Are You Deaf or Just Stupid?
A guy called in last night, just as my group from the NVAR showed up, and I spent probably ten minutes on the phone with him, wishing I could strangle him. Here was our conversation:
Idiot: How long does it take to get to your hotel from Park City, Utah? (Which is, uh... a completely different state. Why the hell did he think I'd know? Maybe he thinks being a hotel receptionist means I'm equipped with some internal GPS?)
Me: (guessing) About 4 hours, maybe?
Idiot: So it's north of Salt Lake? Or northwest?
Me: I'm not really sure, sorry.
Idiot: Well, do you have a pool?
Me: No.
Idiot: A spa?
Me: No.
Idiot: A business center?
Me: No.
Idiot: Okay then, what is your rate for one bed?
Me: I have room with a king bed for $89.99 plus tax.
Idiot: Really? Because I'm on the internet, and it says $80.
Me: (then why the fuck did you ask all those other questions when the answer was on the website you're looking at? I wouldn't have felt so annoyed if I hadn't had literally 15 people standing in front of me, waiting to check in) That might be an internet-only rate, sir, in which case you'd have to book it online.
Idiot: Nah, I'll just book with you.
Me: Okay then. (asks for information)
Idiot: (Giving me his very short and easy name, making sure to spell them out slowly)
Me: And your credit card number, please?
Idiot: (very long pause, then finally, the number)
Me: Okay, you're all set.
Idiot: And the confirmation number?
Me: 194207584
Idiot: Okay, I'm going to repeat that back to you. 294387-
Me: (Wtf, that's not even close) No, 194207584.
Idiot: What?
Me: 194207584!
Idiot: (silence)
Me: Hello?
Idiot: Okay, thanks, bye.
Me: (fucking finally)
At least the customers waiting in line were nice about it.
But this dude was even more annoying when he checked in, especially when I was giving him directions to his room.
Idiot: What was the number again?
Me: 215. Go through that middle hallway to get to the stairs. Once you get up the stairs, turn left. It's the first door on the left.
Idiot: Down THAT hallway? (points)
Me: No, through THAT hallway. (points)
Idiot: Okay. Because I have a stroller to carry up, and two little girls.
Me: We don't have an elevator, so would you prefer a first floor room? I don't have any kings on the first floor tonight, but I can give you a room with two queens.
Idiot: No, it's fine. So where is it again?
Me: (sighing inwardly) Go down THAT hallway. Turn right to get to the stairs. At the top of the stairs, turn left. It's the first door.
Idiot: So... go down that hall and turn right to get to the elevator?
Me: Uh, no. We don't have an elevator.
Idiot: Well, I want a first floor room, then.
I need booze. Now.