Fic: A Long December - 7/8
Fandom: NCIS
Title: A Long December - Chapter Six
Author: Starbucks Sue
Genre: General
Rating: FRM
Characters: Mainly Jethro Gibbs, Anthony DiNozzo with a few others making short appearances
Summary: On a snowy December morning a body turns up in an alley in DC. Will Gibbs and his new Field Agent Anthony DiNozzo be able to solve the case before Christmas?
Spoilers: Although this is set pre-series there are spoilers for those who have not seen the early episodes as information not known in the early seasons is used in this story. You will find the characters a little different than in the series as this is set two years prior to Yankee White and the relationships would naturally have evolved in that time.
I don't have a beta so please let me know if I have made any glaring errors!
This is a sequel to my previous story 'Raining in Baltimore' found here
Disclaimer: NCIS and the characters portrayed in this story do not belong to me and no copyright infringement is intended.
They were in early on Christmas Eve, ready for whenever Tucker’s lawyer turned up. Neither had got a good night’s sleep in the end. As Gibbs had expected, Tony woke several times from nightmares and was very subdued when he eventually woke in the morning.
When Tucker’s lawyer finally turned up it was almost 10:00 and by the time Gibbs had listed the evidence they had against him he’d broken down and confessed. As they had thought, it had started off as fun but Tucker admitted he got a little carried away and hadn’t realized that Paulson was in distress until it was too late. He’d panicked, stuffed Paulson’s body in his duffle and left the hotel. The weather had been on his side and he’d easily managed to dump Paulson’s body in the alley before taking off.
They managed to finish up the paperwork and their reports by 15:00 and Gibbs decided not to hang around. As the snow was still thick on the ground they’d left Tony’s Corvette safely in Gibbs’ garage while they came to work in Gibbs’ truck again.
“Hey Tony, you got anything planned for this evening. I could use your help with something if you’re free.” Gibbs looked across at Tony from his desk, wanting to see Tony’s reaction.
“Nope, I’m not doing anything.” Tony replied with a grin. “I think my baby prefers the warmth and safety of your garage this weather.”
“That’s good.” Gibbs grinned. “When you’ve finished your report we’ll get going, no reason to hang around here. They’ll call us if we’re needed.” Gibbs watched as Tony stood and collected his report from the printer before bringing it over.
“Here it is, Boss. Do you want to do a quick read through before I email it to you?” He handed it to Gibbs who quickly checked it through as Tony returned to his desk.
“Looks okay to me, email it over and I’ll forward them both to the Director. Be ready to go in five.”
“Sure, Boss.” Tony quickly attached the document to the email and a moment later Gibbs’ computer pinged softly, letting him know the report had arrived. Tony shut down his own machine and made his way to the head. With the amount of snow and it being Christmas Eve he knew the roads could be pretty chaotic, the usual twenty minute run to Gibbs’ house was likely to take much longer than usual.
By the time Tony returned, Gibbs had his coat on and was ready to go. Because of the holiday season both men were dressed down in jeans and sweatshirts which fitted in with Gibbs’ plans to take a detour on the way home to get what he wanted.
Originally his plans had been to surprise Tony with the tree, but remembering the fun he used to have taking Kelly to the farm so she could help choose the tree had him rethinking his plans and he wondered if Tony had ever had the fun of actually going to a tree farm and choosing a Christmas tree for himself. Not that he saw his subordinate as a child, but Tony had showed a childlike delight in so many things over the past few weeks that knowing what he knew of Tony’s childhood it really had Gibbs thinking about ways in which he could make this Christmas one that Tony could look back on with happy memories.
As they entered the elevator he looked over at Tony waiting for the inevitable questions. Tony was so like a kid sometimes, always questioning, always wanting to know why. Tony didn’t disappoint.
“So where are we going, Boss?” He asked, curiosity lighting up his eyes.
“Wait and see,” Gibbs answered with a grin, exiting the elevator and walking across the underground parking garage to his truck.
Tony ran to catch up with him. “Oh come on Gibbs, I said I’d help you. What can be so bad that you don’t want to tell me what I’ve agreed to help you with?” He stopped next to Gibbs as the older man unlocked the truck, concern etched on his face.
“It’s a surprise, DiNozzo, but not a nasty one. You want to spoil it?” Gibbs was quick to reassure even as he chuckled at the typical look of frustration on Tony’s face.
“Okay, Gibbs, I’ll take your word for it.” Tony shook his head as he rounded the truck and climbed in the passenger side.
Gibbs stopped on the way out of the Navy Yard, picking up a coffee for himself and hot chocolate for Tony, much to Tony’s surprise.
“Thanks, Jethro, and with whipped cream too.” Tony was genuinely surprised at the gesture. Gibbs had made him hot chocolate at home on several occasions in the evening but during the day it was always coffee.
“Yeah well, we’re not going straight home so you need to be warmed up before we get there.” He replied with a chuckle at the confusion on Tony’s face.
He drove out of Washington onto I-395 into Virginia, turning off onto the Little River Town Parkway. Tony was mystified but gave up asking questions when he realized that Gibbs wasn’t going to tell him. As Gibbs pulled into the Cedar Forest tree lot, Tony turned to him, a mixture of childish delight and confusion on his face.
“You’re getting a Christmas tree? I mean, somehow I didn’t see you as the holiday type,” Tony explained.
Gibbs understood Tony’s confusion, up until now he hadn’t mentioned anything about Christmas or shown any inclination of doing anything to celebrate the upcoming holiday.
“Yeah well, I don’t usually bother when it’s just me but seeing as I have someone to celebrate with this year I thought we’d get a tree and decorate it. Have you ever chosen and cut down you own tree before?”
