YJK Crack!Summaries :: Jedi Bounty
Part One
YJKs :: “You know, Lowie has been gone an awful long time, hidden away with this group we know is really nasty and likes to kill people, and we can’t contact him. Mayhaps something is wrong! We should investigate!”
Lusa :: “…..uhhhh….if you go they’ll sort of kill you.”
YJKs :: “WE CAN TAKE ‘EM!”
Lusa :: “…..don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Part Two
YJKs :: “Well, shit. Now we’ve been captured and are being used as slaves. Guess we should have listened to Lusa in the first place! BUT THAT’S OKAY, BECAUSE WE’LL JUST USE OUR MAD SKILLS TO ESCAPE!”
Escape :: *fails*
YJKs :: “…well, shit.”
Part Three
Jaina :: “Ho hum. Now I’m stuck with Raynar on a boiling hot slab of planet and we’re basically being roasted alive. But that’s okay, Raynar’s gonna need the practise in a few years anyway. DAMMIT ZEKK RESCUE ME. ;.;”
Zekk :: *charges to the rescue* *can find Jaina before LUKE can* *perhaps stalkerish, but that’s okay*
Jaina :: “YAY! *tries to climb into ship*”
Evil Nasty Dude :: *clings to her foot and tries to drag her back out*
Zekk :: “QUIT PLAYING AROUND BACK THERE!”
Jaina :: “…WTF ZEKK STFU.”
Raynar :: “OMG LUSA HELP.”
Lusa :: *sigh* “Y'all should’ve listened to me in the FIRST place…” *KICK*
Evil Nasty Dude :: *falls* *into lava* *POOF*
Jaina :: “Woo. That could have been bad. Boiling alive must really suck.”
Raynar :: *oblivious*
Part Four
Tenel Ka :: “Ah. Aha. It appears we have been stranded on the freezing side of the planet.”
Jacen :: *stares at her*
Tenel Ka :: “We should move before we freeze to death.”
Jacen :: *stares at her* “OPPORTUNITY! ZING!” *puts arms around her and pulls her close*
Tenel Ka :: *hugs back* “We will not grow any warmer by staying here.”
Jacen :: “Fat lot you know, woman. >>” *CLING*
Part Five
Tenel Ka :: “……yeah, we are definitely still stuck out here freezing our asses off. This is a fact.”
Jacen :: *CLING* “……wanna hear a joke?”
Tenel Ka :: “…..fact.”
Jacen :: “What side of the wampa creature has the most fur?”
Tenel Ka :: “I do not know, Jacen, my friend.”
Jacen :: “I TOLD YOU THIS BEFORE I KNOW I DID DAMMIT….BUT THAT’S OKAY! The outside.”
Tenel Ka :: *acts amused*
Jacen :: “OH GOD OH GOD HER BRAIN’S GOT FROSTBITE OH GOD.”
Part Six
Jacen and Tenel Ka :: *randomly snag a Twi’lek and haul his ass with them* “Woo! Dead weight! Like we’re not doomed enough already!”
Twi’lek :: “Let me fuckin’ die here, hors. I’m tired, yo.”
Jacen and Tenel Ka :: “No. >.>;; We don’t care if you AREN’T a Jedi and totally can’t do anything to regulate your body temperature, YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE.”
Twi’lek :: ;___;
Lowie :: *randomly flies overhead in ship*
Jacen :: “WOOOOO! WOOOOHOOOOO! WE’RE SO FUCKIN’ SAVED!!” *jumps up and down like a maniac*
Tenel Ka :: *calmly stands there and waves her lightsaber* *is not on speed*
Lowie :: *RESCUES!*
Jacen :: “Thank God. Except not, because at least when it was cold I got a chance to touch her without being smacked. THANKS A LOT LOWIE.”
EPILOGUE
Leia :: “ZOMG YOU COULD HAVE ALL BEEN KILLED.” *ADMONISHES*
Jaina :: *gets pissy* “WELL IF WE HADN’T GONE WE’D NOT HAVE KNOWN THESE PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO KILL THE ENTIRE HUMAN RACE SO PLEASE SHUT UP NOW.”
Leia :: O_O!
Jacen :: “Er. We, er. Didn’t mean to, er. Worry you. Er. Wtfe. Did I mention I totally got to hold onto Tenel Ka and she didn’t slap me?”
Lowie :: “And y’know, I totally love how ya’ll tried to rescue me and I had to save your asses instead.”