camel
It seems to me as a means of survival or even just comfort that people will for the most part act in service for themselves. I say the most part because there are always exceptions, but generally even some of the most noble of actions tend to have some kind of service to the ego. Hence the challenge to try and transcend in a way the codes of behaviour that seek to satisfy the ego and desire first and foremost. Not so much as a path to selflessness so much as an effort to attain freedom. The rationale being that if you can understand your actions and where your motivations come from you can hopefully deconstruct the patterns of behaviour and cultural norms and stereotypes. To empower choice by debasing that which one is compelled to choose. Its a frustrating approach and by no means perfect but it seeks to provide an adequate defence to external stimulus. to try and overcome the i want mentality.
The problem being that even when i can see the wisdom in an action that there is still a giant block in me that desperately wants to hold onto the idea of happiness. Happiness has its place but the focus is too much on needing happiness rather than accepting it. Looking for something that will make you happy rather than whole. So here i sit trying to decide as to whether i try to free myself from a desire which i really don't want to lose, though i know that should i shed this aspect then there is a greater awareness on the other side. I guess though that in some ways holding onto this desire represents a self indulgent distraction for me maybe even a defence in itself from a stark realisation. Though maybe just something i am too weak and too afraid to face.
On friday i thought this was an ok thing to be thinking about, today it seems trite and stupid. Each day brings another opportunity to deride yesterdays me.
Ima go make some walnut caramel brownies.
i don't think mice are as quiet as people say
The problem being that even when i can see the wisdom in an action that there is still a giant block in me that desperately wants to hold onto the idea of happiness. Happiness has its place but the focus is too much on needing happiness rather than accepting it. Looking for something that will make you happy rather than whole. So here i sit trying to decide as to whether i try to free myself from a desire which i really don't want to lose, though i know that should i shed this aspect then there is a greater awareness on the other side. I guess though that in some ways holding onto this desire represents a self indulgent distraction for me maybe even a defence in itself from a stark realisation. Though maybe just something i am too weak and too afraid to face.
On friday i thought this was an ok thing to be thinking about, today it seems trite and stupid. Each day brings another opportunity to deride yesterdays me.
Ima go make some walnut caramel brownies.
i don't think mice are as quiet as people say