Trowa Barton/Quatre Winner, Five senses: smell
Title: Fallen 4/5
Author: Misanagi
Theme: Five senses: smell
Rating: PG
Warnings: AU. Fusion (mostly) with the movie City of Angels. Quatre's POV
Summary: An angel and a human… it's happened before.
Thanks to Anne for the beta.
---
I didn't go back. I wanted to see him again desperately but after the kiss I understood why it wasn't possible, why I had to stay away. It didn't make it any less difficult.
He was in my thoughts all day, no matter what I did or where I went. At dusk as all the others stood in reverence hearing the music of the setting sun, I thought of his voice and how much I would rather be listening to that.
It was only a couple of days but I had grown addicted to him and even a short separation like this was affecting me. I'm not sure we are allowed to get sad, or that we even have the capacity, but if there was ever a time where I felt close to understanding that human emotion, it was now.
And then he walked into the library. His steps were long but slow; he moved gracefully as he climbed to the second floor and moved directly to the row of bookshelves where we had talked last time.
"Quatre?"
I made myself visible and noticed how his eyes widened a little.
"I know," he said. One of his hands was clutching the edge of his sweater while the other was closed in a fist.
"Trowa…" I didn't know what I was going to say but he didn't deserve my silence.
He shook his head. "I need to say this." I nodded and he lowered his eyes before continuing. "Duo explained… I can't be with someone who can't feel me, who can't taste my kisses. I can't be with you if you can't feel the way I do. I can't."
Pain, I thought as I closed my eyes and took a step back, must feel something like this. I didn't dare to look at Trowa again. Instead I said, "I understand," and let him go.
… And he left.
---
I almost didn't see Heero Yuy step into the library but he made sure he was noticed when he stood in the middle of the stairs and called my name. I made myself visible and walked up to him. "This is a library," I said, whispering. "You should keep your voice down."
"Let's go." His voice was deep and almost flat. He was scowling and I could tell he wasn't happy with me.
"Go where?" I've seen Heero many times but he had never seen me before. We belonged to different worlds and even Duo knew that it was wiser not to mix them. Him being here could only mean that Duo had changed his mind.
"Duo wants to see you." Heero glared at me. "He insisted."
I smiled. I could just picture Duo demanding, quite vocally, from his hospital bed for Heero to come here for me. "All right," I nodded to him and went to Duo.
"Holy shit, Cat!" Duo yelled when I appeared in his room. "At least knock or something!"
"I'm sorry," I said and sat on his bed. "Heero seemed to be very determined to get me to come here."
"Don't tell me you just left him in the library without even explaining where you were going?" Duo gave me a weird look and I nodded. "Quatre! I'm sure he's all confused now going around the library looking for you." Awkwardly he reached for his cellphone on the bedside table and dialed a number. "He's here already, Heero… I'll explain later… promise… don't worry, come back now… me too."
"Sorry," I said sheepishly. I hadn't even thought about Heero or what would he think of my sudden departure.
"That's fine, Q, but you're still stupid." He sat up as best as he could in the bed and glared at me. "I can't believe you let Trowa go."
"What?" I glared back at him this time. "I didn't… He told me he couldn't be with someone like me. What was I supposed to do, Duo? He deserves better."
"He did what?" Duo threw his hands in the air and glared at the ceiling instead of me. "I can't believe it! I don't know who is more stupid, you or him."
I gave him a curious look. "He said you told him about me, that he knew and that he couldn't be with me. I can understand that."
"No you don't." he sighed and his look softened. "I told him about you. I told him everything, how you don't feel pain, or cold or hunger, how you can travel with the speed of thought, hear music at dawn and love forever. And then I told him about me, the decision I made to fall for Heero and what I gave up and gain because of him." Duo's smile was bright. "He's an idiot because he didn't understand it was a decision I've never regretted; that it has made me happier than I've ever been."