Tony sat there stunned, suddenly realizing that Gibbs was doing this for him and felt the now familiar tightness in his throat as the emotions rose. He swallowed hard, not wanting Gibbs to know quite how choked he was at his host’s generosity.
“No, I’ve never done this. You know how my parents planned Christmas, it was more like a social event than an actual celebration. Since I left home I’ve never really done much to celebrate Christmas. I usually work over the holiday period, let those guys with families take the time off. Went to the early Mass on Christmas morning with Pete last year and had cold ham with trimmings that evening with him, most other Christmases I spent on my own, usually working or when I was at college I went skiing with a couple of my frat brothers but I’ve never really the kind of family Christmas that you see in the movies or in all the commercials,” Tony said wistfully.
“Come on then, let’s go find our tree.” Gibbs’ voice was gentle and encouraging as he climbed out of the truck.
Bearing in mind it was Christmas Eve there were still quite a few people who had chosen to leave it to the last minute to select their tree. As Gibbs walked over to the shed which was serving as an office for the lot a man in his forties came to meet him, a saw ready in his hand.
“Hi Tom? Jethro Gibbs, we spoke earlier.” The two men shook hands.
“You’re lucky, although I’m out of the firs; I’ve quite a few trees left to choose from. There’s Colorado Blue Spruce straight ahead, Norway Spruce to the left of the lot and behind the hut are Scotch and White Pine. Have a look around, you’ve got a few hours, I don’t close until ten.”
“Thanks Tom.” Gibbs took the saw and turned to Tony. “So any particular type of tree take your fancy?
“I have no idea, Gibbs, I really wouldn’t know what to choose. What would you recommend?” Tony looked at him completely at a loss.
“Well the Scotch Pine is a traditional tree, keeps its needles well even without water and has a traditional scent. Why don’t we go and look at those first and then take a look at the others and see what you think, there’s no rush, it’s only just after 17:00 now. Come on.” Gibbs walked towards the patch of Scotch Pine with Tony following eagerly.
An hour later and they were back to the Scotch Pine. Tony had to agree with Gibbs they were the most traditional looking Christmas tree and secretly it was exactly what Tony had always dreamed of.
“So which one then? Any of this group would be around the right size.” Gibbs estimated, looking closely at the group of eight remaining trees which he was pretty sure would fit in the den and just leave room for something on the top. He knew there was an angel in the box of decorations in the basement but the lot had a gift shop with some tree decorations, so he was going to let Tony choose some and knew that his young companion would probably go for something not quite as feminine.
“How about this one?” Tony asked shyly after walking around and studying the trees carefully. “It’s the right height and the branches are nice and evenly spaced.”
“Okay. Do you want to have a go at cutting it down?” Gibbs grinned in amusement at the horrified look on Tony’s face.
“Oh come on, Boss, I’ve never used a saw in my life, I’d probably kill the poor tree before we even got it out of the lot!” Tony exclaimed.
“No you wouldn’t. Let me start it off, then I’ll show you what to do and you can have a go. A joint effort.” Gibbs crouched down and carefully started cutting the tree off near the base, after a few minutes he stood. “Here, you try. Just crouch down like I was and keep up a push pull motion with the saw through the trunk. Try to keep your movements even. I’ll hold the tree.”
Tony started off with some trepidation, picking up the pace as he realized that it wasn’t as hard as he thought it would be. Years of being told he was no good at anything had made him hesitant to try something new, especially when he could do so much damage if he got it wrong. Silly as it seemed, he didn’t want the little tree to suffer from him screwing this up.
Soon they had the tree cut down and, with Tony sporting a beaming smile of triumph, carried it carefully between them as they returned to the hut. Tom quickly had the loose needles off and the tree netted and in the back off the truck for its journey home.
“Come on, let’s pop in the shop and see if there’s anything you like to get. What would you like to see on the top of the tree?” Gibbs led the way into the small shop, Tony following. The young man stopped, staring round, looking for all the world like the proverbial kid in a candy store.
Gibbs watched with a mixture of amusement and sorrow. Tony was thirty years old and yet he showed the same excitement that Kelly had when she was seven, which had been the last time she and Gibbs had come to pick their own tree and Gibbs realized how lucky he was to have been home for Christmas that year. Tony should have experienced this as a kid, with the innocence of a child who still believed in Father Christmas, elves and flying reindeer. Gibbs wondered if Tony had ever believed, somehow, from what he’d learned about DiNozzo Senior the man would never have had the imagination to dress up as Santa, put out milk and cookies for the man in red and leave presents in a stocking for his only child.
Gibbs left Tony to wander where he wanted. The small shop was crammed with decorations of all sorts, angels and star tree toppers, tinsel and hanging decorations. He finally walked over to where Tony was staring at some stars. Tony turned as he approached.
“What do you think of this one?” he pointed to a large silver star, intricately made of thin wire in a filigree design with tiny stars scattered across the surface, it was a classic star yet had a modern design. “The star was a sign of hope.” He finished quietly, uncertainty in both his voice and his eyes as he turned to Gibbs to see what the older man thought.
“It’s a good choice. I like it.” Gibbs smiled at his young companion, reaching up to pick one off the shelf to take a closer look. “Is this the one you want?”
Tony nodded, more confident now. “Yes please, I’ll pay for it.” He offered.
“No Tony, this is my treat. You keep saving your money; you’re going to need to furnish your apartment once you move in remember? Come on, is there anything else you want to get, I have got some decorations but they are pretty old so whatever else you want to get just say so. I rather like this garland, it’s not too long, how do you think it would look around the stair rail?”
