Why I tattoo...
I consider myself a person bound to security. I do actually like things tidy, but the burning need to go through every paper and itemize everything and cross reference and rearrange and make sense of what is already put away so it's more livable always seems to come first.
I do not like to spend lots of money randomly, though it seems to burn holes in my pockets - it tends to go towards necessary things or stuff that improves quality of life.
I do not like rollercoasters, driving really really fast, police scare the shit out of me, and pain - while sometimes fun to inflict, is rarely a positive thing to experience on the recieving end.
I am still the girl who's mother gave her 20 bucks and said "go have fun" and came back home with a doormat, an ironing board cover, and a soda.
I am still the girl who would much rather buy lots of things I don't love than the one big ticket item I adore. It's a matter of practicality. With many things there are increased odds of both finding enjoyment or use in one of them then there is in buying one item.
Tattoo's come about firstly in my world because I feel a need to dare myself to do something different, to allow myself to be vulnerable to someone else's craftsmanship, to pain, to someone else's order and expertise really in a way that no other part of life demands. Some people will get on that rollercoaster, or that spinnythingy that sucks you to the sides and makes you want to vomit. Not I. Those are definitely NOT for me. But this, this is like another form of hairdying for me. It's more permanent and therfore requires more thought. In the past I have fucked up, just as I have with hairdye, and not thought things through - just said fuck it and ran the risk. I was not happy with the result, but I learned how to own it, and make it mine, how to fix it, and make it better without ever leaving behind the simple fact that I had once thought unwisely and made a mistake. So sometimes a tattoo is not just about allowing yourself to do something different, but forgiving yourself for it too.
The second part a tattoo enters my mind is symbolism. Something sings to me and it resonates inside - as if clanging the bells of awareness, and I need to see something of this externally, i need to see the message and there aren't always words for the message - just an image. Sometimes there are words and an image will speak for the many thousands that appear. That's why it's called symbolism.
If someday I regret getting a tattoo, it will be because I regret something or someone I have been, a choice I have made. I will be forced to accept it or do something drastic to attone for it.
I try to live my life doing as little as possible that I will regret and doing as much as possible so that I won't regret doing nothing.
I don't get tattoo's to impress people, or really to show off. If I did you'd see them in far more prominent places. My tattoo's are apart of me just live every other decision they just happen to be in phsyical form that -can- be seen. I don't get political messages put on me, I probably won't have many if any words tattooed on me beyond the ones that I have a damn good idea aren't ever going to change their meaning on me in a negative way. I don't expect my symbolism to resonate with others, I don't care if it does because -I- don't even make sense or resonate to others and I'm certainly not going to let that affect me - if not one then not the other two I say.
Unlike a picture, unlike a poem, unlike half a dozen other forms of expression out there - a tattoo cannot be ripped, it cannot be burned, it cannot be broken or placed in the trash. Like the rest of a person it can be neglected, forgotten, covered up, touched up, admired, hated, etc... it's a message more to me, the person who bares it, to mark my existance to mark my changes etc.
I don't explain this to convert peoples minds - that's really not my goal. The only goal I have is to offer up some explanation to the confused and curious.
I do not like to spend lots of money randomly, though it seems to burn holes in my pockets - it tends to go towards necessary things or stuff that improves quality of life.
I do not like rollercoasters, driving really really fast, police scare the shit out of me, and pain - while sometimes fun to inflict, is rarely a positive thing to experience on the recieving end.
I am still the girl who's mother gave her 20 bucks and said "go have fun" and came back home with a doormat, an ironing board cover, and a soda.
I am still the girl who would much rather buy lots of things I don't love than the one big ticket item I adore. It's a matter of practicality. With many things there are increased odds of both finding enjoyment or use in one of them then there is in buying one item.
Tattoo's come about firstly in my world because I feel a need to dare myself to do something different, to allow myself to be vulnerable to someone else's craftsmanship, to pain, to someone else's order and expertise really in a way that no other part of life demands. Some people will get on that rollercoaster, or that spinnythingy that sucks you to the sides and makes you want to vomit. Not I. Those are definitely NOT for me. But this, this is like another form of hairdying for me. It's more permanent and therfore requires more thought. In the past I have fucked up, just as I have with hairdye, and not thought things through - just said fuck it and ran the risk. I was not happy with the result, but I learned how to own it, and make it mine, how to fix it, and make it better without ever leaving behind the simple fact that I had once thought unwisely and made a mistake. So sometimes a tattoo is not just about allowing yourself to do something different, but forgiving yourself for it too.
The second part a tattoo enters my mind is symbolism. Something sings to me and it resonates inside - as if clanging the bells of awareness, and I need to see something of this externally, i need to see the message and there aren't always words for the message - just an image. Sometimes there are words and an image will speak for the many thousands that appear. That's why it's called symbolism.
If someday I regret getting a tattoo, it will be because I regret something or someone I have been, a choice I have made. I will be forced to accept it or do something drastic to attone for it.
I try to live my life doing as little as possible that I will regret and doing as much as possible so that I won't regret doing nothing.
I don't get tattoo's to impress people, or really to show off. If I did you'd see them in far more prominent places. My tattoo's are apart of me just live every other decision they just happen to be in phsyical form that -can- be seen. I don't get political messages put on me, I probably won't have many if any words tattooed on me beyond the ones that I have a damn good idea aren't ever going to change their meaning on me in a negative way. I don't expect my symbolism to resonate with others, I don't care if it does because -I- don't even make sense or resonate to others and I'm certainly not going to let that affect me - if not one then not the other two I say.
Unlike a picture, unlike a poem, unlike half a dozen other forms of expression out there - a tattoo cannot be ripped, it cannot be burned, it cannot be broken or placed in the trash. Like the rest of a person it can be neglected, forgotten, covered up, touched up, admired, hated, etc... it's a message more to me, the person who bares it, to mark my existance to mark my changes etc.
I don't explain this to convert peoples minds - that's really not my goal. The only goal I have is to offer up some explanation to the confused and curious.