"It's good to know that." Heero was standing at the door, leaning on the frame with a small tender smile on his face. He walked inside, ignoring me, and headed straight for Duo's bed. They shared a kiss and I watched, trying not to feel envious.
"How fast did you drive?" Duo asked when they parted.
"It wasn't that far," Heero answered.
"I should go," I said, standing up. I had intruded enough and I didn't think I could watch them any longer.
"No!" Duo's voice stopped me. "You haven't heard the important part."
"I think I did," I said.
"No." This time it was Heero. He looked at me with his deep blue eyes and I had to stop and listen to what he had to say. "If Duo had told me about him before he fell I would have done the same thing Trowa did. I would have wanted him to live forever without knowing the pains of humanity." He turned his eyes away from me and smiled at Duo. "I would have been wrong too."
"He wants you, Cat." Duo smiled at me. "He wants you enough to let you go."
I looked at Duo and could tell he wasn't lying.
I knew what I had to do.
---
It was the tallest building in the city. I've been up here many times before, looking at the city below and the people rushing from one place to another. This was the first time I thought about each person, each individual, instead of the anonymous mass of people I guarded. There was a world down there, filled with limitations and gifts beyond my comprehension, a world I probably wasn't ready to enter.
It didn't matter.
I stood on the edge, my feet half in the air. All I had to do now was let go and fall. Opening my arms, I thought of Trowa, of Duo and Heero, and of my decision, what I wanted to do and would do even if I wasn't ready.
I loved him and I would do this for him, for us.
… And I let go.
---
This must be pain, was the first thing I thought when I woke up. My limbs were trembling and I was wet. There was a knot in my throat and my stomach felt heavy and empty at the same time. Various parts of my body stung and when I opened my eyes I had to shield them from the brightness of the light and colors.
I coughed and the knot in my throat tightened. I stopped and opened my mouth; the air rushed inside and came out moments later though my nose. I was breathing. I did it again and again, smiling when I was able to take air through my nose. My hands were splattered with blood and cut in various places; there was a weird smell coming from them, heavy and very different to the smell of the breeze.
"Hey, down there, are you okay?"
I was lying on the ground and around me were a couple of men, wearing a uniform and looking down at me. I smiled and my smile turned into a laugh of happiness. "Better than ever!" Picking myself up, I asked, "Where's the hospital?"
One of them gave me a look and pointed his index finger in one direction.
"Thank you," I said and started running that way. My legs hurt with each step and after a while breathing wasn't as easy but I kept going. My limbs stopped trembling just as it started raining. I never knew the rain tingled as it fell over my skin, or that it was cool and had a strong smell I couldn't really place. The rain smelt so much different than the blood, as if it was light and fresh and comforting at the same time. I knew then I liked the rain.
I don't know how long I ran before I heard the sound of a siren, loud and sharp. I stopped and looked around until I saw an ambulance on a nearby street. Taking a deep breath, I ran after it as fast as I could. The ambulance would take me to Trowa.
By the time I made it to the hospital I was covered in something wet that wasn't rain and that smelled very differently, I was having trouble breathing and my legs and arms felt heavy. "I need to see Dr. Barton," I said to the nurse in reception as I tried to breathe slowly and through my nose again.
She looked me over. "Dr. Barton isn't here, but if you head over to the ER someone will see you."
"Where is he?"
"Sir, you should really go to the ER. Dr. Barton isn't in the city, someone else will help you."
I took a step back from her counter and started running down the hall. I needed to find Trowa or someone who would tell me where to find him. I needed to see him.
"Quatre?"
I sopped running and turned around to find Heero frowning at me. "Come here," he said and entered a room. I soon recognized it as Duo's.
Duo wasn't in bed now. He was dressed and standing up, a crutch under his arm to help him balance. When he saw me, the crutch dropped to the floor and he almost fell.
"I need to find Trowa," I said as Heero moved to retrieve the crutch for Duo.
Duo smiled at me, the brightest smile I have ever seen in him. "We'll help you."