They took the garland and walked back around the shop, picking up bits and pieces as they went along, soon they decided they had enough for the tree and to decorate the den so quickly paid for their purchases and returned to the truck. They were home in ten minutes and soon had the tree and decorations out of the truck and into the house. As Tony unpacked the carefully wrapped decorations Gibbs went down to the basement and brought up the tree stand and the box of decorations he had hunted out a few days beforehand.
He set the tree in the stand, unwrapping the netting and allowing the branches to spring into place. He twisted the tree a few times before finding an angle he was pleased with. Leaving Tony to explore the box of decorations he set about fixing the lights onto the tree so that he could leave Tony to decorate it as he wished.
Although he was keeping a straight face, Gibbs was secretly delighted. Tony’s reaction was more than he had hoped for, the look of wonderment kept creeping over Tony’s face, as if he still wasn’t sure whether this was really happening. His excitement and enthusiasm at the tree lot followed by his shy pleasure at being allowed to pick out decorations of his choosing more than made up for the cost of items which Gibbs was pretty sure would never see the light of day again.
Once the lights were displayed to his satisfaction Gibbs retired to the kitchen, leaving Tony slowly unpacking the box and laying everything out on the coffee table where he could choose what decorations to hang where.
Gibbs, meanwhile, had grabbed the cooked ham and prepared vegetables out of the fridge and quickly got everything on to cook. While the vegetables were cooking he collected the ingredients to make eggnog, it wasn’t something he usually bothered with but it was a tradition so he consented for Tony’s sake, Abby had assured him that he would like the recipe she had given him, it had JD in after all! By the time the vegetables were cooked, the eggnog was ready and slicing the ham, he added the hot vegetables and poured two glasses of eggnog, balancing them on a tray to carry through to the den. He and Tony usually ate at the table but tonight they would eat on their laps in front of the tree. He could hear Christmas music and wasn’t sure if Tony had found a radio station playing carols or if he had a CD with them on.
As he walked into the den he could see that Tony had been working hard. The tree was fully decorated, the little carved nativity set that Gibbs had made for Kelly’s first Christmas was arranged on top of the television, the candle arch was glowing in the window. Shannon had always loved the rustic folk art decorations and had purchased several larger santas and snowmen over the years, Tony had sat them around the room, the larger items on the floor and the others on the side tables, Gibbs felt his breath catch in his throat at the sight of them, he hadn’t had these out in years.
Tony turned to him as he entered the room, confusion written all over his face, in his hands he held two beautifully quilted red velvet stockings, one with the name ‘Kelly’ and one with ‘Shannon’ sewn on in green letters. Gibbs stopped and looked straight at the younger man, Tony stared back, anxiety showing clear in his eyes at Gibbs’ silence.
Gibbs moved forward as if nothing had happened. “Come on, let’s eat first and then I’ll explain.” He placed the tray on the table, removing his meal and drink and leaving Tony with the tray.
Tony was hesitant at first but seeing that Gibbs was okay sat down with his dinner and was soon tucking in hungrily.
“This is good Jethro, when did you get time to prepare all this?” he asked in surprise.
“Ducky’s got a friend whose brother is a butcher, he cooks these glazed hams at Christmas and I ordered this when I knew you would be here, we can’t eat takeout all the time you know, even if we are on call.” Gibbs grinned at him. “And I prepared the vegetables while you were still in bed this morning so they’d be ready for when we got in.”
“You had today planned out well didn’t you. What would have happened if the case had gone over or if something else had come up?”
“I spoke to Tom at Cedar Forest a couple of days ago, if we hadn’t got there he was going to pick out a Scotch Pine and cut it down for us and one of my neighbors was going to collect it for me, but I’m glad we got to do this, I didn’t think you’d ever done anything like it before and wanted to give you something good to remember about Christmas.” He looked over at Tony, seeing Tony’s eyes glistening with tears. “Hey, good memories bud, none of that.” He smiled as he said it, reassuring Tony that he wasn’t annoyed with the emotion he was openly displaying.
“They are good memories, Jethro; I just can’t believe that you’ve done all this for me,” Tony replied with a sniff. It’s just a lot to take in. Thank you.” A warm smile broke out on Tony’s face and the two men returned to finishing their meal. It wasn’t long before two clean and empty plates were stacked back on the tray and the men sat back with their eggnog.
Gibbs turned to Tony with a serious look on his face. “You know, over the past few weeks you’ve talked a lot about your past and your childhood. You have so many painful memories which you’ve shared with me and I know it can’t have been easy, especially for someone as private as you are. I’m humbled with the way you’ve trusted me enough to confide in me,” he stopped and stared into his glad. “In return I want to share some of my past with you. No-one at NCIS knows about this though, it isn’t something I talk about. Ever.”
He stood and took the plates out to the kitchen, returning with the jug of remaining eggnog which he quickly whisked up again before refilling their glasses.
“I was born and brought up in a small Pennsylvania town called Stillwater. I was an only child and had a happy childhood until my mother died when I was fourteen. My father and I had our ups and downs but I wanted to rebel and he just wanted what he thought was best for me. I joined the Marines as soon as I could and on the day I left Stillwater I met a girl at the station, I’d seen her before as she worked in the ladies fashion shop in the town but we’d never spoken before. We introduced ourselves at the station and spent the whole of the train journey to New York getting to know each other better, before we parted we swapped details. She was going to live with her aunt in Jersey City and work in New York, so she gave me the address. Her name was Shannon.
