*DONT ASK*
When I am with friends, I feel totally happy. Just being with them, in their company means the world to me. If its just sitting there having a deep conversation with them, or if its out bowling or going to the cinema. Now has this not been recognised by anyone else in this day and age of living?
It seems like no matter how much people like you, they always seem to be bothered by what you do. You're doing something thats not very fair. I mean, when you are with friends, shouldnt it just be about being with them, and not really caing what happens, unless of course, it involves something illegal. But friends should care about each other no matter what.
TEH FUCK!!!!!!!
EDIT: Maybe Im just chatting crap...but if anyone understands any of this, then at least I still have my sanity. I just cant really think clear...so Im just typing whatever Im thinking.. MEH!
Mainly ranting about the fact of people getting involved in other peoples situations. You know, people trying to ruin your happiness. What the rant above was about, if it made any sense, was about me staying with Jo.
Her Flatmates have said that Im taking the piss! With what, I help Jo with food etc thje best I can with the money I get. They wanna moan at me that they have to pay for the place and Im not. Do they have any clue where Im spending christmas, what sort of person I am. I cant believe that think they have the right to go expressing their upset. I hardly see them at all, about once or twice a week, for like 5 minutes, and thats when I happen to be cooking in the kitchen with Jo. I know and respect that they have to share the flat. But its not as if I am trying to be all friendly with them, I dont regard them as friends at all. Thats what gets me more annoyed, I dont even know them, and they think Im taking the piss staying with Jo. I mean what right have they got saying its unfair on Jo herself! I fucking know shes happy, thats why she wanted me down here in the first place.
*sigh* I really dont know why I bother sometimes...I feel like Ive got no where, no matter how many months have passed by. Im still getting rejected, disrepected and haunted. Haunted by emotions and situations that happened with Louise. They just keep creeping up on me, and I suppose that its not fair that I always cry to Jo and talk about the bad stuff that happened when I was with Louise. Maybe its not fair that Im living at all. Im no fucking Emo, but I have very strong thoughts that get me down sometimes. All I wanna do is go crazy and just break stuff. Ive always had to cope on my own, even when I was living with family. Even though Ive always relied on people for money, a place to stay and some company. Ive always appreciated the help they have given me. But all I get in return is to feel alone. Even now I have Jo...who else do I have, all my friends seem out of reach. I thought maybe when I moved down here things would be different, I would get closer to come of my friends down here. But I just cant seem to open up to anyone, its getting nigh on depressing. I miss my friends, I miss the REAL comfort, the REAL support and the REAL consideration. Why doesnt anyone give a damn about anyone. I know this reflects on Selinas LJ Entry, but Im feeling this way in general at this point in life. I can really relate to what shes said. *sigh* Im still all upset and confused...I dont suppose reading old entries in my LJ last night helped either. Today has been pretty shitty, the fact that Ive got no money doesnt help. Might ask whatever family gives a shit if they can put some money into my bank, to last me until next friday. Im gonna hate christmas...
It seems like no matter how much people like you, they always seem to be bothered by what you do. You're doing something thats not very fair. I mean, when you are with friends, shouldnt it just be about being with them, and not really caing what happens, unless of course, it involves something illegal. But friends should care about each other no matter what.
TEH FUCK!!!!!!!
EDIT: Maybe Im just chatting crap...but if anyone understands any of this, then at least I still have my sanity. I just cant really think clear...so Im just typing whatever Im thinking.. MEH!
Mainly ranting about the fact of people getting involved in other peoples situations. You know, people trying to ruin your happiness. What the rant above was about, if it made any sense, was about me staying with Jo.
Her Flatmates have said that Im taking the piss! With what, I help Jo with food etc thje best I can with the money I get. They wanna moan at me that they have to pay for the place and Im not. Do they have any clue where Im spending christmas, what sort of person I am. I cant believe that think they have the right to go expressing their upset. I hardly see them at all, about once or twice a week, for like 5 minutes, and thats when I happen to be cooking in the kitchen with Jo. I know and respect that they have to share the flat. But its not as if I am trying to be all friendly with them, I dont regard them as friends at all. Thats what gets me more annoyed, I dont even know them, and they think Im taking the piss staying with Jo. I mean what right have they got saying its unfair on Jo herself! I fucking know shes happy, thats why she wanted me down here in the first place.
*sigh* I really dont know why I bother sometimes...I feel like Ive got no where, no matter how many months have passed by. Im still getting rejected, disrepected and haunted. Haunted by emotions and situations that happened with Louise. They just keep creeping up on me, and I suppose that its not fair that I always cry to Jo and talk about the bad stuff that happened when I was with Louise. Maybe its not fair that Im living at all. Im no fucking Emo, but I have very strong thoughts that get me down sometimes. All I wanna do is go crazy and just break stuff. Ive always had to cope on my own, even when I was living with family. Even though Ive always relied on people for money, a place to stay and some company. Ive always appreciated the help they have given me. But all I get in return is to feel alone. Even now I have Jo...who else do I have, all my friends seem out of reach. I thought maybe when I moved down here things would be different, I would get closer to come of my friends down here. But I just cant seem to open up to anyone, its getting nigh on depressing. I miss my friends, I miss the REAL comfort, the REAL support and the REAL consideration. Why doesnt anyone give a damn about anyone. I know this reflects on Selinas LJ Entry, but Im feeling this way in general at this point in life. I can really relate to what shes said. *sigh* Im still all upset and confused...I dont suppose reading old entries in my LJ last night helped either. Today has been pretty shitty, the fact that Ive got no money doesnt help. Might ask whatever family gives a shit if they can put some money into my bank, to last me until next friday. Im gonna hate christmas...