fare thee well my bright star.
so i was cleaning my closet today and i found my box. . . a box that had been on my nightstand for years. inside the box i knew was a pocket watch that was given to me by a friend the morning i left for college in return i gave him a mood ring that i'd been wearing since the day he met me. so i sent him a message to let him know that it was probably about time that i gave it back to him. . . he came back with i still have your ring it's sitting on my dresser. in side that box i found a headless marvin given to me by another friend let him know about it too and "keep it in remembrance of me" was the answer i recieved. i found pictures of an old gf and me and a news article about the death of a friend. a cross taken from a sacred place a locket and a piece of poetry and a virgo key chain from vs.the ribbons i wore the day i was initiated into my sorority alongwith my pin. this box has accompanied me since 97 it was a small security blaket filled with things that i loved people that i loved. the watch has long since stopped working and the meaning behind it has run it's course but it meant the word to me to know that i still had it and so did he. It is lightly perfumed by the locket as is everything else in this box. it was a box full of dreams dreams spent some never fufilled and some still to come. as i was telling the boys of my discovery the girl in the picture's fav song came on. hence the title of this entry. i was reminded that i'm not dying or moving out of the country or anything like that i'm just moving away. i want to go back to that time those moments where everything seemed to have it's place and could fit into a box. little pieces of people little bits of memories small enough to keep on a bedside table. i found the shirt i was wearing when i lost my virginity you can still see the chocolate sauce. . . it brought me back to a night with too much vodka cool ranch doritoes much puking and truth or dare. and a morning with the WORST hangover i have ever had. to days of meeting someone on the play ground at camp to the wake up song the guys taking over my house playing video games smoking pot and lots of sex. to saying goodbye as i left for college to saying hello when i came home to camp to parties to random meaning less horrible sex to experimentation to getting arrested, to infatuation to xtacy to the white rabbit to rides in cop cars coming back from the falls walking in the woods ghost stories times that seemed to never end times that needed to end long long ago puking in sinks finishing kegs long trips to the beach little inside jokes too much taquilla freezie pops driving while intoxicated falling in love falling out of love finding ourselves losing ourselves dropping out dropping in wearing too much clothing or too little caring too much or not enough waking up to peanut butter being passed over my head coming out of being with someone and hooking up with another drives to kd following to many parties to the hot tub club to the sex with all your friends and your friends friends club living together hating eachother committment IBC root beer to crashing in purple to crashing purple and having someone save me to endless nights of playing cards with mom and dad lucky pudge to the WARP tour to music kegs bad hair cuts bad trips 10 strips the jester nights of pool and darts waking up in strange places nekkid time i'll get nekkid if you get nekkid to firsts and lasts dancing till dawn or till they kicked us out TDP babies hopes of babies losses most of all to all of the great memories that we have kicking around in our own lil boxes somewhere locked away.