We kept in touch and whenever I could I visited Shannon. We married in 1981 and in 1985 our daughter Kelly was born. At the time we were living in base housing in Norfolk but I didn’t want Kelly to be a military brat so with the money we had saved up, and a small inheritance Shannon received from her grandfather, we brought this house.” He stopped to take a drink. Tony sat in silence, he couldn’t begin to imagine where this was leading but just knew that, somehow, it was going to end in tragedy.
In 1992 I was in Kuwait, unfortunately Shannon witnessed something she shouldn’t have seen while she was visiting another wife on base and she and Kelly were taken into protective custody. One day while they were being driven home, a gunman took out the driver of their car. They died in the resulting crash.” He stopped again, staring into his drink and taking a few moments to collect himself.
“When the chaplain notified me I was beside myself. He made arrangements for me to fly home for their funerals. As soon as I could I flew back and rejoined my unit, there was nothing left for me here. A few weeks later during Desert Storm I was caught in an explosion, I was in a coma for several days, I believe that during that time I was making a decision whether to live or to die. When I awoke it was like I lost Shannon and Kelly all over again.
Once I had recovered enough they flew me to Bethesda, when I was released from hospital I contacted the NIS Agent who was working on Shannon and Kelly’s case, by that time he knew who had killed them but they hadn’t found enough proof to arrest him. The NIS Agent, Mike Franks, wouldn’t tell me who he was, but he went to the head and got coffee on the way back, leaving the file on his desk. I took a little hiatus at that point, by the time I returned the man who killed my wife and daughter was dead and Franks persuaded me to join NIS. That was nine years ago.”
He fell silent, lost in his memories until a wet sniff disturbed his ruminations. He turned to Tony, dismayed to see tears spilling down his companion’s cheeks. Tony looked down quickly, trying to control his emotions.
“Hey, this wasn’t meant to upset you.” Gibbs reached out and tapped Tony under the chin, raising his face so they were eye to eye again.
“Hell, Jethro, how do you deal with it? How do you ever get over something like that?” Tony’s voice wasn’t quite steady and he ran the back of his hand over his cheeks self-consciously.
“You don’t, Tony. It’s not something you ever get over. It still hurts every time I think of them. It’s why I don’t talk about them or let anyone know. I don’t want anyone’s pity and that’s what I was getting from the people who knew, so I made the decision to put the past behind me and leave it there.”
“And you haven’t celebrated the holidays since then, until now, when you’ve brought this all out for me,” Tony sighed deeply. “Life really isn’t fair is it, my mother died and my father was stuck with me, a kid, unwanted and unloved. Yet here were you, with all the love in the world for your kid and you lost her. Damn it, Gibbs, you must have been a wonderful father. You’ve been more of a father to me in the past few weeks than my father ever was, I can only imagine what you must have been like with your own flesh and blood. You’ve been there every time I woke from a nightmare, the only time I ever ran to my own parents my mother was so drunk she didn’t even wake up and my father sent me back to bed telling me how ashamed he was to have a son who was so weak, I was five years old,” Tony recounted softly. “Thank you, Jethro. This meant a lot to me before, it means even more now.” He finished his drink and placed the glass on the coffee table.
“You’re welcome, Tony, it’s nice to have someone to share it all with again. Now, go and get ready, we’re going out.” He rose and collected the glasses, taking them into the kitchen to rinse out.
“Out, at this time of night? Where on earth…oh!” Tony followed Gibbs into the kitchen, eyes gleaming with anticipation. “Midnight Mass?” He whispered. He’d always wanted to go as a child but his parents had never let him, even after he left home he hadn’t attended, never wanting to go on his own. To the child it had always seemed something magical, the mere thought of actually attending at last sent a chill of anticipation down his spine.
Gibbs noticed and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, I just hope you’re not going to be disappointed,” he said gently. “Come on, go get ready and wrap up warm, it’s cold out there.”
Ten minutes later they were heading out into the snowy night. The sky was clear and the stars shone in the sky, with the moon reflecting off the snow on the ground. To Tony it was magical, the night was perfect, just the kind of Christmas Eve he had always imagined, turning out of a warm house and into the cold snow heading for Midnight Mass. But unlike his dreams, he was actually sharing this with someone who wanted to do this for him. He shivered again, unsure of whether it was from cold or anticipation and climbed into the truck. Gibbs drove carefully, the roads were icy and slippery, but it still wasn’t long before he was pulling up outside The Queen of Apostles Catholic Church. It was a modern building, the warm lights spilling out welcoming the people who were entering. They walked towards the entrance and, seeing the tension on Tony’s face, Gibbs placed a hand on his shoulder, calming him.
Greeters welcomed them as they entered the foyer, handing out booklets printed especially for the occasion. Tony dipped his fingers automatically in the holy water font which was located in front of the doors into the nave. As they entered the darkened nave of the church Tony looked around in awe, the main lights had been dimmed and candles had been lit all the way around. Gibbs placed his hand on Tony’s back, encouraging him forward and they found space in a pew halfway down the nave. There was a definitely a sense of anticipation in the air and Tony looked at Gibbs, half in excitement and half in anticipation as they listened to the hushed sounds of people talking quietly.
Once again Gibbs was reminded of his daughter, Tony had exactly the same look as Kelly had when she was taken somewhere special for the first time. The young man was staring round, noticing the crib in one corner and a Christmas tree in another. People were entering thick and fast now and Gibbs was pretty sure the church would be full to bursting before long.
Sure enough, by the time the bell signaled the start of the Mass there were people standing at the back of the nave and along the edges of the side aisles, just leaving enough room for the procession of servers, deacon and priest. They stood at the bell and as the strains of ‘O Come All Ye Faithful’ filled the church they turned to their service booklets and added their voices to those of the choir and congregation.
