Taking it one day at a time...
Normally I'm not one to talk about my problems or issues with anyone, It was just the way i was brought up,I've learned to always have a smile on my face and to try and never let anyone see you cry or get upset or angry in anyway.. I keep everything to myself and work it out on my own but sometimes it gets be too much and I have to find some way to vent or my little cup of worries will overflow and cause a big ol' mess...I am after all only human. If your reading this than it is of your own accord...
The love of my life is gone and he wont be back until April 2nd... To most of you, that may not seem like a long time,all of you tell me that he'll be back in no time, that the time will fly by and to stop being such a baby but none of you can really understand how it feels until your in my position.And most of you never will... When you love someone as much as i love him, when he's the only good thing that has ever happened in your life. And your used to seeing him almost everyday and than suddenly the gods of fate and life decide to test just how strong you really are by throwing you a curve ball and suddenly your driven far apart from each other....every second of everyday feels like years to me... I'm doing my best to keep myself composed..but i miss him so much, all i have left to keep me going are his letters that he sends.
I know this year valentine's day is going to be one of the worst days ever...I'm not sure if I'll be able to force myself to get out of bed.I can't wait to see him again, once he comes back we can start our life together like we talked about but until than I'm stuck here waiting for him.I always thought that i was going to be alone for the rest of my life, and i had actually come to terms with that fact... I learned to accept it and i was able to smile,laugh and live happily in my loneliness.. Ever since i was little i always knew that my heart was on its own and so was i.. but now that I've met the man that i very well may spend the rest of my life with I'm not so sure if i can act that way again, for the first time since my birth i was able to experience what love was really like,my family never gave it to me. Which is understandable seeing considering who my parents are and the fact that i was a mistake and never planned in the first place.
But he was the one to show me that even a person like me could love and be loved in return.So now that he's gone it hurts more than i could ever imagine,but i know if I'm patient it'll all be over soon like a bad dream forgotten in the morning...
My education has been put on hold for now, I was such a good student before i was even on the dean's list and than everything slipped away from me... so for now I'm taking a break.. i figured that its what i needed i mean i did go straight into college after high school so maybe my brain just needs a little vacation time and I'll be able to get back on track. Hopefully my dreams and goals aren't too far out of reach now..
-end-
So for those of you who decided to skip the stuff under the cut..here's what's been going on in my life. Work has stated to look up, I get paid in a few days which is good because I'm broke after paying rent XP I've been watching and reading manga like crazy...increasing my already encyclopedia of anime.
I've been practicing drawing more and I'm getting better and better at it, which is good because if i plan on being a Manga-ka than i need to be good at drawing. No scratch that i need to be excellent at drawing.Speaking of Manga, I've been working on both of mine and developing them more and more..
I want to start a blog like Cake wrecks or something like that... but i wouldn't even know where to begin or what to do it about because almost everything about everything has been done already. A web-comic would be cool as well.. but i don't think i could do it on my own..
That's about everything that's going on right now...nothing too special here...just everyday, mundane stuff.......
gosh, i wish i was a superhero >.
The love of my life is gone and he wont be back until April 2nd... To most of you, that may not seem like a long time,all of you tell me that he'll be back in no time, that the time will fly by and to stop being such a baby but none of you can really understand how it feels until your in my position.And most of you never will... When you love someone as much as i love him, when he's the only good thing that has ever happened in your life. And your used to seeing him almost everyday and than suddenly the gods of fate and life decide to test just how strong you really are by throwing you a curve ball and suddenly your driven far apart from each other....every second of everyday feels like years to me... I'm doing my best to keep myself composed..but i miss him so much, all i have left to keep me going are his letters that he sends.
I know this year valentine's day is going to be one of the worst days ever...I'm not sure if I'll be able to force myself to get out of bed.I can't wait to see him again, once he comes back we can start our life together like we talked about but until than I'm stuck here waiting for him.I always thought that i was going to be alone for the rest of my life, and i had actually come to terms with that fact... I learned to accept it and i was able to smile,laugh and live happily in my loneliness.. Ever since i was little i always knew that my heart was on its own and so was i.. but now that I've met the man that i very well may spend the rest of my life with I'm not so sure if i can act that way again, for the first time since my birth i was able to experience what love was really like,my family never gave it to me. Which is understandable seeing considering who my parents are and the fact that i was a mistake and never planned in the first place.
But he was the one to show me that even a person like me could love and be loved in return.So now that he's gone it hurts more than i could ever imagine,but i know if I'm patient it'll all be over soon like a bad dream forgotten in the morning...
My education has been put on hold for now, I was such a good student before i was even on the dean's list and than everything slipped away from me... so for now I'm taking a break.. i figured that its what i needed i mean i did go straight into college after high school so maybe my brain just needs a little vacation time and I'll be able to get back on track. Hopefully my dreams and goals aren't too far out of reach now..
-end-
So for those of you who decided to skip the stuff under the cut..here's what's been going on in my life. Work has stated to look up, I get paid in a few days which is good because I'm broke after paying rent XP I've been watching and reading manga like crazy...increasing my already encyclopedia of anime.
I've been practicing drawing more and I'm getting better and better at it, which is good because if i plan on being a Manga-ka than i need to be good at drawing. No scratch that i need to be excellent at drawing.Speaking of Manga, I've been working on both of mine and developing them more and more..
I want to start a blog like Cake wrecks or something like that... but i wouldn't even know where to begin or what to do it about because almost everything about everything has been done already. A web-comic would be cool as well.. but i don't think i could do it on my own..
That's about everything that's going on right now...nothing too special here...just everyday, mundane stuff.......
gosh, i wish i was a superhero >.