know how long it had been. Days, perhaps.
An eternity.
Zeus had been pacing for hours now, babbling and waving his arms. He shook and shouted at the ghosts Daniel vomited up from his memory, clenched his fists at them, flinching and dodging as though they were physically in the room.
Shau're. Ska'ara. Kasuf. Kowalsky. Hammond. Janet Fraiser. Sarah Gardner. Sam Carter.
Every victim of the Goa'uld he knew, every crime he had witnessed at their hands, including the destruction of Earth -- Daniel replayed the memories over and over in a constant, violent stream, focusing his emotions like a laser, straight into the mind of the symbiote. All his grief and horror poured into Zeus like acid through a tiny crack, eating away at the opening between them.
The memories alone were enough to drive anyone mad. Daniel thought he must be at least a little crazy, after all that; still, he didn't let up. If Zeus wanted control of Daniel's body, there'd be a price to pay, and this was it. Though he doubted the monster felt any sort of guilt or remorse, the mental noise alone would be deafening. The force of his interaction with Zeus went only one way, the constant tide of memory and emotion driving the Goa'uld's mind further and further away from blending with that of his host.
This was Daniel's "gotcha" moment, the same dance he'd done with RepliCarter when she'd held him prisoner aboard her ship, probing his mind for the secrets of the Ancients that he kept so carefully hidden. She had launched an all-out mental assault against him, and he had responded with evasion and emotionally-powered reasoning, all the while sneaking underneath her radar to seize control of her connection with the vast Replicator army.
He knew how to wage this kind of war, on the battlefield of the mind. After working with Scout almost daily on tactics and defensive maneuvers from the Forest Clan arts of war, Daniel had learned to translate all kinds of strategic concepts, and that preparation now served him well.
Satori, he thought. It was Japanese, a Zen term that meant 'enlightenment,' but with shades of so much more: discovery, realization, truth, acceptance.
This was a kind of enlightenment he'd never expected to find, but something else was happening as well; something Daniel couldn't explain. The Goa'uld was deteriorating inside him, losing its grip on reality along with its control of Daniel's body. He could sense it growing sick and weak, its health failing rapidly. Sometimes it was completely silent and still.
For moments at a time, Daniel managed to steal control of his body. Occasionally, he just lifted a finger before the creature woke up and seized the reins again, but what had started as an instant here and there, eventually became minutes, longer and longer each time.
As soon as he could manage it, he walked to the bunk and sat down to give his weary body a chance to rest. It felt a little strange, doing what he wanted, but he was certain it wouldn't last. The Goa'uld was just sleeping, he supposed. He'd beaten it down for a bit.
"I want to see General O'Neill, if he's still aboard ship," he told his guards. "Please."
Ten minutes later, his old friend stepped into the anteroom, his face drawn and weary. There were dark circles under his eyes, and he'd begun to look his age. His expression was wary. "You asked to see me?"
Daniel nodded, amazed he was still in command of his muscles and voice. "It's me, Jack," he said softly, "not... the snake." He waved a hand in the air.
Jack looked relieved, but only for a moment. "How is it that you can talk now?"
"Zeus is sick. I think. Maybe." He dared not hope, but the words came out anyway. "Maybe dying."
"That'd be good."
"Yeah." Daniel ran a hand through his matted hair. He felt gritty, like he'd never bathed in his whole life. Suddenly, he didn't know what else to say to his friend.
After a long silence, Jack said softly, "I'm sorry I couldn't save you, Daniel. I just... I didn't see that coming." He shook his head. "I trusted these folks. We both did. I guess maybe we know now why the Ancients thought they needed to be locked up." He shot a scathing glance at one of the Mountain Clan on guard.
The giant's gaze never wavered, fixed resolutely on his prisoner, but his lips thinned with stubborn pride, and he lifted his chin slightly.
"You tried to help." Daniel gave him a fond smile. "You offered to take my place as host. That means a lot to me."
Staring at the floor now, Jack nodded in acknowledgment. "What did Scout say to you?" asked Jack. "You know, after I shot him."
Daniel didn't give him an exact translation, frowning at his hands in his lap, still puzzling over that. "He just asked me to trust him."
Jack snorted derisively. "Yeah, right after he helped you get snaked, he wants you to trust him? Riiiiiight. On a frosty day in hell!"
The pieces still wouldn't connect. Jack had a good point, one that had been circling restlessly in the back of Daniel's mind. Why ask for trust the moment after the ultimate betrayal? His frown deepened. He picked at a torn cuticle beside a dirty fingernail. "Is el-Mikha... dead?" He kept his gaze lowered, unwilling to see the answer in Jack's eyes.
"No." Jack's voice was tight. "At least, I don't think so. No one's volunteered the information. Nobody's mentioned a state funeral."
"Did you ask?"
"Well, I." Jack cleared his throat. "No. Not really. I didn't exactly care."
Daniel glanced at the guards in the back of the anteroom and opened his mouth to ask them, but the voice issuing from his throat wasn't entirely his own.
"You will all die in agony!" declared Zeus, the familiar heat once more flashing across his eyes.
Jack stiffened and sucked in a breath. He glanced away and swore softly. "I gotta go," he said quickly, and left the room at a jog.
Shut up, Daniel ordered the symbiote.
"I control you, human," said Zeus aloud.
Those guards over there think you're talking to yourself, said Daniel to his demon. They think you're a nut job. Which you are.
Daniel felt the symbiote direct his eyes to the guards' faces, and the flush of embarrassment was followed by a haughty lift of his chin as he struggled to maintain the appearance of control.
Give it up, Zeus. They know how pathetic you are.
Zeus clenched his fists and roared, "Be silent!"
In the privacy of his mind, Daniel chuckled. What a ridiculous clown you are, he told the Goa'uld. I wasted an entire year hating you, and you weren't worth it. Just a crazy, mumbling psycho, talking to shadows and thumping his stolen chest to make people afraid of you. Pitiful.
Daniel felt his hands go to his head, clamped against his temples. His blood pressure built rapidly as Zeus roared with outrage and fury, again demanding Daniel's silence. "I am a god!" Zeus roared, pounding his fists against the sides of his head. "You will fear me, or I will destroy you!"
He whirled at the sound of more chuckling, glaring at the Furling guards posted across the room, their eyes no longer accusing, only glimmering with bitter humor.
"Nooooooo!" screamed Zeus. "I am a god! Bow down to me! I demand it!" As he pointed to the floor in front of his feet, a tiny lightning bolt shot from his fingertip to his toes, and he screamed in pain.
The guards erupted in full-fledged laughter at the sight, elbowing one another, pointing and jeering at their prisoner.
You see? Daniel asked in the echoes of their shared mind. You'll never leave this cell, Zeus. They'll be laughing at you as long as you keep me alive, never aging, confined to this tiny, bare little room, with just me for company. I'll always be here, Zeus, reminding you what a failure you are, how pathetic you are, inflicting my pain and hatred on you every moment of every single day.
Welcome to hell, little god. I'll never leave you alone. You made a big mistake, choosing me for a host. Maybe the Furlings knew what they were doing, after all.
Daniel felt his chin tip up, his eyes sliding closed, as Zeus's defeat washed over him.
In a perverse way, it was the best revenge; no sensation had ever felt so sweet, so welcome.
End Chapter 39