FIC: Part 2 - Demand

[starfirefic]

Title: Part 2 - Demand
Author: starfirefic
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Owen, Jack
Word Count: ~2,000ish
Genre: Kink, pure and simple (oh, alright, there may be some character stuff in there too)
Rating: Definite NC-17
Beta: The incomparable riftugee (without whom there'd be a lot more monologue, and a lot less Jacktion)

Author's Notes:Written as the second part of

Comments

[starfirefic]

Wow - thank you so much for the long comment, and letting me know the things that worked for you in here.

Heh... I have to grin - the things that seemed to give you the most "guh"s were the things I totally got a "guh" out of writing.

With respect to the concrit, thanks for that as well. It's interesting with the way Owen refers to Jack as "Harkness" - I think I remember him doing that once or twice in s1 when he was at his most on edge and pissed off, and because he spends most of "Denial" and "Demand" in exactly that state, it worked in my head for him to do the same (although it was deliberate that the further he fell into subspace, the less he used it, and the more it became "Jack" in his mind). I totally appreciate that it might not work the same for everyone though, so thanks for letting me know.

As for the 'sweet little Tosh' thing... ooops - it didn't occur to me that it could strike someone that way. Heh... I originally had the bit about there being lines Jack wouldn't cross as him saying "I left the days when I'd force myself on the genuinely unwilling behind me a long time ago" because it sounded threatening in my mind, but my lovely beta pointed out that it made Jack sound like a recovering rapist, and that wasn't *really* the image I had in mine for him, so that got reworked quite a bit to the way it is now. Possibly the line you've pointed out could do with similar treatment (*looks embarrassed*)

Anyway, thank you for commenting - I really do appreciate it!

[pandatini]

Heh... I originally had the bit about there being lines Jack wouldn't cross as him saying "I left the days when I'd force myself on the genuinely unwilling behind me a long time ago" because it sounded threatening in my mind, but my lovely beta pointed out that it made Jack sound like a recovering rapist, and that wasn't *really* the image I had in mine for him,

Heh, the funny thing is, on first read-through that line *doesn't* strike me as Jack being a recovering rapist ... but maybe that's because I have a dub-con/non-con kink in fanfic. I guess it just goes to prove different things strike people in different ways.

Anyway, you're welcome ;)