(no subject)
I realized yesterday that I'm at a stage where I can just as easily stay out of the rat race as integrate. I've spent the last twenty years on the edge of the race or outside and I don't know that I want to enter; on the other hand, the pressure to integrate is intense.
I was feeling quite discombobulated for several days, especially after the call for the interview. I'm feeling a little more centered now. If I stay out, I have a sense of what I'd do: continue to work at the game store (my game store. I don't own it but the community, well, it's mine) and find another part-time or full-time job or work with my parents (I have the experience & they could use the help), and save to buy my house. And garden and work on my house and practice shooting and go hunting and have time to knit and cook. And read. I used to read so much and now, well. Not as much.
I think my life and schedule this way might even be stable and open enough to get a dog again sometime after I graduate, and I really, really want a dog. It's sad: I hang out with friends and I pay more attention to their dog(s) than I do to them. I don't mean to it's just that there's this great big vacancy without a dog.
I'm not committed to it yet but I am seriously thinking on it. A part of me wonders (and I think this is largely from people asking me "what are you doing after you graduate?" and looking at me disapprovingly when I say I don't know) if I wouldn't be doing myself a huge disservice by, I don't know, not getting a foot in the door for a career or going to graduate school while it's "fresh" or whatever. But I'm more of a generalist than a specialist (my favorite feat in D&D3.5: Jack of All Trades. Easily.) and graduate school just doesn't draw me that much anymore, and I don't know, I don't want a title. I just want to be a person.
I'm reading things on unschooling again because some friends were asking me about it yesterday. I'm glad I have the background and it would help a lot to have that on my side (along with knowing I'll have my family's support) if I decide to ~go against the grain~.
And on that note, this is what I like about unschooling. There's lots of theorizing and bits on philosophy of education and life and everything like that about unschooling, and it's important and useful, but that is what unschooling is all about.
I was feeling quite discombobulated for several days, especially after the call for the interview. I'm feeling a little more centered now. If I stay out, I have a sense of what I'd do: continue to work at the game store (my game store. I don't own it but the community, well, it's mine) and find another part-time or full-time job or work with my parents (I have the experience & they could use the help), and save to buy my house. And garden and work on my house and practice shooting and go hunting and have time to knit and cook. And read. I used to read so much and now, well. Not as much.
I think my life and schedule this way might even be stable and open enough to get a dog again sometime after I graduate, and I really, really want a dog. It's sad: I hang out with friends and I pay more attention to their dog(s) than I do to them. I don't mean to it's just that there's this great big vacancy without a dog.
I'm not committed to it yet but I am seriously thinking on it. A part of me wonders (and I think this is largely from people asking me "what are you doing after you graduate?" and looking at me disapprovingly when I say I don't know) if I wouldn't be doing myself a huge disservice by, I don't know, not getting a foot in the door for a career or going to graduate school while it's "fresh" or whatever. But I'm more of a generalist than a specialist (my favorite feat in D&D3.5: Jack of All Trades. Easily.) and graduate school just doesn't draw me that much anymore, and I don't know, I don't want a title. I just want to be a person.
I'm reading things on unschooling again because some friends were asking me about it yesterday. I'm glad I have the background and it would help a lot to have that on my side (along with knowing I'll have my family's support) if I decide to ~go against the grain~.
And on that note, this is what I like about unschooling. There's lots of theorizing and bits on philosophy of education and life and everything like that about unschooling, and it's important and useful, but that is what unschooling is all about.