I have no time now, to stop and explain
I was planning on updating about tour, and I had an entry saved and almost finished- but I'm kind of over it at this point. To sum it up, tour was an awesome time, and I will be visiting DC again this summer- definitely. I really wish I could have seen Chris when I was there, but it was a bit too much craziness. Chris: We definitely need to hang out when you come back! Overall it was a very emotionally and physically draining trip but I discovered a lot about myself, others, and about the world around me- and it was very refreshing/beneficial.
So today after 6th hour I had a break down. Yesterday when we started "Movin' On" I got a bit teared up, and knew I was going to be a wreck at the concert. Little did I know that today it would hit in almost full force. Perhaps the thinking I've done about "moving on" in the past 24 hours caused it... who knows. I was fine in the first couple of verses, no full force tears... but then after the song I had to go over and give Eden a hug (we just needed to) and that is when they started. As soon as she said "I'm going to miss you so much" I just lost it (and am getting a bit teared up now just recalling it). I've had so many amazing experiences with the choir, and with people at Churchill in general this year. We've all been through SO much together, and looking around the room and realizing that next year they would all be gone was really hard on me. Everyone has just been so nice to me, and I've bonded so much with people I have met just 8 months ago. I have grown quite attached, it seems. It was also hard thinking about how in a year I would be in their place, on the brink of entering the world as an adult- and I'm scared. I get chills just thinking about how vulnerable I am going to become. Do I have what it takes? Am I going to be successful? Am I just a dreamer? At times, these thoughts consume my mind. I love everyone so much, truly love, and I thank God for all of the wonderful people He has put into my life. The world and its people are so full of intrinsic beauty, and I hope to come to appreciate all of it.
I might be seeing Rossini's "Cinderella" tomorrow night. :-D yay.
Wow, I'm tired.
Goodnight.
So today after 6th hour I had a break down. Yesterday when we started "Movin' On" I got a bit teared up, and knew I was going to be a wreck at the concert. Little did I know that today it would hit in almost full force. Perhaps the thinking I've done about "moving on" in the past 24 hours caused it... who knows. I was fine in the first couple of verses, no full force tears... but then after the song I had to go over and give Eden a hug (we just needed to) and that is when they started. As soon as she said "I'm going to miss you so much" I just lost it (and am getting a bit teared up now just recalling it). I've had so many amazing experiences with the choir, and with people at Churchill in general this year. We've all been through SO much together, and looking around the room and realizing that next year they would all be gone was really hard on me. Everyone has just been so nice to me, and I've bonded so much with people I have met just 8 months ago. I have grown quite attached, it seems. It was also hard thinking about how in a year I would be in their place, on the brink of entering the world as an adult- and I'm scared. I get chills just thinking about how vulnerable I am going to become. Do I have what it takes? Am I going to be successful? Am I just a dreamer? At times, these thoughts consume my mind. I love everyone so much, truly love, and I thank God for all of the wonderful people He has put into my life. The world and its people are so full of intrinsic beauty, and I hope to come to appreciate all of it.
I might be seeing Rossini's "Cinderella" tomorrow night. :-D yay.
Wow, I'm tired.
Goodnight.