Title: A Long December - Chapter Six
Author: Starbucks Sue
Genre: General
Rating: FRM
Characters: Mainly Jethro Gibbs, Anthony DiNozzo with a few others making short appearances
Summary: On a snowy December morning a body turns up in an alley in DC. Will Gibbs and his new Field Agent Anthony DiNozzo be able to solve the case before Christmas?
Spoilers: Although this is set pre-series there are spoilers for those who have not seen the early episodes as information not known in the early seasons is used in this story. You will find the characters a little different than in the series as this is set two years prior to Yankee White and the relationships would naturally have evolved in that time.
I don't have a beta so please let me know if I have made any glaring errors!
This is a sequel to my previous story 'Raining in Baltimore' found here
Disclaimer: NCIS and the characters portrayed in this story do not belong to me and no copyright infringement is intended.
They were in early on Christmas Eve, ready for whenever Tucker’s lawyer turned up. Neither had got a good night’s sleep in the end. As Gibbs had expected, Tony woke several times from nightmares and was very subdued when he eventually woke in the morning.
When Tucker’s lawyer finally turned up it was almost 10:00 and by the time Gibbs had listed the evidence they had against him he’d broken down and confessed. As they had thought, it had started off as fun but Tucker admitted he got a little carried away and hadn’t realized that Paulson was in distress until it was too late. He’d panicked, stuffed Paulson’s body in his duffle and left the hotel. The weather had been on his side and he’d easily managed to dump Paulson’s body in the alley before taking off.
They managed to finish up the paperwork and their reports by 15:00 and Gibbs decided not to hang around. As the snow was still thick on the ground they’d left Tony’s Corvette safely in Gibbs’ garage while they came to work in Gibbs’ truck again.
“Hey Tony, you got anything planned for this evening. I could use your help with something if you’re free.” Gibbs looked across at Tony from his desk, wanting to see Tony’s reaction.
“Nope, I’m not doing anything.” Tony replied with a grin. “I think my baby prefers the warmth and safety of your garage this weather.”
“That’s good.” Gibbs grinned. “When you’ve finished your report we’ll get going, no reason to hang around here. They’ll call us if we’re needed.” Gibbs watched as Tony stood and collected his report from the printer before bringing it over.
“Here it is, Boss. Do you want to do a quick read through before I email it to you?” He handed it to Gibbs who quickly checked it through as Tony returned to his desk.
“Looks okay to me, email it over and I’ll forward them both to the Director. Be ready to go in five.”
“Sure, Boss.” Tony quickly attached the document to the email and a moment later Gibbs’ computer pinged softly, letting him know the report had arrived. Tony shut down his own machine and made his way to the head. With the amount of snow and it being Christmas Eve he knew the roads could be pretty chaotic, the usual twenty minute run to Gibbs’ house was likely to take much longer than usual.
By the time Tony returned, Gibbs had his coat on and was ready to go. Because of the holiday season both men were dressed down in jeans and sweatshirts which fitted in with Gibbs’ plans to take a detour on the way home to get what he wanted.
Originally his plans had been to surprise Tony with the tree, but remembering the fun he used to have taking Kelly to the farm so she could help choose the tree had him rethinking his plans and he wondered if Tony had ever had the fun of actually going to a tree farm and choosing a Christmas tree for himself. Not that he saw his subordinate as a child, but Tony had showed a childlike delight in so many things over the past few weeks that knowing what he knew of Tony’s childhood it really had Gibbs thinking about ways in which he could make this Christmas one that Tony could look back on with happy memories.
As they entered the elevator he looked over at Tony waiting for the inevitable questions. Tony was so like a kid sometimes, always questioning, always wanting to know why. Tony didn’t disappoint.
“So where are we going, Boss?” He asked, curiosity lighting up his eyes.
“Wait and see,” Gibbs answered with a grin, exiting the elevator and walking across the underground parking garage to his truck.
Tony ran to catch up with him. “Oh come on Gibbs, I said I’d help you. What can be so bad that you don’t want to tell me what I’ve agreed to help you with?” He stopped next to Gibbs as the older man unlocked the truck, concern etched on his face.
“It’s a surprise, DiNozzo, but not a nasty one. You want to spoil it?” Gibbs was quick to reassure even as he chuckled at the typical look of frustration on Tony’s face.
“Okay, Gibbs, I’ll take your word for it.” Tony shook his head as he rounded the truck and climbed in the passenger side.
Gibbs stopped on the way out of the Navy Yard, picking up a coffee for himself and hot chocolate for Tony, much to Tony’s surprise.
“Thanks, Jethro, and with whipped cream too.” Tony was genuinely surprised at the gesture. Gibbs had made him hot chocolate at home on several occasions in the evening but during the day it was always coffee.
“Yeah well, we’re not going straight home so you need to be warmed up before we get there.” He replied with a chuckle at the confusion on Tony’s face.
He drove out of Washington onto I-395 into Virginia, turning off onto the Little River Town Parkway. Tony was mystified but gave up asking questions when he realized that Gibbs wasn’t going to tell him. As Gibbs pulled into the Cedar Forest tree lot, Tony turned to him, a mixture of childish delight and confusion on his face.
“You’re getting a Christmas tree? I mean, somehow I didn’t see you as the holiday type,” Tony explained.
Gibbs understood Tony’s confusion, up until now he hadn’t mentioned anything about Christmas or shown any inclination of doing anything to celebrate the upcoming holiday.
“Yeah well, I don’t usually bother when it’s just me but seeing as I have someone to celebrate with this year I thought we’d get a tree and decorate it. Have you ever chosen and cut down you own tree before?”