* * *
Author: Misanagi
Theme: Five senses: smell
Rating: PG
Warnings: AU. Fusion (mostly) with the movie City of Angels. Quatre's POV
Summary: An angel and a human… it's happened before.
Thanks to Anne for the beta.
---
I didn't go back. I wanted to see him again desperately but after the kiss I understood why it wasn't possible, why I had to stay away. It didn't make it any less difficult.
He was in my thoughts all day, no matter what I did or where I went. At dusk as all the others stood in reverence hearing the music of the setting sun, I thought of his voice and how much I would rather be listening to that.
It was only a couple of days but I had grown addicted to him and even a short separation like this was affecting me. I'm not sure we are allowed to get sad, or that we even have the capacity, but if there was ever a time where I felt close to understanding that human emotion, it was now.
And then he walked into the library. His steps were long but slow; he moved gracefully as he climbed to the second floor and moved directly to the row of bookshelves where we had talked last time.
"Quatre?"
I made myself visible and noticed how his eyes widened a little.
"I know," he said. One of his hands was clutching the edge of his sweater while the other was closed in a fist.
"Trowa…" I didn't know what I was going to say but he didn't deserve my silence.
He shook his head. "I need to say this." I nodded and he lowered his eyes before continuing. "Duo explained… I can't be with someone who can't feel me, who can't taste my kisses. I can't be with you if you can't feel the way I do. I can't."
Pain, I thought as I closed my eyes and took a step back, must feel something like this. I didn't dare to look at Trowa again. Instead I said, "I understand," and let him go.
… And he left.
---
I almost didn't see Heero Yuy step into the library but he made sure he was noticed when he stood in the middle of the stairs and called my name. I made myself visible and walked up to him. "This is a library," I said, whispering. "You should keep your voice down."
"Let's go." His voice was deep and almost flat. He was scowling and I could tell he wasn't happy with me.
"Go where?" I've seen Heero many times but he had never seen me before. We belonged to different worlds and even Duo knew that it was wiser not to mix them. Him being here could only mean that Duo had changed his mind.
"Duo wants to see you." Heero glared at me. "He insisted."
I smiled. I could just picture Duo demanding, quite vocally, from his hospital bed for Heero to come here for me. "All right," I nodded to him and went to Duo.
"Holy shit, Cat!" Duo yelled when I appeared in his room. "At least knock or something!"
"I'm sorry," I said and sat on his bed. "Heero seemed to be very determined to get me to come here."
"Don't tell me you just left him in the library without even explaining where you were going?" Duo gave me a weird look and I nodded. "Quatre! I'm sure he's all confused now going around the library looking for you." Awkwardly he reached for his cellphone on the bedside table and dialed a number. "He's here already, Heero… I'll explain later… promise… don't worry, come back now… me too."
"Sorry," I said sheepishly. I hadn't even thought about Heero or what would he think of my sudden departure.
"That's fine, Q, but you're still stupid." He sat up as best as he could in the bed and glared at me. "I can't believe you let Trowa go."
"What?" I glared back at him this time. "I didn't… He told me he couldn't be with someone like me. What was I supposed to do, Duo? He deserves better."
"He did what?" Duo threw his hands in the air and glared at the ceiling instead of me. "I can't believe it! I don't know who is more stupid, you or him."
I gave him a curious look. "He said you told him about me, that he knew and that he couldn't be with me. I can understand that."
"No you don't." he sighed and his look softened. "I told him about you. I told him everything, how you don't feel pain, or cold or hunger, how you can travel with the speed of thought, hear music at dawn and love forever. And then I told him about me, the decision I made to fall for Heero and what I gave up and gain because of him." Duo's smile was bright. "He's an idiot because he didn't understand it was a decision I've never regretted; that it has made me happier than I've ever been."
