Thoughts on social class and me
(This might be really boring, but the thoughts want out.)
We had an assignment where we traveled to certain selected stations on the Stockholm underground and observed them from a class perspective. The assignment and discussion in class afterwards also touched on our own class background and how it affects our perception of different places.
This was interesting to me because growing up I never really developed any conscious idea of class. Probably because I lived in the same area until after upper secondary and was essentially part of the "normal" there. Lower middle class I suppose, if I had to set a word to it?
Dad worked as a chemist (until some years ago) in a stable job and mom as a home daycarer for the community, me and my three siblings lived in a rented three bedroom apartment that my parents later bought. The house itself was one of three similar ones around a playground, in a relatively small village right outside the capital area, with three elementary schools, two grocery stores, a hairdresser and a pub/restaurant or two.
Later in life, I found out it had a bad reputation as a place with drunks and addicts and violence, but by then I'd already moved away. Maybe I was just an oblivious child, but as a preteen I used to go on walks in the middle of the night and was never scared (that was before I learned that as a woman I am never safe, but that's another thing).
Yet, despite not having any strong feeling of belonging in a certain class, I do feel more or less out of place in certain contexts. For example, when we visited the very luxurious shopping center at Karlaplan on the course of the assignment, where most patrons were visibly middle-upper class, and even the grocery store was stylishly decorated, I felt like I stuck out, that I should have been better dressed or just. Someone else. And in our second place at a trendy area with rushing traffic I could mostly perceive it as a place that I might pass through quite comfortably, but couldn't really visualize being part of the culture itself.
The place I felt most at home was our last stop at Hallunda, with it's shopping center with its outlet stores and cheap interior decoration. And thinking back, my family would have gone to places like that, or to middle class big chain markets, whereas the world of fancy upscale stores was completely foreign to us. If you wanted something fancier, you looked for it at the flea market. Which, one can make really cool finds second hand, don't think I'm putting them down. My point is, that's the way I've learned to function from my family (and current economic limitations for that matter). Probably only enforced by the fact that my parents' background was if anything probably lower down on the class ladder, so even if they had extra money they were probably prone to be a bit careful with it.
I talked to another girl about this, who said her family had a very definite working class identity, which I thought was interesting because my own was so undefined. She pointed out that in her family's case part of it was that they were actually quite wealthy, and in a way had to, one could say, actively work to retain their identity against the realities of their life which went against it. Which often seems to be the case with identities, they become stronger with... resistance, or when they're not the norm/something supported as norm by world/society around.
Anyway, all I'm getting at was that it was interesting becoming bit more aware about something I've been thinking about occasionally for a while now. Especially as I've become aware it's limited my actions in the past, such as when I, after having done very well in elementary and upper secondary still couldn't envision continuing to University rather than choosing something semi-practical one could "find a job in" (even if it was graphic design, it was still more APPLIED rather than academic), only to realize after six years of studies that I was far more suited to academic studies than graphic design. And it took a year studying at a university as an exchange student to concrete that realization at that. Even now I have a pretty concrete job as a main goal, but I can think of other possibilities if it doesn't work out.
We had an assignment where we traveled to certain selected stations on the Stockholm underground and observed them from a class perspective. The assignment and discussion in class afterwards also touched on our own class background and how it affects our perception of different places.
This was interesting to me because growing up I never really developed any conscious idea of class. Probably because I lived in the same area until after upper secondary and was essentially part of the "normal" there. Lower middle class I suppose, if I had to set a word to it?
Dad worked as a chemist (until some years ago) in a stable job and mom as a home daycarer for the community, me and my three siblings lived in a rented three bedroom apartment that my parents later bought. The house itself was one of three similar ones around a playground, in a relatively small village right outside the capital area, with three elementary schools, two grocery stores, a hairdresser and a pub/restaurant or two.
Later in life, I found out it had a bad reputation as a place with drunks and addicts and violence, but by then I'd already moved away. Maybe I was just an oblivious child, but as a preteen I used to go on walks in the middle of the night and was never scared (that was before I learned that as a woman I am never safe, but that's another thing).
Yet, despite not having any strong feeling of belonging in a certain class, I do feel more or less out of place in certain contexts. For example, when we visited the very luxurious shopping center at Karlaplan on the course of the assignment, where most patrons were visibly middle-upper class, and even the grocery store was stylishly decorated, I felt like I stuck out, that I should have been better dressed or just. Someone else. And in our second place at a trendy area with rushing traffic I could mostly perceive it as a place that I might pass through quite comfortably, but couldn't really visualize being part of the culture itself.
The place I felt most at home was our last stop at Hallunda, with it's shopping center with its outlet stores and cheap interior decoration. And thinking back, my family would have gone to places like that, or to middle class big chain markets, whereas the world of fancy upscale stores was completely foreign to us. If you wanted something fancier, you looked for it at the flea market. Which, one can make really cool finds second hand, don't think I'm putting them down. My point is, that's the way I've learned to function from my family (and current economic limitations for that matter). Probably only enforced by the fact that my parents' background was if anything probably lower down on the class ladder, so even if they had extra money they were probably prone to be a bit careful with it.
I talked to another girl about this, who said her family had a very definite working class identity, which I thought was interesting because my own was so undefined. She pointed out that in her family's case part of it was that they were actually quite wealthy, and in a way had to, one could say, actively work to retain their identity against the realities of their life which went against it. Which often seems to be the case with identities, they become stronger with... resistance, or when they're not the norm/something supported as norm by world/society around.
Anyway, all I'm getting at was that it was interesting becoming bit more aware about something I've been thinking about occasionally for a while now. Especially as I've become aware it's limited my actions in the past, such as when I, after having done very well in elementary and upper secondary still couldn't envision continuing to University rather than choosing something semi-practical one could "find a job in" (even if it was graphic design, it was still more APPLIED rather than academic), only to realize after six years of studies that I was far more suited to academic studies than graphic design. And it took a year studying at a university as an exchange student to concrete that realization at that. Even now I have a pretty concrete job as a main goal, but I can think of other possibilities if it doesn't work out.