Tony sat there stunned, suddenly realizing that Gibbs was doing this for him and felt the now familiar tightness in his throat as the emotions rose. He swallowed hard, not wanting Gibbs to know quite how choked he was at his host’s generosity.
“No, I’ve never done this. You know how my parents planned Christmas, it was more like a social event than an actual celebration. Since I left home I’ve never really done much to celebrate Christmas. I usually work over the holiday period, let those guys with families take the time off. Went to the early Mass on Christmas morning with Pete last year and had cold ham with trimmings that evening with him, most other Christmases I spent on my own, usually working or when I was at college I went skiing with a couple of my frat brothers but I’ve never really the kind of family Christmas that you see in the movies or in all the commercials,” Tony said wistfully.
“Come on then, let’s go find our tree.” Gibbs’ voice was gentle and encouraging as he climbed out of the truck.
Bearing in mind it was Christmas Eve there were still quite a few people who had chosen to leave it to the last minute to select their tree. As Gibbs walked over to the shed which was serving as an office for the lot a man in his forties came to meet him, a saw ready in his hand.
“Hi Tom? Jethro Gibbs, we spoke earlier.” The two men shook hands.
“You’re lucky, although I’m out of the firs; I’ve quite a few trees left to choose from. There’s Colorado Blue Spruce straight ahead, Norway Spruce to the left of the lot and behind the hut are Scotch and White Pine. Have a look around, you’ve got a few hours, I don’t close until ten.”
“Thanks Tom.” Gibbs took the saw and turned to Tony. “So any particular type of tree take your fancy?
“I have no idea, Gibbs, I really wouldn’t know what to choose. What would you recommend?” Tony looked at him completely at a loss.
“Well the Scotch Pine is a traditional tree, keeps its needles well even without water and has a traditional scent. Why don’t we go and look at those first and then take a look at the others and see what you think, there’s no rush, it’s only just after 17:00 now. Come on.” Gibbs walked towards the patch of Scotch Pine with Tony following eagerly.
An hour later and they were back to the Scotch Pine. Tony had to agree with Gibbs they were the most traditional looking Christmas tree and secretly it was exactly what Tony had always dreamed of.
“So which one then? Any of this group would be around the right size.” Gibbs estimated, looking closely at the group of eight remaining trees which he was pretty sure would fit in the den and just leave room for something on the top. He knew there was an angel in the box of decorations in the basement but the lot had a gift shop with some tree decorations, so he was going to let Tony choose some and knew that his young companion would probably go for something not quite as feminine.
“How about this one?” Tony asked shyly after walking around and studying the trees carefully. “It’s the right height and the branches are nice and evenly spaced.”
“Okay. Do you want to have a go at cutting it down?” Gibbs grinned in amusement at the horrified look on Tony’s face.
“Oh come on, Boss, I’ve never used a saw in my life, I’d probably kill the poor tree before we even got it out of the lot!” Tony exclaimed.
“No you wouldn’t. Let me start it off, then I’ll show you what to do and you can have a go. A joint effort.” Gibbs crouched down and carefully started cutting the tree off near the base, after a few minutes he stood. “Here, you try. Just crouch down like I was and keep up a push pull motion with the saw through the trunk. Try to keep your movements even. I’ll hold the tree.”
Tony started off with some trepidation, picking up the pace as he realized that it wasn’t as hard as he thought it would be. Years of being told he was no good at anything had made him hesitant to try something new, especially when he could do so much damage if he got it wrong. Silly as it seemed, he didn’t want the little tree to suffer from him screwing this up.
Soon they had the tree cut down and, with Tony sporting a beaming smile of triumph, carried it carefully between them as they returned to the hut. Tom quickly had the loose needles off and the tree netted and in the back off the truck for its journey home.
“Come on, let’s pop in the shop and see if there’s anything you like to get. What would you like to see on the top of the tree?” Gibbs led the way into the small shop, Tony following. The young man stopped, staring round, looking for all the world like the proverbial kid in a candy store.
Gibbs watched with a mixture of amusement and sorrow. Tony was thirty years old and yet he showed the same excitement that Kelly had when she was seven, which had been the last time she and Gibbs had come to pick their own tree and Gibbs realized how lucky he was to have been home for Christmas that year. Tony should have experienced this as a kid, with the innocence of a child who still believed in Father Christmas, elves and flying reindeer. Gibbs wondered if Tony had ever believed, somehow, from what he’d learned about DiNozzo Senior the man would never have had the imagination to dress up as Santa, put out milk and cookies for the man in red and leave presents in a stocking for his only child.
Gibbs left Tony to wander where he wanted. The small shop was crammed with decorations of all sorts, angels and star tree toppers, tinsel and hanging decorations. He finally walked over to where Tony was staring at some stars. Tony turned as he approached.
“What do you think of this one?” he pointed to a large silver star, intricately made of thin wire in a filigree design with tiny stars scattered across the surface, it was a classic star yet had a modern design. “The star was a sign of hope.” He finished quietly, uncertainty in both his voice and his eyes as he turned to Gibbs to see what the older man thought.
“It’s a good choice. I like it.” Gibbs smiled at his young companion, reaching up to pick one off the shelf to take a closer look. “Is this the one you want?”
Tony nodded, more confident now. “Yes please, I’ll pay for it.” He offered.
“No Tony, this is my treat. You keep saving your money; you’re going to need to furnish your apartment once you move in remember? Come on, is there anything else you want to get, I have got some decorations but they are pretty old so whatever else you want to get just say so. I rather like this garland, it’s not too long, how do you think it would look around the stair rail?”