"It's good to know that." Heero was standing at the door, leaning on the frame with a small tender smile on his face. He walked inside, ignoring me, and headed straight for Duo's bed. They shared a kiss and I watched, trying not to feel envious.
"How fast did you drive?" Duo asked when they parted.
"It wasn't that far," Heero answered.
"I should go," I said, standing up. I had intruded enough and I didn't think I could watch them any longer.
"No!" Duo's voice stopped me. "You haven't heard the important part."
"I think I did," I said.
"No." This time it was Heero. He looked at me with his deep blue eyes and I had to stop and listen to what he had to say. "If Duo had told me about him before he fell I would have done the same thing Trowa did. I would have wanted him to live forever without knowing the pains of humanity." He turned his eyes away from me and smiled at Duo. "I would have been wrong too."
"He wants you, Cat." Duo smiled at me. "He wants you enough to let you go."
I looked at Duo and could tell he wasn't lying.
I knew what I had to do.
---
It was the tallest building in the city. I've been up here many times before, looking at the city below and the people rushing from one place to another. This was the first time I thought about each person, each individual, instead of the anonymous mass of people I guarded. There was a world down there, filled with limitations and gifts beyond my comprehension, a world I probably wasn't ready to enter.
It didn't matter.
I stood on the edge, my feet half in the air. All I had to do now was let go and fall. Opening my arms, I thought of Trowa, of Duo and Heero, and of my decision, what I wanted to do and would do even if I wasn't ready.
I loved him and I would do this for him, for us.
… And I let go.
---
This must be pain, was the first thing I thought when I woke up. My limbs were trembling and I was wet. There was a knot in my throat and my stomach felt heavy and empty at the same time. Various parts of my body stung and when I opened my eyes I had to shield them from the brightness of the light and colors.
I coughed and the knot in my throat tightened. I stopped and opened my mouth; the air rushed inside and came out moments later though my nose. I was breathing. I did it again and again, smiling when I was able to take air through my nose. My hands were splattered with blood and cut in various places; there was a weird smell coming from them, heavy and very different to the smell of the breeze.
"Hey, down there, are you okay?"
I was lying on the ground and around me were a couple of men, wearing a uniform and looking down at me. I smiled and my smile turned into a laugh of happiness. "Better than ever!" Picking myself up, I asked, "Where's the hospital?"
One of them gave me a look and pointed his index finger in one direction.
"Thank you," I said and started running that way. My legs hurt with each step and after a while breathing wasn't as easy but I kept going. My limbs stopped trembling just as it started raining. I never knew the rain tingled as it fell over my skin, or that it was cool and had a strong smell I couldn't really place. The rain smelt so much different than the blood, as if it was light and fresh and comforting at the same time. I knew then I liked the rain.
I don't know how long I ran before I heard the sound of a siren, loud and sharp. I stopped and looked around until I saw an ambulance on a nearby street. Taking a deep breath, I ran after it as fast as I could. The ambulance would take me to Trowa.
By the time I made it to the hospital I was covered in something wet that wasn't rain and that smelled very differently, I was having trouble breathing and my legs and arms felt heavy. "I need to see Dr. Barton," I said to the nurse in reception as I tried to breathe slowly and through my nose again.
She looked me over. "Dr. Barton isn't here, but if you head over to the ER someone will see you."
"Where is he?"
"Sir, you should really go to the ER. Dr. Barton isn't in the city, someone else will help you."
I took a step back from her counter and started running down the hall. I needed to find Trowa or someone who would tell me where to find him. I needed to see him.
"Quatre?"
I sopped running and turned around to find Heero frowning at me. "Come here," he said and entered a room. I soon recognized it as Duo's.
Duo wasn't in bed now. He was dressed and standing up, a crutch under his arm to help him balance. When he saw me, the crutch dropped to the floor and he almost fell.
"I need to find Trowa," I said as Heero moved to retrieve the crutch for Duo.
Duo smiled at me, the brightest smile I have ever seen in him. "We'll help you."
* * *