They took the garland and walked back around the shop, picking up bits and pieces as they went along, soon they decided they had enough for the tree and to decorate the den so quickly paid for their purchases and returned to the truck. They were home in ten minutes and soon had the tree and decorations out of the truck and into the house. As Tony unpacked the carefully wrapped decorations Gibbs went down to the basement and brought up the tree stand and the box of decorations he had hunted out a few days beforehand.
He set the tree in the stand, unwrapping the netting and allowing the branches to spring into place. He twisted the tree a few times before finding an angle he was pleased with. Leaving Tony to explore the box of decorations he set about fixing the lights onto the tree so that he could leave Tony to decorate it as he wished.
Although he was keeping a straight face, Gibbs was secretly delighted. Tony’s reaction was more than he had hoped for, the look of wonderment kept creeping over Tony’s face, as if he still wasn’t sure whether this was really happening. His excitement and enthusiasm at the tree lot followed by his shy pleasure at being allowed to pick out decorations of his choosing more than made up for the cost of items which Gibbs was pretty sure would never see the light of day again.
Once the lights were displayed to his satisfaction Gibbs retired to the kitchen, leaving Tony slowly unpacking the box and laying everything out on the coffee table where he could choose what decorations to hang where.
Gibbs, meanwhile, had grabbed the cooked ham and prepared vegetables out of the fridge and quickly got everything on to cook. While the vegetables were cooking he collected the ingredients to make eggnog, it wasn’t something he usually bothered with but it was a tradition so he consented for Tony’s sake, Abby had assured him that he would like the recipe she had given him, it had JD in after all! By the time the vegetables were cooked, the eggnog was ready and slicing the ham, he added the hot vegetables and poured two glasses of eggnog, balancing them on a tray to carry through to the den. He and Tony usually ate at the table but tonight they would eat on their laps in front of the tree. He could hear Christmas music and wasn’t sure if Tony had found a radio station playing carols or if he had a CD with them on.
As he walked into the den he could see that Tony had been working hard. The tree was fully decorated, the little carved nativity set that Gibbs had made for Kelly’s first Christmas was arranged on top of the television, the candle arch was glowing in the window. Shannon had always loved the rustic folk art decorations and had purchased several larger santas and snowmen over the years, Tony had sat them around the room, the larger items on the floor and the others on the side tables, Gibbs felt his breath catch in his throat at the sight of them, he hadn’t had these out in years.
Tony turned to him as he entered the room, confusion written all over his face, in his hands he held two beautifully quilted red velvet stockings, one with the name ‘Kelly’ and one with ‘Shannon’ sewn on in green letters. Gibbs stopped and looked straight at the younger man, Tony stared back, anxiety showing clear in his eyes at Gibbs’ silence.
Gibbs moved forward as if nothing had happened. “Come on, let’s eat first and then I’ll explain.” He placed the tray on the table, removing his meal and drink and leaving Tony with the tray.
Tony was hesitant at first but seeing that Gibbs was okay sat down with his dinner and was soon tucking in hungrily.
“This is good Jethro, when did you get time to prepare all this?” he asked in surprise.
“Ducky’s got a friend whose brother is a butcher, he cooks these glazed hams at Christmas and I ordered this when I knew you would be here, we can’t eat takeout all the time you know, even if we are on call.” Gibbs grinned at him. “And I prepared the vegetables while you were still in bed this morning so they’d be ready for when we got in.”
“You had today planned out well didn’t you. What would have happened if the case had gone over or if something else had come up?”
“I spoke to Tom at Cedar Forest a couple of days ago, if we hadn’t got there he was going to pick out a Scotch Pine and cut it down for us and one of my neighbors was going to collect it for me, but I’m glad we got to do this, I didn’t think you’d ever done anything like it before and wanted to give you something good to remember about Christmas.” He looked over at Tony, seeing Tony’s eyes glistening with tears. “Hey, good memories bud, none of that.” He smiled as he said it, reassuring Tony that he wasn’t annoyed with the emotion he was openly displaying.
“They are good memories, Jethro; I just can’t believe that you’ve done all this for me,” Tony replied with a sniff. It’s just a lot to take in. Thank you.” A warm smile broke out on Tony’s face and the two men returned to finishing their meal. It wasn’t long before two clean and empty plates were stacked back on the tray and the men sat back with their eggnog.
Gibbs turned to Tony with a serious look on his face. “You know, over the past few weeks you’ve talked a lot about your past and your childhood. You have so many painful memories which you’ve shared with me and I know it can’t have been easy, especially for someone as private as you are. I’m humbled with the way you’ve trusted me enough to confide in me,” he stopped and stared into his glad. “In return I want to share some of my past with you. No-one at NCIS knows about this though, it isn’t something I talk about. Ever.”
He stood and took the plates out to the kitchen, returning with the jug of remaining eggnog which he quickly whisked up again before refilling their glasses.
“I was born and brought up in a small Pennsylvania town called Stillwater. I was an only child and had a happy childhood until my mother died when I was fourteen. My father and I had our ups and downs but I wanted to rebel and he just wanted what he thought was best for me. I joined the Marines as soon as I could and on the day I left Stillwater I met a girl at the station, I’d seen her before as she worked in the ladies fashion shop in the town but we’d never spoken before. We introduced ourselves at the station and spent the whole of the train journey to New York getting to know each other better, before we parted we swapped details. She was going to live with her aunt in Jersey City and work in New York, so she gave me the address. Her name was Shannon.
We kept in touch and whenever I could I visited Shannon. We married in 1981 and in 1985 our daughter Kelly was born. At the time we were living in base housing in Norfolk but I didn’t want Kelly to be a military brat so with the money we had saved up, and a small inheritance Shannon received from her grandfather, we brought this house.” He stopped to take a drink. Tony sat in silence, he couldn’t begin to imagine where this was leading but just knew that, somehow, it was going to end in tragedy.
In 1992 I was in Kuwait, unfortunately Shannon witnessed something she shouldn’t have seen while she was visiting another wife on base and she and Kelly were taken into protective custody. One day while they were being driven home, a gunman took out the driver of their car. They died in the resulting crash.” He stopped again, staring into his drink and taking a few moments to collect himself.
“When the chaplain notified me I was beside myself. He made arrangements for me to fly home for their funerals. As soon as I could I flew back and rejoined my unit, there was nothing left for me here. A few weeks later during Desert Storm I was caught in an explosion, I was in a coma for several days, I believe that during that time I was making a decision whether to live or to die. When I awoke it was like I lost Shannon and Kelly all over again.
Once I had recovered enough they flew me to Bethesda, when I was released from hospital I contacted the NIS Agent who was working on Shannon and Kelly’s case, by that time he knew who had killed them but they hadn’t found enough proof to arrest him. The NIS Agent, Mike Franks, wouldn’t tell me who he was, but he went to the head and got coffee on the way back, leaving the file on his desk. I took a little hiatus at that point, by the time I returned the man who killed my wife and daughter was dead and Franks persuaded me to join NIS. That was nine years ago.”
He fell silent, lost in his memories until a wet sniff disturbed his ruminations. He turned to Tony, dismayed to see tears spilling down his companion’s cheeks. Tony looked down quickly, trying to control his emotions.
“Hey, this wasn’t meant to upset you.” Gibbs reached out and tapped Tony under the chin, raising his face so they were eye to eye again.
“Hell, Jethro, how do you deal with it? How do you ever get over something like that?” Tony’s voice wasn’t quite steady and he ran the back of his hand over his cheeks self-consciously.
“You don’t, Tony. It’s not something you ever get over. It still hurts every time I think of them. It’s why I don’t talk about them or let anyone know. I don’t want anyone’s pity and that’s what I was getting from the people who knew, so I made the decision to put the past behind me and leave it there.”
“And you haven’t celebrated the holidays since then, until now, when you’ve brought this all out for me,” Tony sighed deeply. “Life really isn’t fair is it, my mother died and my father was stuck with me, a kid, unwanted and unloved. Yet here were you, with all the love in the world for your kid and you lost her. Damn it, Gibbs, you must have been a wonderful father. You’ve been more of a father to me in the past few weeks than my father ever was, I can only imagine what you must have been like with your own flesh and blood. You’ve been there every time I woke from a nightmare, the only time I ever ran to my own parents my mother was so drunk she didn’t even wake up and my father sent me back to bed telling me how ashamed he was to have a son who was so weak, I was five years old,” Tony recounted softly. “Thank you, Jethro. This meant a lot to me before, it means even more now.” He finished his drink and placed the glass on the coffee table.
“You’re welcome, Tony, it’s nice to have someone to share it all with again. Now, go and get ready, we’re going out.” He rose and collected the glasses, taking them into the kitchen to rinse out.
“Out, at this time of night? Where on earth…oh!” Tony followed Gibbs into the kitchen, eyes gleaming with anticipation. “Midnight Mass?” He whispered. He’d always wanted to go as a child but his parents had never let him, even after he left home he hadn’t attended, never wanting to go on his own. To the child it had always seemed something magical, the mere thought of actually attending at last sent a chill of anticipation down his spine.
Gibbs noticed and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, I just hope you’re not going to be disappointed,” he said gently. “Come on, go get ready and wrap up warm, it’s cold out there.”
Ten minutes later they were heading out into the snowy night. The sky was clear and the stars shone in the sky, with the moon reflecting off the snow on the ground. To Tony it was magical, the night was perfect, just the kind of Christmas Eve he had always imagined, turning out of a warm house and into the cold snow heading for Midnight Mass. But unlike his dreams, he was actually sharing this with someone who wanted to do this for him. He shivered again, unsure of whether it was from cold or anticipation and climbed into the truck. Gibbs drove carefully, the roads were icy and slippery, but it still wasn’t long before he was pulling up outside The Queen of Apostles Catholic Church. It was a modern building, the warm lights spilling out welcoming the people who were entering. They walked towards the entrance and, seeing the tension on Tony’s face, Gibbs placed a hand on his shoulder, calming him.
Greeters welcomed them as they entered the foyer, handing out booklets printed especially for the occasion. Tony dipped his fingers automatically in the holy water font which was located in front of the doors into the nave. As they entered the darkened nave of the church Tony looked around in awe, the main lights had been dimmed and candles had been lit all the way around. Gibbs placed his hand on Tony’s back, encouraging him forward and they found space in a pew halfway down the nave. There was a definitely a sense of anticipation in the air and Tony looked at Gibbs, half in excitement and half in anticipation as they listened to the hushed sounds of people talking quietly.
Once again Gibbs was reminded of his daughter, Tony had exactly the same look as Kelly had when she was taken somewhere special for the first time. The young man was staring round, noticing the crib in one corner and a Christmas tree in another. People were entering thick and fast now and Gibbs was pretty sure the church would be full to bursting before long.
Sure enough, by the time the bell signaled the start of the Mass there were people standing at the back of the nave and along the edges of the side aisles, just leaving enough room for the procession of servers, deacon and priest. They stood at the bell and as the strains of ‘O Come All Ye Faithful’ filled the church they turned to their service booklets and added their voices to those of the choir and congregation.